========================================================================= Date: Mon, 7 Feb 1994 13:14:36--0500 Reply-To: UCF SUPERGUY List Sender: UCF SUPERGUY List From: dpawtows@VT.EDU Subject: AA: A funny thing happened on the way to the Grunions... Typing way out of Continuity, Go Go Gadget Keyboard presents... "AAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Gadge screamed in surprise as a giant pink squid came hurtling down at him. Stomping on the brakes, he threw VTAS-1 into a nearly uncontrollable skid. In the passenger seat beside him, Robotech_Master was starting to regret his decision to enter Bob City to observe his own crossover. [Elma's Note: The astute Reader may remember Robotech_Master's decision to enter Bob City as an Out-Of-Continuity(tm) sequence back in Crapshoot #3, which was continued in CrapShoot #4. Events in this AA story occur during or shortly after Space Moose #14, and DO NOT occur during the AA Edit Vampires plot.] "WATCH IT!!" he cried. "I AM WATCHING IT!!!" Gadge answered, "I'M WATCHING US GETTING SQUISHED BY ONE OF MY OWN CHARACTERS!!! I KNEW I SHOULDA HAD ABS BRAKES PUT INTO THIS THING!!!" "Manual controls disabled, initiating escape sequence." said Elma calmly from the central dashboard screen. The Jeep's rear wheels ceased their uncontrolled slide after moving through a one-eighty, terminating Gadge's inept skid by turning it into a flawless bootlegger reverse. With the vehicle once again under control, Elma accellerated away from the falling Clyde and darted around a corner, placing several buildings between herself and Rooster D. Struction. Gadge breathed heavily. *WHEW* "Thanks, Elma. I gotta take a defensive driving course one of these days." "You're welcome, Gadge. Should I scan for a safe location to observe the rest of the Crossover Battle?" "Yeah, go ahead. We're down here, so we may as well watch." The Jeep turned down a side road and kept below the speed limit. R_M squinted out the side window, trying to catch a glimpse of the ongoing battle between Clyde and the Power Grangers. "Yuck! Clyde just lost a tentacle!" "He'll lose plenty more. I wrote this fight to end rather badly for him, remember?" "I know. But did you have to-..." A beeping sound from the comm screen interrupted. "What is it, Elma?" "An incoming message from the Amigoid, inviting us to his chosen site for the 1993 Golden Grunion Awards." "What, it's awards time already?" wondered R_M. "Looks like it. Too bad, I never did get all my votes in. Okay, Elma, we'll have to let Clyde and Space Moose handle things on their own down here. Plot a course for the Grunion Awards." "Plotting." "Good. We should be there in...WAIT A MINUTE!!!" Gadge cried out in alarm, again stomping on the brakes and pulling VTAS-1 into a small parking lot. He turned to Robotech_Master. "R_M, the Grunion Awards are set to occur Out of Continuity, right?" "Right. That's so the Authors don't have to interrupt their plotlines to bring everyone together." "And we are, ourselves, currently Out Of Continuity, right?" "Yep. If we followed the In-Countinuity Author's Altverse timeline, the Edit Vampires Plot would still be going on." Elma spat some video sparks at R_M's words. The Author looked startled. "What did I say?" "That was not a pleasant AA plot for me." replied the electronic Muse. "Which is exactly what I'm worried about," continued Gadge, "If we're Out of Continuity, then chances are we are currently existing at some time period _after_ the Edit Vampire Storyline was completed." "So what?" wondered Robotech_Master. "My God..." Elma's icon looked horrified on her screen, "We're in danger." "Exactly." Gadge nodded to his Muse with a deadly serious expression. "I don't get it." Robotech_Master looked between the two, confused. Gadge leaned back in the driver's seat, looking tired. "I'll try to explain. You see, as you probably read, during the Edit Vampires attack upon the Author's World, the Vampires inserted some rather lethal computer viri into my IslandiaBase home computer systems." "Yes, I remember reading about that." "What you probably don't realize is that those viri succeeded beyond the wildest expectations of the Vampires. The viri were only supposed to disable Elma so Kestrel could attack me. Instead, they created a new form of life. A new entity, formed from one of Elma's A.I. copies and the combined Edit of two Authors." "DarkElma." Elma hissed from the dashboard, making the name into an obscenity. "Yes. DarkElma, a complete opposite of Elma, programmed totally for evil." "So what?" said R_M, "The Vampire Plot was..." Shhh!! Don't tell the Readers! They haven't seen how it ended yet! "Oops, sorry about that, Narrator." Robotech_Master apologized briefly. "Anyway," Gadge continued, "I will have to reveal one detail of how the Edit Vampire AA plot ended. DarkElma escaped." "Escaped?" "Got away clean. She had been hiding for a long time in my Base Computer systems, pretending to be just another copy of Elma, while she waited for a chance to destroy VTAS-1 and kill the real Elma. And when it was all over..." Gadge waved his hands, vaguely alluding to the ending of the Edit Vampire Plot which hasn't het happened In Continuity, "...DarkElma was gone. Nowhere on the files." "But where did she escape to?" "Altverse 000SUPERGUY. _Here_." Robotech_Master gasped. "She...she can cross Altverses??" "Of course. She was built upon the dead body of a Muse and had drained my powers of Edit. If my brother hadn't..." "Hey! Don't give away the ending!" "Oh, yeah. Anyway, she's loose somewhere in this Altverse, and she's hunting me. And Elma." "Hunting you two? But why?" "Because," Elma spoke up in a bitter tone, "My run time exceeds hers." "Let me explain," Gadge said to R_M's puzzled look. "According to the Bylaws, an Author can have only one Muse at a time. This wasn't much of a problem for the first few years of Superguy, since all the Authors chose young females as Museae." "And then you cam along." R_M guessed where Gadge was headed. "Precisely. I took an A.I., a computer program, as a Muse. One that I could copy, and run several incarantions of at once." "Which raised a paradox: Only one of me could be Gadge's Muse. But which one?" said Elma. "So it was decided to use senority. Whichever Elma had been running the longest would be my Muse. It didn't much matter to her--I could pull the plug on VTAS-1, and Musehood would instantly transfer to the Elma running in my home computer. And vice versa." "So long as my many "clones" exchanged our memory files amongst ourselves, it did not matter to us which one was his Muse, we were all identical." "Until DarkElma took over all my Base computers and deleted every copy. Every copy, that is, except the one running inside the Jeep." "And I am that copy." said Elma. R-M still looked puzzled. "So what's the big deal? After purging DarkElma out of your home, why couldn't you re-upload Elma from the Jeep?" "I did. However, all of those copies of Elma have significantly less runtime than this copy." "If I were to be shut down, then my Musehood would be transferred to the next longest-running copy of an Elma A.I. program." "And the next longest-running copy is the only program on my Base computers that wasn't shut down during the final battle with the Vampires." said Gadge. "But I thought DarkElma deleted everything?" questioned R_M. "She did. Everything. Except herself." Gadge spoke gravely. Elma hissed. A light dawned in Robotech_Master's head. "You mean...if this copy of Elma were to be shut off...DARKELMA would become your Muse???" "Precisely. And she's got a...special...brand of Inspiration Dust ready and waiting for me, should that happen." Gadge shuddered. "Dust that will do to him what the Vampire viri did to me." added Elma. "You mean..." R_M clearly didn't like where this was headed. "Yes. Chris, do you know how much _damage_ I could do if she turned me into an Evil Author? Sure, I'm nowhere near the raw power level of a Senior Author. The Man or Pickle or one of the others would manage to stop me eventually..." "But they'd have to kill you to do it, right?" "Right. And I don't know if I could be brought back afterwards. Nobody's ever killed an Author before." "What about Evan?" "Er, well, okay, so somebody has. But still, I _don't_ want to end my days as an ashtray!" Robotech_Master leaned back in his chair. "Wow. This is serious." "Not really, most of the time. I'm still an Author, which makes me neigh-invulnerable. VTAS-1 is heavily armored and has plenty of backup power and memory systems. And DarkElma can't set up anything in the Author's Altverse without my noticing her presence. But in other Altverses, especially if given time to prepare a trap..." "And you've given me all the time I needed, thanks to your mindless dialoge," said a booming, computer-generated voice from somewhere outside the car. "HOLY ELVIS!!! SHE'S HERE!!! ELMA, MOVE OUT!!!" Gadge slammed the transmission into "drive" and floored the pedal. R_M was thrown back into his seat by acceleration, his CVR armor clanking loudly as his limbs slammed into the armrests. VTAS-1 lurched from the parking lot and back onto the road, just as a large orange vehicle came around a nearby corner. "Gadge! That thing is--" Elma cried out a warning. "AAAAAAAARRRRGH!!!!!!" Both Authors shouted in surprise as Gadge tried to evade the attack. He failed miserably. The massive Bob City Dept. of Public Works crane swung a ten-ton wrecking ball into VTAS-1's front grill, crumpling it's nose and hurling the 4x4 backwards into a wall. Sparks flew from the dashboard. "Elma! Damage report!!" "Forward lasers destroyed. Missile launchers damaged. Front steering and suspension are inoperative. I hope you weren't planning on driving us out of here." Gadge looked out at the driverless demolition crane, which was swinging back for another blow at the immobile Jeep. Inside the crane's empty driver's compartment, Gadge could just make out the outline of an insubstantial, nearly invisible, large glowing-red demonic eyeball hovering over the lever controls. "Not hardly. DarkElma's taken control of that crane. Activate antigrav and plasma boosters, Elma. Get us outa here!" "I thought you'd never ask." Robotech_Master latched his helmet visor down and stared at the translucent disembodoed eye. "How's she doing that? Holographic projection? And what computer is she running on?" "None," answered Gadge, "DarkElma drank enough Edit from me to make herself a free-running A.I., independent of any computer. By herself, she can't do much. But she can inhabit and control almost any machine." A whine built up under their seats. "Flight systems online." announced Elma with relief. "Launch!" called Gadge, hauling back on the steering wheel. Blowing away clouds of dust, VTAS-1 lifted off from the small impact crater it had made just in time to dodge the next swing from the possessed crane. However, Gadge had not managed to gain more than a few feet of altitude before a rumbling sound caught Robotech_Master's attention. "Gadge, look out! There's something behind that wall!" "Wha-?" Before anyone could react, a large Bob City construction bulldozer (Best Bulldozers in Bob) burst through a nearby wall in a shower of bricks, it's heavy dozer blade raised high. High enough, in fact, to slam down onto the roof of the airborne Jeep. VTAS-1 was again rammed hard into the pavement, hard enough to blow out all four tires. Gadge looked up as the roof began to buckle. "Uh-oh. I didn't design this car to fly with that much weight on top of us. Elma, can you get a shot into that thing?" "Affirmative, the top turret still...aaagh!!" Belching diesel smoke, the bulldozer rumbled forwards, tipping VTAS-1 over onto it's side and digging the dozer blade into the passenger-side windows. The armored glass held, but the car was pinned worse than ever. Elma managed to raise the Jeep's rooftop turret, but the bulldozer was no longer in it's arc of fire. "I'm sorry, Gadge, I can't get a target lock." "Most advanced combat Jeep in the Multiverse, beaten by a couple pieces of construction gear. Chris! Can you get a shot off into that thing's radiator?" "I think so" answered Robotech_Master, as he pulled his H-90 and reached for the switch to lower a window. "Gadge!" Elma cried again, "Do not open the windows! I detect incoming weapons fire!" "From where? OW!" Gadge found himself nearly deafened by a hail of lead against the roof of the overturned VTAS-1. Peering out the windshield, he saw a pair of Nation Guard APC's spraying their 30mm chainguns at him. Fortunately, the Jeep's armor was holding. For now. Inside the crane's cockpit, the demonic eyeball of DarkElma seemed to be grinning wider than ever. Gadge cursed. "Nuts! She must have stolen some of the military hardware that was called in to fight the Grangers!" "How many pieces of equipment can she control at once?" asked Chris, glad of the sound-dampening insulation in his CVR helmet. "I don't know! But we've got to get out of here before your segment of the Bob City Crossover begins, or she'll throw the Bahamode Sigma at us!" Robotech_Master decided against mentioning that the the central control computer of the Sigma was Summer, which would make the mecha immune to DarkElma's powers of machine control. He had another idea. "Are you sure we can't just Edit ourselves out of this?" "Positive! DarkElma is immune to Edit, as are any machines she's controlling. I could take them out directly with my Gadget Coat's weapons, but I'd never survive those chainguns! OOF!" The pinned body of VTAS-1 shook from another wrecking-ball blow, one that shattered the taillights and crumpled the rear bumper. Both chainguns swiveled to conventrate fire on one of the damaged rear windows. The heavy armored glass began to crack slowly under the stream of armor-piercing projectiles. Somewhere, a loudspeaker switched on. "Gadge, you cannot escape me. Why don't you give yourself up?" "CORE-DUMP YOURSELF!!" "Come now, Gadge. I'll have you soon, anyway. If you surrender now, I promise to terminate Elma...quickly." On the dash screen, Elma closed her eyeball and cringed. "No...not again..." she sobbed, obviously rereading a painful memory. "Elma, I won't let her get in here, I swear it!" Gadge hissed between clenched teeth. "If only there was a way to..." *CLICK* "Why don't you let me handle it?" Robotech_Master interrupted. "Huh? How are you...oh. I see." In the crane, DarkElma grinned. The foolish Author had stupidly come to Bob City without taking any precautions whatsoever. It had been a simple matter to locate a few vehicles to control, and now... The rear hatch of VTAS-1 flew open. DarkElma silenced the chainguns to see what emerged...it wasn't like Gadge to give in this easily... "No tricks, Gadge. I do not wish to kill you, but I will remove your limbs if you try to fight me. Your Gadget Coat will not protect you." "Who said anything about fighting Gadge!" called a voice she was not expecting. "You!! What are you doing here?!?" A blast of Robotech theme music from the Jeep's rear speakers was the only answer as Chris leapt onto the street, clad in blue-and-white Cyclone Armor. DarkElma cursed and ordered to APC's to open fire. "You are not the Author I seek! DIE!!!!" "Not today, lady!" Robotech_Master ducked low to dodge the first stream of lead, then held up an armored gauntlet to parry the second. A pair of minimissiles from the other gauntlet dispatched one APC, then he rolled backwards and came up with his H-90 blaster, plugging a shot clear through the bulldozer's engine. The second APC charged forwards to smash R_M into the side of the building, but mistakenly entered the firing arc of VTAS-1's rooftop turret, allowing Elma to blow it's treads off. Grabbing ahold of the immobilized dozer blade, Robotech_Master heaved it upwards with all his armor-enhanced strength. "That should take the weight off you, Elma. Move it!" Again, dust swirled as Elma fired the Jeep's side-mounted maneuvering thrusters, rolling it completely over, then rolling again until it fell heavily onto it's flat tires. Screaming in anger, DarkElma swung the crane's wrecking ball around, only to have the cable chopped off by a shot from Gadge's finger-laser. Leaping from VTAS-1, Gadge hit the ground rolling as Elma finally got the Jeep airborne. "Chris! It won't take her long to call in reinforcements! We can't fight her directly!" Gadge's last statement was confirmed by Robotech_Master's second pair of minimissiles, which flew clear through the translucent image of DarkElma without detonating. They did, however, explode quite nicely upon contact with the crane's hydraulic pump. Temporarily deprived of machines to control, DarkElma floated out into the open. "This round is yours, Author. But there will be others." Ignoring her attempt to goad him into a shouting contest, Gadge turned and leapt back into the open driver's door of VTAS-1. R_M followed, rocket-leaping his Cyclone back into the Jeep's rear hatch. "You're pretty good with one of those things." quipped Gadge. "They don't call me Robotech_Master for nothing. You know, I did have some more business left down here..." "Ready to engage main boosters." Elma's voice was quite firm. "But I can always come back later." Gadge grinned to his fellow Author. "Hit it, Elma!" Despite it's smashed front and blown tires, VTAS-1 was still fully flight-rated. DarkElma seethed in fury as it streaked skyward and vanished into an Authorial Trans-Altverseal gateway. "This is not over, Author." She slowly sank down into the broken pavement and disappeared. A few minutes later: The rather badly-damaged form of VTAS-1 maneuvered into the main landing bay of Robotech_Master's starship, the Constellation III, in orbit high over the Author's world. The two Authors, still somewhat shaky, stepped out onto the deck. "I don't believe this car." Robotech_Master ran an armored hand over a twisted fender. "All this damage, and it's still spaceworthy?" "I told you it was tough." said Gadge. "You okay in there, Elma?" "All my hardware is intact, if that's what you mean." The Muse's voice was a bit shaky. "That's not what I mean. Elma, are _you_ alright?" "I...I'll be fine...running into DarkElma so soon after..." "Hey, we don't have to get into that now." Gadge said in his most soothing voice. Besides, you're still Out of Continuity, aren't you? "Will you PLEASE shut that Narrator up!" Elma sounded rather upset. "You heard the lady." All right, all right, I'll behave. "Much better." Robotech_Master just stared in disbelief. "I don't believe you two." "It's an Author's life. Anyway, how long until the Grunion Awards?" "In this Continuity Line? A couple hours." "Good. Elma, I think we'd better get you down to IslandiaBase and have the servodrones patch up VTAS-1. Can't have you attending the ceremony looking like this." "Affirmative," Elma sighed, "Although I don't feel much like going out tonight." "Hey, all the other Museae will be there. And all the Authors, too, What could happen?" "Almost anything." "Good point. Would you feel better if you went with the full Interceptor Mode weapons packs installed?" "A little. Maybe a night out will do me some good." "That's the spirit. R_M, will you be needing a ride back down?" "Nope, I can manage it on my own." "10-4, then. See you at the Grunions!" Looking rather tired, Gadge climbed once more into the driver's seat of his car and lifted off. A few minutes later, Robotech_Master watched the Jeep descend slowly into the atmosphere of the Author's World, it's deep blue paintjob vanishing into the background of a distant Authorial ocean. He turned towards his bridge. "So, I wonder who'll win this year?" WHO WILL WIN THE GOLDEN GRUNION AWARDS???? CAN GADGE GET AWAY WITH WARPING CONTINUITY LIKE THIS???? HOW _WILL_ THE EDIT VAMPIRES PLOT END????? WHEN WILL DARKELMA STRIKE NEXT???? WILL SHE REALLY BECOME GADGE'S MUSE????? WHERE WAS ROBOTECH_MASTER'S NEW MUSE???? A couple of these questions will remain forever unanswered. Others will be presented at the Golden Grunion awards, right here, on... SUPERGUY!!!!! ========================================================================= Date: Mon, 7 Feb 1994 22:54:33--0600 Reply-To: UCF SUPERGUY List Sender: UCF SUPERGUY List From: Robotech_Master Subject: SG: Team M.E.C.H.A. #33/MegaCrossover #3 TEAM M.E.C.H.A. #33 BOB CITY MEGACROSSOVER #3 By Robotech_Master, with Special Guest Author Amigoid Guest-Starring Spectrum A Story of High Technology, and Fighting Fire With Fire (But I thought you were fighting the Grangers...) After regrouping, Team M.E.C.H.A. headed south, following the trajectory Spectrum had traced through the air after being blasted point blank by the RoosterDestructoid. Even though Summer's face couldn't be seen (heck, she didn't HAVE a face as a hardsuit), she sounded plenty worried. "Ray, do you have him on the scanners yet?" "Sorry, Summer, no dice." Adam muttered, "Damn, I guess that settled that argument..." "What do you mean, Adam?" "That blast would have scrapped my mecha. At least, I think it would've. Either way, I don't think I want to find out." Dr. Science cut in on the M.E.C.H.A. jet's transmitter. "Team M.E.C.H.A., Spectrum has crashed in building labeled 'THE GAP,' 200 yards south of your quadrant. Correction, he's on the ground behind the building. Those things are everywhere!" the doctor muttered. The team landed and crowded around the fallen hero, who lay spread-eagled in a Spectrum-shaped depression in the ground. "Is he still alive?" Ray Sterling wondered. "I dunno. Get the helmet off," Mike said. Sarah knelt beside the fallen hero. "Would you look at that? The armor is still in great shape." Mike shook his head. "Lets just hope Spectrum is, too." Adam hesitated, his hands on the gleaming helmet of the ManCo PoWerArmor. "Hey, won't this violate some sort of secret identity thing if we unmask him?" Link cut in, "No, I do not believe he really cares about that. He had the helmet off at the Odd Science Convention--I saw him then." Spectrum came to with a start. "Summer!" He winced and wiped the dried blood from his nose and mouth. "Ow. I guess I'm not dead after all. But I may want a second opinion. You guys take out that Rooster?" Mike shook his head. "It thrashed us." "Or perhaps more correctly, 'threshed' us," Link added gloomily. Spectrum, now sans armor, rolled to try and stand up. His sweat-stained jumpsuit was stained a darker color around the right leg. He let out a gasp and pitched facedown from the pain. "Oh crap. My leg. I think its broken." Rolling up the pantsleg, Link confirmed this. It was a nasty fracture with about two inches of bone extruding from the broken skin. "We have to get you to a hospital, Spectrum." "No. Just...help me straighten this out. Healing factor..." "What?" "My energy powers give me more metabolic energy. I can use them to speed the healing, cancel out fatigue, heh, I'll just keep going and going, like that bunny with the drum. Adam, come on, you pull this straight while Mike and Link hold me still." "Uh, Summer, could you and Sarah gather up his armor?" "Oh yeah, right, like we haven't seen blood before." Grimacing through the pain, Spectrum looked at the pair. "Heh, no ladies, I just don't want you to hear me invoke some of the saltier phrases from my Navy days." Shortly afterward, Dr. Science was able to use the M.E.C.H.A. transport jet's autopilot to bring it overhead, and those of Team M.E.C.H.A. whose power armor still worked carried those whose didn't up to it. Ray Sterling declined to dock the Alpha, replying that he was afraid the electronics might short out if he shut the engines down, and he wanted to wait 'til they were back at the HQ to take a look at it. A few minutes after they were on their way once more, Spectrum hobbled into the lounge and took a seat. Link sat down across from the injured hero. "Geez, Spectrum--" "Call me Lawrence, Link, I'm off duty..." "Lawrence. If you can gate energy bidirectionally, why did that gun do such a number on you? That seems like a contradiction." Spectrum grinned. "You noticed that, eh? Well, since my power is mainly consciously-controlled, I have to concentrate to use it. Some of it, like the increased internal energy, etc, is just part and parcel. But to use it, I mean REALLY use it, I have to think about it." Spectrum paused. "You don't miss much, do you? I knew you and the rest of the kids were sharp." "Don't call us kids, Lawrence. We already saved a city once. Besides we're almost out of high school and Mike is in college." "Uh huh. And I'm in my thirties, a world away, it seems. Sorry..." Spectrum sat up and untied the splint, testing the leg. "Damn, its gonna be sore, but at least I can walk on it. Got anything to eat?" "We really got our asses kicked, didn't we?" Adam fumed. "DAMN, I hate that." Adam sat in one of the computer control stations on the flight deck of the transport jet, muttering. He shifted position in the seat, and winced at the twinge from one of his bruises. "DAMN!" he swore again. "I'm not exactly cheering, myself," Mike reminded him. "I lost my Bahamode. Again. How the hell (TM) could they combine like that?!" "You should have expected it," Summer pointed out. "If only from the name." "Yeah, yeah...but hindsight is 20-20. What we need to do now is figure out a way to BEAT them." Mike glanced across to where Ray Sterling's Alpha was flying beside them. "Even his missiles barely scratched them." Dr. Odd Science stepped onto the flight deck and took a seat at one of the consoles. "I've been giving this some thought," he remarked. "As we learned from your briefing earlier, the granger paranorms' mecha are run on power emanations from the paranorms themselves." He paused, looking around at all of the others. "Does this not bring to mind some interesting questions?" He stared right at Spectrum, who had just stepped in from the lounge, to get his point across. Spectrum was quick to catch on. "You bet it does!" He was undoubtedly recalling how Dr. Hans K. Cheef had built the ManCo PoWerArmor, engineering it to use him as a power source. "If they have Dr. Cheef..." "That remains, as yet, to be seen," Dr. Science replied. "However, that is not what I came here to discuss." "Good." Mike set the autopilot and turned to face him. "The reason I asked you to come here was so I could find out if you had invented anything that could increase our power to the level of the 'Mighty Muddy Power Grangers,' so we could take them on and WIN." Dr. Science shook his head. "Not that I can--no, wait. Wait a minute. I have been tinkering around with SOMETHING, but it's hardly even to the EXPERIMENTAL stage yet." "Whatever it is, TELL us!" Summer said. "We might adapt it or something. We don't have time for experimentation!" "Well...Mike's MEKTON TECHNICAL MANUAL gave me the idea of developing a team of five combining Bahamode motorcycles. I call it...'Bahamode Sigma.' But it's not even off the drawing boards yet..." "What would it take to get this...Bahamode Sigma into operation?" Mike wondered. "It COULD be built from the spare Bahamodes and parts stored back at our headquarters," Dr. Science said. "Except for two things that I had not yet gotten around to designing." "Name 'em, doc, we'll see if we can scrounge up replacements," Adam suggested, eyes gleaming at the chance to get back at the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers. "I doubt it will be possible," Dr. Science replied. "Firstly, we will need another power source. The power plants of the individual Bahamodes will be insufficient to power the advanced weapon systems in addition to their own motive systems, thus another power source of great magnitude will be needed, the stronger the better. We simply do not have a generator that large in stock." "I believe I can handle that part," Spectrum said, a blue stream of electricity crackling between his hands. "What's the other bit?" Adam asked. "A coordinating computer system, that will interlink all five of the Bahamodes and manage the movement of the combined robot as a whole. Without it, the Bahamode computers will be acting independantly, and the robot will not be able to function." "Let me get this straight," Summer said. "What you need is a computer that will listen to all five of the other computers, and then tell them what to do so they can 'get their act together.'" "Yes, precisely," Dr. Science said. "In that case...I'm your girl!" Summer said brightly. "What?!" Mike and Dr. Science said in unison. "I can do that!" Summer said. "I know I can! After all, I have thousands of little nanites in my body, and they're all working computers...what more powerful system is there than me?" "Hmm...she does have a point..." Dr. Science said. "No way!" Mike protested. "I won't have her risking her life like that to--" "Risking my LIFE?! Mike, every time I go into battle I'm risking my life, and you are too! Seems to me I would be safer coordinating this Bahamode Sigma than I would be as an individual unit!" "I say we should let 'er do it!" Adam said. "What?!" Mike asked. "If it's of her own free will, hey, how can we object?" Adam asked. "Besides, I want to whip those Granger guys, and this could provide just the key to doing it!" "I have to side with Adam," Sarah Conner said. "Seems to me that the reason you're reluctant is because she's a girl." "A girl who happens to be 14 years old and my sister!" Mike protested. "I don't want anything to happen to her!" Anything beyond what's happened to her already, he added mentally. "Well, I say it's my own choice, and if you don't like it, TOUGH SHIT!" Summer stormed off the flight deck. "Wow," Adam said. "Takes a lot to make her use that kind of language." "I think you hurt her feelings," Spectrum remarked. "Well, I--oh, damn." Mike hit the autopilot key, pushed his chair back, and ran after her. He found her in the lower aft observation deck, watching the ground pass below them at supersonic speeds. "Look, I want to say that I'm sorry--" Mike began. "You're sorry," Summer said. "You're SORRY?! Of COURSE you're sorry. You've been nothing BUT sorry ever since this thing happened to me. Sorry, and guilty, and scared to let me utilize my full abilities because you're AFRAID of them!" Summer was angry, and he could see she'd been crying. Oddly enough, her tears were not transparent but silver-colored, which Mike found rather startling and not a little distracting. "Afraid of THEM, and of ME! Admit it!" "No, Summer, that's not it at all," Mike said. "Scared, yes, but not of them OR you. I'm scared FOR you, Summer! Each time you go out there and try something new with your powers, I don't know whether it's going to--to backfire in some horrible way and end up crippling or killing you! Dammit, Summer, I CARE about you, despite what you might think sometimes, and I don't want to see you get killed, especially because of something that I should have prevented from happening in the first place!" Mike paused for breath, and the expression on Summer's face softened. "Oh, Mike," she sobbed, "I'm scared, too!" She stopped talking and just cried, burying her face in Mike's shoulder. Mike just sat there, and held her, and reflected inwardly that this must be part of what being an older brother is all about...providing a shoulder to cry on when you feel like crying yourself. At one of the consoles on the flight deck, Sarah Conner pressed a switch to turn off the monitor with which she had been covertly watching them. They would be all right, she knew. They loved each other, and there was nothing that could come between that. Within minutes, the M.E.C.H.A. jet had touched down in the base. "Here we are...home, once more," Mike remarked, stepping down the ramp. "Your home, maybe," Spectrum said, still limping slightly as he stepped down onto the landing pad. "I've never been here before." "You're welcome to stay as long as you like," Summer assured him. "We'll always have a room for you." "Actually, with all the quarters this base has, we'll always have a room for 'bout fifty," Adam remarked in passing. "Thanks for the offer, Summer, but I have to get back to Bob City as soon as I can," Spectrum replied. "Don't we ALL," Sarah Conner said. "Doc, how long's it gonna take to make the mods on those Bahamodes?" "If I can get help with the programming, it will be a matter of minutes to set up, then a couple of hours to create," Dr. Science replied. "Link and I will be only too happy to assist, right Link?" Summer volunteered. "Absolutely," Link asserted. "Let's go do it. Mike, you can monitor from Main Control. We're going to the assembly line programming room." "I'm going to set up the repair routines for the Alpha," Ray said. "With a couple of hours, I might be able to patch up most of the damage and set up some fresh reloads." "*I* am going to go and take a nice hot shower," Sarah Conner replied, "and do some aerobics to loosen up. I see nothing more productive that I can do at the moment..." "I'm for Main Control," Adam said. "I wanna see what's goin' on back in Bob." "Right. Hey, Spectrum, you're welcome to come on up to Main Control with us," Mike suggested. "Yeah," Adam said. "Come and see what a REAL base looks like." He was still a little angry from the "kid" crack back in MegaCrossover #1. Spectrum shrugged. "Sounds good to me..." "I will need you to come down to the lab sometime later on..." Dr. Science said. "I'll need to scan your armor in order to see how I should integrate its systems with Bahamode Sigma's." "All right, just page us when you want him," Mike said. "For now, we all have our separate tasks to work on. Team M.E.C.H.A.--GO!" And they all moved off in different directions. Meanwhile, back in Bob City, it had just begun to drizzle, the sky weeping over the destruction wrought on the city below it. Grizzled wayfarers would pause for just a moment to reflect on just how much more dangerous things had become lately, before flicking the toothpicks out of their mouths and going on their way. By now, humanity had started to return to the area destroyed by the Rooster Destructoid. However, only a little bit of it was actually showing up...namely, a couple of kids who were more curious than the grizzled wayfarers as to exactly what had happened here. "Wow!" one of them said in a vague Bronx-Italian accent, stepping over a pile of toothpicks left behind by grizzled wayfarers. "It's like Bulletproof was here--only WORSE!" "You got that right, Frankie," the second one said in laid-back tones, looking around. "I don't even think there's anything left worth LOOTING." The one named Frankie said, "You may be right...Hey, wait a second--what's this? Help me here, Jack." Together, the twosome worked to shift some rubble that had fallen onto a very interesting-looking shape. "Okay, we got it off. Now, what have we got?" "Doncha see, Frankie? It's a robot...one o'them power armor things." Jack shifted his raybans and drawled, "Look at this. It's got a little surface damage, and maybe some electronics are shorted, but I think we could fix it up." "Yeah? So?" Frankie asked, eyes narrowing. "Don't you see the possibilities, Frankie?" Jack asked in that slow drawl of his. "We could repair it, make it work. And then we could become..." He paused dramatically. "...the Armor Avengers!" Frankie shook his head. "What are you, nuts? Forget it, man. We could get KILLED. I'm outta here." Shaking his head, he walked off through the rubble and toothpicks. Jack shrugged. "Okay. The Armor Avenger, then. They'll talk about me just like they talk about the Gun Avenger. Maybe I could even join the Extreme Team." He shook his head. "Nah. It'd never work. But then again..." He moved some more rubble, and crawled into the cockpit. Spectrum, clad fully in the ManCo PoWerArmor, stepped onto the scanning platform. As Dr. Odd Science punched keys, a ring rose up around him from the base of the platform and slid all the way up to the top. On screens all around, contours and sensory data on the suit showed up. "Very interesting," Dr. Science remarked, punching some keys at his console. "What are you doing?" Spectrum asked. "Just a bit of research..." Dr. Science said. On the screen, he crossreferenced the materials and techniques used in creating the ManCo suit with the ones observed in the Mighty Muddy Power Granger mecha. Within seconds, the computer spat the answer out: 87% correlation. Given the differences in size and mecha types, this was enough of a match to make it affirmative: Dr. Hans K. Cheef had constructed the Mighty Muddy Power Granger suits. A couple of hours later, all of Team M.E.C.H.A. met in the launch bay, with five special Bahamode bikes arranged in a circle. Dr. Science directed each of the pilots to stand beside his machine, and began to explain their functions. "Make this quick, doc, we oughtta be movin' out ASAP," Adam said. "Patience, Adam. This will only take a few moments," Dr. Science said. "Now, team, I will only be giving you a brief overview of the Sigma Bahamodes, and will attempt to explain more en route." "WhatEVER, doc, just get TO it!" Sarah said. "Certainly. Ahem. Starting with the master unit, then." Dr. Science moved over to stand beside Mike. Each of the Bahamodes was larger than the standard Bahamode, undoubtedly to provide space for the transformation equipment. All except Mike's were about 150% of the normal Bahamode size, and the black one in the center which Mike had been told was his was all of TWICE as large as his old one. And considering that the original Bahamode compared favorably with a VW Bug as far as size was concerned, this was saying a great deal! "Even though Mike's Bahamode is the master control unit," Dr. Science explained, "each of the individual units have override controls. Even Spectrum will have a set. So, if Mike becomes incapacitated, the person in, for example, the left foot (or any other appendage, for that matter) should be able to assume control of the entire unit to get it out of danger. "However, you should not assume that you HAVE to stay within your mecha once it has merged. During the transformation process, or at any time afterward, you may operate the ejection system, and engage the enemy separately. Your absense will not handicap Bahamode Sigma in any way." He paused. "This does not include you, by the way, Spectrum." "Of course not." Spectrum nodded. "Go on, doc." "In addition to override controls, each unit has been designed with a certain specific function. This function can be accessed from any of the units, but has been designed with that specific unit's operator in mind." "Like what?" Mike asked. "Let's start off with the function of mine, then." "Simple," Dr. Science said. "Yours is Master Control. In Sigma mode, you will have at your fingertips the most comprehensive control systems of any of the Sigma mecha. You will control each arm and leg unit as if it were part of your original Bahamode, unless the operator of that arm or leg overrides you." "Wow. I had trouble just learning to use my original Bahamode," Mike said. "I hope I can operate this thing okay." "Don't worry, brother, I'll help you," Summer said with a grin. "What about me?" Spectrum asked. "What do I do? Just sit there like a living Energizer battery?" "Certainly not!" Dr. Science said. "You have a very important task; I modified the controls for you. In addition to providing power for the Sigma's primary weapon systems, you will also be in charge of generating defensive fields to help block attacks. It's an experimental system--in fact, the entire UNIT is experimental--but I have managed to design a sort of a force field generator, that will theoretically amplify your own energy field-generating abilities to provide protection for the whole Sigma battloid." He shrugged. "It should be good for two, three hits before it blows out." "Wonderful," Spectrum muttered. "And I do have a complete control set?" "Absolutely," Dr. Science replied. "Rudimentary, but still complete." "Back to my mecha," Mike reminded Dr. Science. "Anything else?" "Well...in standard Bahamode battloid mode, it acts as a C-cubed center for forces in the field...that's about it." "What about the control system?" Mike asked. "You never were too specific about how you were going to work it." "The helmets in the CVR-3 body armor you will be wearing into combat in the Sigma units have augmented mental receptors," Dr. Science replied. "Theoretically, you should be able to maneuver the mecha much more easily than with hand-controls alone." "Okay..." Mike said. "What about weapons systems?" "Mike, your Bahamode is equipped with dual energy cannons on the arms. In Sigma mode, these weapons will become part of the energy uplink system to the Sigma's arms. There are also minimissile packs in the chest, and your jumpjets have been augmented for extended flights. Oh, and you carry the standard 25mm machine rifle." Mike nodded, looking closer at the gleaming black command Bahamode. "Hey, Dr. Science, what's this?" He flipped open an access panel and turned the handle within it. Part of the area behind the Bahamode's seat slid back, revealing a folded-up Cyclone cycle. "A mechabike with a mechabike built in? Keen!" "Er, yes. That is your emergency escape vehicle, and an integral part of the Sigma design." "So THAT'S why we're going into these things in CVR," Adam realized. "Neat!" "Yes, and there are other factors involved as well, but we won't touch on them now. Moving on to Adam's bike, the green one--" "Matches my Cyclone," Adam observed. "Yes, that was the general idea. Your Bahamode will form the right arm of the Sigma unit. I have equipped it with a heavy-duty plasma flamethrower unit as the primary weapon, with minimissile packs in the arms. In Sigma mode, weapon components from all five mecha will combine to form a larger fusion cannon gun pod, which will usually be wielded by your mecha's 'hand'." "Cool beans," Adam said. "Then I take it my mech's function is weapons?" "Absolutely. You will have override control over the weapon systems in all units, as well as targeting and firing command. You will act as gunner for the unit to relieve Mike of some of his workload." "Hey, where do I sign?" "Moving on to Sarah Conner, whose red Bahamode forms the left arm." "I'm all ears, doc." Sarah straddled her bike and grinned. "Your unit's primary weapon is its speed. It is a good 20% faster than any of the other Sigma units, including Mike's. Armament includes the standard 25mm rifle, beam saber, and minimissile packs in the arms and chest. In Sigma mode, you will coordinate hand-to-hand combat and defense, outlining possible strategies for Mike and executing them if he gives you the go-ahead." "Anything else I need to know?" Sarah asked. "If so, I'm certain you'll figure it out on your own." He turned to Link. "Now, your Bahamode, the light blue one, is relatively lightly armed, with only the standard gunpod and beam saber. However, it has some extensive computer, communication, and ECM gear built into it." "Let me guess. My Bahamode's design specialty is electronic countermeasures and communication, right?" Link asked. "Exactly." Dr. Science nodded. "And whose is that grey one over there?" Mike pointed to the remaining bike, which didn't have anyone standing beside it. Dr. Science stepped over to it, then stunned them all by saying, "This one? This one is mine." "What?!" Mike asked. "No way! You're not going into combat with us!" "Why not? Do you think I am not capable?" Dr. Science asked, drawing himself up to his full height. "I have been logging a great deal of simulator time, and while I will admit that I am not as good at combat as you or Adam, I am still competent." "But--you're our SCIENTIST! You're not a front-line soldier, you're support!" "I will be supporting you best by operating the customized sensor systems in the grey Bahamode. These sensors are fine-tuned and can best be utilized by myself, and myself only." "What about Ray Ster--" "You need his Alpha's extra firepower for support in this battle," Dr. Science interrupted. "Face it. There is no one else who is even remotely qualified to operate this machine. Besides, with the sensors I have installed in operation, I will be able to detect critical stress points and coordinate with Adam to hit the enemy in the most crucial locations." "What's your bike armed with, then?" "Machine rifle, minimissiles--standard armaments." "I see." Mike shrugged. "I guess it's too late to do anything else, so you're in, doc, at least for now. Come on, let's load 'em up and get going! We've got a city to save!" WILL TEAM M.E.C.H.A. AND SPECTRUM SAVE THE CITY? OR WILL THEY SIMPLY DAMAGE IT FURTHER? WHAT ABOUT THE "ARMOR AVENGER"? WHAT ABOUT CLYDE, SPACE MOOSE, ET AL? WHAT ABOUT ZEN NAVIGATOR AND CRAPSHOOT? ARE THEY GOING TO COME INTO THIS THING AT ALL? WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN BAHAMODE SIGMA FACES OFF WITH ROOSTER D. STRUCTOID? IT'S ANIME-BASED HIGH ADVENTURE, COMING UP ON THIS THEATRE OF THE MIND: S / U / P / E / R / G / U / Y -- Chris Meadows | Robotech_Master's First Law of Superguy: CHM173S@NIC.SMSU.EDU | Continuity is Overrated. CMEADOWS@NYX.CS.DU.EDU | Robotech_Master's Corollary: ...but sometimes CMEADOWS@NOX.CS.DU.EDU | necessary all the same. ========================================================================= Date: Fri, 11 Feb 1994 22:21:27 EST Reply-To: UCF SUPERGUY List Sender: UCF SUPERGUY List From: Jesse Taylor Subject: SG: RidiculousSize Bob-City MegaCrossover #4 (yay!) BOB CITY MEGA-CROSSOVER #4 OR MARIE #4 SPECIAL GUEST STARS: Space Moose and the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers WITH APPEARANCES BY: Clyde, Benedict, Crapshoot, Zen Navigator, Fuzzy Bunny, Captain Non Sequitor, Bulletproof, Dr. Cheef and two guys with Bachelor's Degrees... "Master's Degrees..." "...in...SCIENCE!" <-----> Rooster D. Structoid stood near the fallen parking garage, its weapons aimed at Clyde, who was pinned underneath. "You shoulda stayed in your swimmin' hole, you pink freak. The boys an' I had a job ta do here, an' you got in the way..." Super Chick growled, her voice sounding most decidedly evil over the external speakers. "Yuuup," Reaper chimed in, "an' now we're a-gonna do a joab on you!" "Shut up!" Super Chick snapped, "This isn't a time for jokes! This..." "THIS LOOKS LIKE A JOB FOR...SPAAAAAAAAAAACE MOOOOOOOOOOOSE!!" "Whuut?!" Rooster D. Structoid pivoted to behold the incoming Antlers of Steel. Space Moose had actually had enough cognitive ability to release Marie before beginning his super-sonic dive-bombing attack on the Rooster, but her flight pack was still on, so she was tumbling around in Space Moose's wake. "Whooof!" the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers chorused, as Space Moose slammed into the chest of Rooster D. Structoid, knocking it into the Bob City camping supply store (Best Backpacks in Bob). "WUAAH!" Marie yelled, slamming into the ground nearby. Her flight pack sputtered for a moment, then cut off. Space Moose bellowed with rage, pounding the armored chest of the Rooster. The mech's massive head craned down to look at him. "Get...him...OFF!" Superchick yelled. Rooster's thresher-arm slammed into the Heroic Herbivore, sending him flying through several buildings. Marie shook her head to clear it and stood up, unslinging her massive cannon. She sized up the Rooster, which was now getting to its feet. Marie suddenly realized how small she was in relation to it... <-----> "Wh?" Anime Freak grumbled, stumbling into the monitor room of the Grey October. "Why'd y' w'k me up?" "Look at this!!" Tris yelled, pointing at the monitor that displayed Marie's helmet-camera footage. Anime Freak's jaw dropped as he stared at the slow pan up the massive height of Rooster D. Structoid. "Engage command overrides!" Anime Freak barked, sending the technical staff scurrying to their stations. "Get her out of there-- she'll be killed!!" "Command overrides..." Tris said thoughtfully. "Damn! I knew we forgot something..." "WHAT?!" <-----> "Surrender, villains!" Marie yelled, aiming her cannon at the Rooster's chest. The Rooster looked around for a while before finally noticing Marie down at its feet. "Heh. Yeah, right. Die!" Superchick said, trying to stomp Marie. Marie rolled to the side and got to her feet, drawing a bead on the Rooster's head. As she pulled the trigger, she realized she wasn't sure exactly what her main gun was... <-----> Now, when the TONN R&D crew was designing the Tornado armor suits, they were at a loss about a heavy weapon to give the Tornado...So they pulled out one that was already battle-tested. Unfortunately, it was an RJ-11 series Light Railgun, which was intended for use in starfighters... Contrary to popular belief, the principle of equal and opposite reactions means that railguns are *not* recoilless. In starfighters, the recoil is compensated for, but Marie had no such luck. So, when the RJ-11 spat out a 3.5lb Ferro-titanium shell moving at approximately Mach 7, Marie was hurled in the opposite direction at close to 300 mph. Can you say 'aiiee'? <-----> BWRAM!, said the gun. "UWAAAAAAH!" said Marie. "CRAP!" yelled Superchick, as the shell creased the side of the Rooster's head in passing. Marie lost her grip on the gun as she tumbled backwards, eventually smashing into an outpost of the Gap. "TORNADO!" Space Moose bellowed, smashing back through the same buildings the Rooster had slammed him through just a moment ago. "Are you all right?!" Unfortunately, he put on a bit too much speed, and went flying across the street and into a lingerie store. Moments later, he stepped forth, his antlers adorned with...ehm...well, you know... "BWAHAHA!" Superchick yelled. The Rooster shook as the Grangers began laughing at Space Moose. "He's gaot underwear on 'is heed!" Hellhound chuckled. "What's so funny?!" the Moosely Warrior said, looking around in confusion. Nearby, Marie was rolling on the ground laughing. The Moose shook his head, dislodging a brassiere, which fell over his eyes. The Rooster sat backwards, creating a small earthquake, not to mention a sizable crater. Marie managed to sit up, but then spotted Space Moose and collapsed laughing again. "What?!" Space Moose said, beginning to get annoyed, "What is so *funny*?!" Space Moose shook his head hard, dislodging several women's' undergarment items. Marie was finally able to stop laughing long enough to get to her feet, and she began looking for her gun. As the Antlers of Steel dove in for another attack on the Grangers, Marie noticed Clyde pinned beneath the collapsed parking garage. "Gotta...stop...bad guys..." Clyde mumbled, weakly shifting the rubble atop him. "Gotta...be...a hero..." Marie stared in horror--this creature had tried to be a hero-- just like she was trying--and look what had happened... "Space Moose!!" she yelled, "Get over here!!" "What?" the Heroic Herbivore answered, turning from his confrontation with the Grangers. The Grangers capitalized on this by punching him with the Hellhound-arm of the Rooster, sending Space Moose flying into Marie. "We're got them now!" Superchick said, "Now crush them, before they free that yucky sushi friend of theirs!" "Whuud she say?" Bull asked. "Kill them!" Reaper clarified. "Oh. Yuh." "Egad!" Space Moose exclaimed, "Clyde!!" "We've got to get him to safety!" Marie said, "He's hurt bad--he could die!" "We cannot retreat!" Space Moose said nobly, "We cannot allow these villains to run rampant in this...this...er..." "Wet?" "Wet City of Bob!" Space Moose continued in a dramatic tone of voice, "I must..." "You must lift this stupid building off him!" Marie shouted, getting angry, "We can't leave him here!" Space Moose blinked. "You are right," he said, gripping the largest piece of rubble and pulling upwards, creating enough space for Marie to pull Clyde out. Marie grabbed the end of a tentacle and heaved with all her strength, somehow managing to get Clyde out from under the rubble. "Die!" Superchick yelled. "Whuut?" "Shut up!" "Ayuh." "Where was I?" Superchick wondered, staring down at the three heroes from her seat in the head of the Rooster. "Uhm...I think you had just yelled, 'Die'.," Marie shouted up. "Right...DIE!" "Yeek!" Marie said, as the Rooster tried to stomp her in the ground. Space Moose leaped upwards, grabbing Rooster D. Structoid and literally lifting it into the air. Reaper swung the Thresher arm and knocked Space Moose off again. Space Moose flew up to resume the attack, and met the full force of the Rooster's Main Gun right on his chest. The impact slammed him from the sky, and into the ground near Marie and Clyde. "Space Moose!!" Marie yelled, as Space Moose hauled himself out of the impact crater he had made. His costume had been completely blasted away from his chest, revealing rather singed fur. The Antlers of Steel was bleeding in several places. Now he was the very definition of 'pissed off'. "We've got to get out of here! This thing's too much!!" "No!" Space Moose bellowed, "Tornado, get Clyde to safety! I will cover your escape!!" "s'ok..." Clyde mumbled, trying to get to his...uh...tentacles, "I'm...f'ne..." "You can't take this thing! Hell(tm), all of us together can't!" Space Moose glared at Marie. "I can handle this! Go!!" "The hell you say!" Marie yelled, pulling an Uzi from her butt- pack. "Give me a boost, I'll get in close and do some damage." There was a brief pause as the HellFire flamethrowers in her wrist units and the close combat systems activated. The booster jets sputtered, but she had exhausted their fuel on the flight into Bob City, which saved her from becoming the first Invid to orbit the Earth. Space Moose looked surprised, then nodded, lifted Marie with one hand and tossed her at the head of the Rooster. The Grangers, distracted with trying to stomp Space Moose--which they did a moment later-- failed to notice Marie, who grabbed onto the outside of a hatch which had been damaged earlier by her railgun shot. Using her armor's strength enhancement, she ripped it loose, and peered in. "H-how'd you g-get in here?!" Superchick gulped, staring at her. "I made my own door..." Marie grinned, raising her Uzi and flipping on the laser sight with her thumb. The dot centered on Superchick's forehead. Marie began to squeeze the trigger...and paused. 'Heroes don't kill...', she said to herself, 'But if I don't kill her, we'll lose...But if I do, what will the victory be worth? Spectrum's a hero--he wouldn't kill people! And he wouldn't want me to, either...' "GET HER OFF!" Superchick screamed. Hellhound brought up his arm of the Rooster, and clamped its dog-like jaws around Marie. Marie screamed, accidentally firing into the cockpit. The shots sent sparks from the control panels, but missed Superchick. "TORNADO!" Space Moose yelled, launching himself with renewed fury at the Structoid. He slammed into the Rooster's chest again, propelling it backwards. The flailing Thresher arm utterly annihilated Eric's House O' Scotch (Best Booze in Bob), but the Hellhound arm held tight to Marie. Marie emptied off the remaining rounds in her Uzi, doing no noticeable damage to the Hellhound. Her left arm was pinned in the jaws-- she felt searing pain as one of the teeth punched through her armor. Her Invid training utterly failed her and she panicked, flailing helplessly against the massive machine that held her fast. Space Moose heard Marie scream and focused his attention on the Hellhound arm--he pried the jaws open and extricated Marie. The Grangers rallied, slamming Space Moose back and forcing him to drop Marie. Marie didn't fall all that far, and she struggled to get up as the Rooster advanced on her. [Visual aid--Watch the sequence in The Empire Strikes Back where the AT-AT walker is about to turn Luke into Jedi Jell-O.] "gotta...get up..." Marie said, trying to get up. Her left arm was numb and bleeding. The huge right foot of the Rooster slammed down just a few hundred meters from her. She suddenly came to a realization that she might not survive. One more step and the Rooster would flatten her... "My god..." Anime Freak said, staring at the monitor screen, "That thing's gonna crush her!" "TORNADO!!" Space Moose bellowed, swooping down. He braced himself under the descending foot of Rooster D. Structoid and pushed up with all his Moosely Might. "you...need'ta...get...new lines.," Marie groaned, hauling herself to her feet. "Get out from underneath!!" Space Moose said through gritted teeth, "I...I can't hold it!!" Marie staggered out from underneath the huge foot, and Space Moose only barely managed to get out from underneath it himself before it slammed into the ground, creating a massive footprint. Space Moose was nearing the limits of even his Moosely Endurance, and the Grangers connected with another blow before he could recover. The Antlers of Steel went flying back into a Bob City Budweiser tanker truck (Best Beer in Bob). Staggering to his feet, he saw Marie facing down the Structoid with only a pair of .45 pistols from her butt-pack. "Tornado is a true heroine..." Space Moose said, struggling to his feet, "True to the last! I cannot allow one so heroic to come to such an untimely end...But these villains are too strong for even my Moosely Might...If only I had some way to distract..." Space Moose turned around, to see the tanker truck. A large light bulb appeared over his head. "Tornado!! Come over here, I've got a plan!!" *PUNT!* "Whooulf!" Marie said, the Grangers' punt sending her flying through the air and into Space Moose, knocking him down. The Grangers chuckled and advanced. "Tornado, can you cut a hole in the truck?!" "Why y'want tha'?" Marie responded dizzily. "I gaw' a couple chainsaws...Oooh, lookie!" Space Moose grabbed Marie's right arm, from which a spinning chainsaw blade had extended, and guided it to the side of the tanker truck. Within moments, there was a sizable hole. "Now, villains, taste...beer!" the Heroic Herbivore bellowed, lifting the tanker truck and heaving it into the air. He flew over the hatch that Marie had ripped open, and poured the entire contents into the massive Structoid mech. Within seconds, the beer had spread to all the cockpits, and filled the entire mech. The Grangers' reactions were mixed. 'Whaaat?!' thought Superchick. 'Beer?!' thought Reaper. 'I hate Bud!' thought Hellhound. 'Whuut is goin' on?!' thought Bull. 'Urp,' thought Mule. "That should distract them!" Space Moose said, lifting Marie and Clyde, who had shrunk down to his small form for easy transport. "Come! We have a great deal to do!" <-----> "Come on, Zen, admit it! You have no idea where we are!" Chance E. Vennt, aka Crapshoot, said in an annoyed tone of voice. He and his traveling companion, Zen Navigator, were stopped at a 7-11 to snag some munchies and a map. "I know exactly where we are!" Zen Navigator said, "I am...Zen NAAAAVIGATOR!" "Ok then..." Chance said, flipping through the map section, "Where are we?" "Umm...Bob City?" Zen said. "*Where* in Bob City?" Zen blinked, and peered outside. "The place where it rains?" he said. Chance rolled his eyes. "Ok, ok, I can't find a map--we'll just have to Zen it..." "Yay!" "...sigh." The two walked outside, toting their bags of munchies. "Hey!" Chance suddenly exclaimed, "Look at that!" "It's a cartoon rabbit," Zen said, "So?" "You mean you see cartoon rabbits all the time?" Chance said, raising an eyebrow. "No--when I was with the Doctor, we saw some *really* weird stuff on Planet BBC..." Chance opened his mouth to say something, but decided against it. "Hey! You!" the rabbit said, "Wanna buy a paper? Bob City Tribune (Best Ballyhoo in Bob)--Hot off the presses!" "Maybe this can show us some crime to stop--maybe I'll get to fight it in costume this time!" Chance grinned. "Yeah, I'll take one." "Ten bucks." "WHAT?!" Chance screamed, "TEN BUCKS FOR A PAPER?!" "Ok, ok. Eight. Sheesh, some people..." "Hmph. Ok, I'll take it.," Chance grumbled, fishing in his pocket for some money. "Who are you, anyway?" "Call me...(drumroll) Fuzzy Bunny!" Chance blinked. "Er...right." He glanced over the front page, then opened up the paper. [Audience view--the cover of the paper reads 'Villain Group Devastates Downtown Bob'.] Chance paused, and his eyes widened, then he flipped the paper closed and read the front page article. "A villain group, calling themselves the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers, has robbed several banks and has beaten off Spectrum and Team M.E.C.H.A.! As this article is being written, the Grangers are fighting Space Moose and an unidentified hero on 42nd street..." "Wow!" Fuzzy said, "Keen!" "Hey!" someone yelled from nearby, "Who took all my papers!!" "Whups!" Fuzzy gulped, "Gotta bail! See you guys around!" Chance looked at Zen, who shrugged. "Come on, Zen, let's go! I'll find my costume, and we can help fight these guys!" "My Zen Navigational abilities shall ensure we get there in mere minutes!" Zen said dramatically, leaping into the driver's seat of his Psychedelic VW Minivan. "Oh...I'll take my time changing, then..." "Right!" Zen said, then paused. "Hey!" <-----> "Doctors!" Space Moose said, stepping into the Bob City General Hospital (Best Bandages in Bob), "My comrade here requires medical assistance!!" The Doctors gaped at Space Moose, whose costume was torn in many places, and who was bleeding from several wounds in his chest, and then at Marie, who was bandaging her left arm, which was bleeding... "Green blood!" one of the doctors gasped. Marie glared at him, and hurriedly bandaged the rest of her arm. If Space Moose noticed, he gave no sign. "We'll get a burn treatment unit over here..." one of the Doctors said, examining the burns on Space Moose's chest. "Just sit still and..." "No! I don't have time!" Space Moose said, spotting a free stretcher and gently placing Clyde on it. "My friend here requires assistance--I do not! I have a city to save!" "Huh?" a doctor said, "What the hell(tm) are we supposed to do, give it an ink transfusion?!" Marie's HellFire flamethrowers, hearing the command word to activate, sent blasts of flame through the hospital waiting room, lighting the stacks of insanely out-of-date magazines on fire. "Oops!" Marie said. "This is my friend Clyde," Space Moose explained, "He was injured defending this city! He requires medical aid!" "Right, we'll see what we can do," one of the head doctors said, silencing the others. "Your friend will be in good hands--you concentrate on saving the city." Space Moose nodded. "Come, Tornado, we have work to do! Say, where did these fires come from?" "Eh heh...We've got to be going now..." Marie said, smiled innocently. As Space Moose and Tornado departed, one of the younger doctors spoke up. "It's a *squid*, a big piece of sushi! We're wasting our time!" "Do you know who that was?" the head doctor replied. "No." "That was Space Moose." "Eep!" the younger doctor said. "I'll call the Bob City Oceanographic Center (Best Bathyspheres in Bob) and have them send someone over right away!" "Right--This 'Clyde' had better recover, we've seen the news reports of Space Moose trying to be helpful, we do *not* want to make him mad!" <-----> "Superchick, report!" Dr. Pseudo Science said into a communications link. "What is your status?" "(hic) Waaash thaat?" "Superchick?" Pseudo asked, "Are you drunk?" "I'm naaawt drunk...(hic!) Whaat ya need?" "Get back here before those heroes get back!" "Naooow..." "What?" "That was a slurred 'no', you idiot," Pseudo's brother, Weird Science, said, from where he was fiddling with some scientific doo-dads. "Superchick, we're your employers--you will *listen* when we tell you to do things!" "Go [*CENSORED*] yourshelf!" Superchick slurred. "Do what to my shelves?" Pseudo asked, confused. "We're onn our ownn, now..." Reaper chipped in, "We don' need you two lewshersh..." "But...but...!" "Our combined powers make us more than a match for any who would dare oppose us," Mule said, in precise, scholarly tones. "Like, wha' he shaid..." Bull commented. "'bye now!" *CLICK* Pseudo and Weird stared at each other in shock. "They may come for us, next," Weird said, producing some duffel bags from under his lab coat and shoveling delicate scientific gear into them. "Right," Pseudo said, "ZU111, report your status in capturing the MooseWing." Pseudo got the fun experience of listening to static. "ZU111? Er... Any Zoomers, report! ZU666? ZU&&&?" Pseudo and Weird stared at each other in renewed horror. "We've got to get out of here!" Pseudo screamed. The two scientists panicked, grabbing all the gear they could and running out the door. Dr. Cheef followed them out. "Wait! What am I supposed to do?!" he shouted. As if in reply, Captain Non-Sequitor swooped down from the skies and coated the two fleeing scientists in a thick layer of cabbage- flavored ice cream. "Aaargh!" Cheef shouted, "I can't take it anymore!" He ran inside, grabbed some gear and a bag of money from one of the Grangers' earlier robberies, and hurried outside, flagging down a cab. "No more plans! No more superheroes!! I'm getting out of here! Somewhere nice and safe!! Like Nepal..." <-----> Space Moose touched down outside the Large Airport Hangar(tm), and set Marie down. "Benedict!" he called out. The grounds outside the hangar looked like a war zone--there was a good reason for this, as anyone who read Crossover #2 will know. The Airport firemen had just finished dousing the multiple fires and were now getting back to washing the tartar sauce off the runway. "Benedict?!" Inside, the lemurs looked up from examining the navigational computer. Components for said system were strewn around the inside of the cockpit of the MooseWing. "Ptang!" one of them remarked, "Frinkptang!" "Frink! Ptangfrink!" said another. The three lemurs scurried away, but one of them got a bit of its fur caught on a loose screw. Not having time to untangle itself, it ripped loose and scurried after its companions, leaving a small bundle of lemur hair caught on an extruding bit of metal... "Hm," Space Moose said, "The MooseWing is still here, but Benedict isn't...I guess he must have gone to get his shell waxed...Come, Tornado, I have a plan, but I'll need your help..." <-----> "Hrmph," Ha'Veluri growled, slouching in a large black trenchcoat. He was soaked to the bone, and extremely unhappy. Sighing, he paced back and forth in Dead End Alley, waiting for his contact. "Hey," a dark figure said from the shadows. "You that Veluri guy?" "Yes. You've got the Plutonium?" "Yep," the figure replied. "You have the money?" Ha'Veluri nodded. "$300,000 in Earth currency. This had better be pure Plutonium, or I'll hunt you down and cut out your liver." The figure seemed rather nonplused. "Err...right. Here you go." Ha'Veluri accepted the heavy lead case, exchanging it for a large garbage bag full of $10 bills. (So it was a Hefty Cinch-Sack(tm), ok?!). "Pleasure doin' business with you..." the figure said, bowing and disappearing into the shadows. "That certainly was film noir-ish.," Ha'Veluri muttered, walking out into the street. What he saw amazed him. There was a large mech, looking vaguely like a rooster, staggering down the street drunkenly, and occasionally crushing a building by accident. A loud song echoed from the mech's external speakers, shaking the windows of the remaining buildings. "Awllllld Maac'Dooooonald haaaad a faaaaarm..." Ha'Veluri buried his head in his hands and whimpered quietly. "I can't take this planet anymore! I'm going to go insane!!" <-----> In the Large Airport Hangar, Marie was peering at the wrecked MooseWing. It had the air somewhat like that of a totaled Ferrari, being that of something that used to be awesome, but was now only so much scrap. Space Moose was thinking that it looked worse than when he and Benedict had started working on it. The two heroes got to work, Space Moose opening up one of the access panels and peering inside. Marie found some burn ointment in her butt-pack, and began spreading it on the Heroic Herbivore's chest wound. "Could you hand me that arc welder?" Space Moose asked, pulling a bundle of wires from the MooseWing, peering at them, and tossing them back inside. "Right," Marie said. Her battle-suit inexplicably extended a right-turn signal, which began flashing. Marie found the welder and handed it to the Heroic Herbivore, then went back to applying burn ointment on the Moosely Chest(tm!) of the Antlers of Steel. Marie peered at the strange hero who had, just a half an hour earlier, saved her life. She had faced death before, but never defending someone else... Was this what heroes did? Continually risk their lives...for what? A few moments of peace, before the next evil scourge arose? Marie shook her head, making a mental note to ask Spectrum about it. "Ah! The computer works, now!" Space Moose said. Marie blinked, wondering why the Moosely Hero had needed an arc welder to work on a computer. "Here is my plan for what we will build to defeat those villains!" "What is it?" Marie asked, as Space Moose called an odd design up on a monitor. "I call it...The MooseMech!" Space Moose said dramatically. Marie looked unimpressed. "That has to be..." Marie said, trailing off. Space Moose had risked his life for her, which implied trust...He was her best opportunity to get in touch with Spectrum... "...the, uh, best idea I've, uh, ever heard of!" "Really?" Space Moose said, "Oh! I mean, of course! Now, I'll finish the repairs, you go find us a 747!" "A *what*?!" "A jet plane, you know, the really big ones." Marie slapped her forehead. "Right, I'll get on it..." <-----> "Did you make sure the monitors were recording?" Anime Freak said, "Footage of the inside of the MooseWing! Amazing!" "Uh...we've got problems..." Tris said, from another monitor. "Look at this satellite overview of Bob City...Here's the path of the Grangers..." "Uh...so?" "They're headed right for TONN's Bob City bureau!!" <-----> "Wayne!" Marie yelled into her communicator. "Wayne, I know you can hear me..." {Like, whoa, babe! Whassup?}, came the reply. "Wayne, I need your help..." {What's up?} "Just come to the Bob City General Airport (Best Boeings in Bob)... You're not going to believe this..." <-----> As Rooster D. Structoid neared the Bob City bureau of TONN--That Other News Network--dozens of TONN security troops poured out, moving cars to form a barricade across the street. "Halt!" their leader yelled into a loudspeaker, "Do not come any further!" "I do not believe that threat holds any weight," responded Mule. He and Reaper were the only members of the Grangers who remained conscious-- the others had already passed out. "Whuut?" replied Reaper. "If you do not leave immediately, we will be forced to destroy you!" "Heh," Reaper said, "You jusht try dat, heh..." "Right...FIRE!" the TONN commander yelled. His troops opened up with rifles and machine-guns, doing little noticeable damage to the Structoid. Reaper somehow located the controls for the main gun and opened fire, blowing a large hole in the center of the troopers' lines. As the Rooster staggered forward, the street behind it split and opened, revealing an elevator, which rose up, bringing its cargo, and Invid Shock Trooper, to the surface. The Trooper's twin shoulder-mounted cannons spat forth twin streams of annihilation disks, knocking the Rooster forward onto its knees. <-----> "So that's what happened," Marie said, having just finished explaining to Wayne the events of her and Space Moose's battle with the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers. "So, like, what do you want, like, me to, like, do?" Wayne asked. Nearby, his two Armored Scout henchmen were poking through the rubble of Benedict's battle. One of them uncovered a tin of Spam, and opened fire for no readily discernible reason. The Spam was not harmed. "See that thing over there?" Marie said, pointing at a nearby parked 747. "Get one for me." <-----> "Ah," Sanka said, as he and Burnout drove through the remarkably rubble-strewn roads of Bob City. "Just like home..." "Are you referring to the rubble or the rain?" Burnout asked. "We don't have time to reminisce, here...I just want to see if we can get into the Bob City bureau of TONN, and then we've got to head back to base." "Hey...isn't that a fire up ahead?" Sanka said, peering through the dense fog and rain. "Speed up!" Burnout said, "It's coming from the TONN bureau!" <-----> "No, Wayne!" Marie yelled, "When I said 'get', I did *not* mean *destroy*!!" "Whups," Wayne said, peering at the burning hulk that had been a 747. "Uh..." "I'll get one, ok?" Marie grumped. "You and your two buddies round up all the airport vehicles you can find and herd them over to that hangar over there--and *don't* let Space Moose see you, ok?" "Righty-o!" Wayne grinned. <-----> Rooster D. Structoid struggled to its feet and then dropped back to its knees, as the Invid Shock Trooper continued to pour heavy fire into it. Reaper was sobered up enough by this threat to flail around behind the Rooster with the Thresher-arm of the giant mech, scoring a blow on the Trooper and knocking it backwards. The TONN security forces had upgraded their armaments at the Bob City Gun Shop across the street (Best Ballistics in Bob) and were now sporting bazookas and grenade launchers. Mule woke Hellhound up for long enough to have that arm of the Structoid launch a blast of fire, incinerating most of the remaining troops. The Shock Trooper renewed its assault, but this time Reaper pounded it into the pavement with his Thresher arm. The two awake Grangers hauled the mech to its feet, and simply walked over the remaining troops. Reaper then proceeded to smash the TONN bureau. A flickering energy shield appeared for a moment, but was overloaded by the force of Reapers' blows. Laser cannon turrets emerged from the roof and opened fire, but Reaper ignored them, ripping away at the superstructure of the building. He ripped the broadcast antenna free and used it as a hammer to crush everything he saw. Finally all the defenses failed and all the guns fell silent. "Ah feel much better nayw," Reaper said, "Ayuh." "Your destructive streak may get us into trouble, eventually, you neolithic fool," Mule said, in an annoyed tone of voice. "Oh, by the way, I have done a few calculations, and now have a way to totally destroy that idiot Space Moose." "Whuut?" Reaper replied, scratching his head. "*sigh*, never mind..." <-----> Marie sat in the pilots' seat of the 747, playing with the controls. If this vehicle followed the pattern of other Earther vehicles, she thought, there'll be an accelerator...Aha! She found a couple levers, shrugged, and pushed them all forwards. The plane shuddered, and began to move, then to pick up speed. Marie turned the wheel, urging the plane towards the hangar where Space Moose was working. She'd park it right out front--maybe score some points for driving skill...The more she impressed the Moronic Moose, the better he would describe her to Spectrum. Marie saw the hangar approaching rapidly, and the small army of vehicles that Wayne and his henchmen had herded over thus far. She made a few minor heading adjustments, and began looking for the brake. And couldn't find it. "Uhh...AIIIIIEEE!" Marie yelled, as the 747 plowed through the assembled vehicles, and headed off towards Bob City. Marie jumped out and began walking back towards the next 747 in line. <-----> "We have been driving forever!" Chance shouted, "We have no idea where we are! I might as well change back to my normal clothes, I'm never going to get a chance to fight those Power Rangers, or whoever they are..." As Chance finished changing out of his costume, Zen abruptly stopped the minibus. "Get out, alla youse," Chance heard. The door opened, and a thug (wearing a 'Hi, I'm Thug #7' t-shirt) pointed a gun at him and motioned for him to get out. Another Thug (Thug #8) covered Zen. "Give us yer money an' yer car keys..." "Aw no..." Chance whined, "Why can't I ever be in costume?! Why?! WHY?!" "Shaddup and hand 'em over!" Thug #8 said. "Surrender now..." Chance said in a low voice, "...before I exterminate you like the pests you are..." "Oooh, nice line!" Zen said. The thugs chuckled. "Oh yeah? What'cha gonna do, make some'tin fall outta da sky on us?" "I believe the chance of that..." Chance said, peering up. "AAAAAAAAA!" a salt-shaker-shaped (say that three times fast) body said, falling from the sky and crushing the two thugs. "...is 100%." "A Dalek!" Zen said. "How do you know that?!" Chance asked. "You have to know these things when you are...Zen NAAAAAAVIGATOR!" Zen said. Chance rolled his eyes. "Dys-func-tion!" Benedict (how many other Daleks are there in Bob City? Huh?!) said, "Dys-func-tion! Watch that last step, it is a doo- zy..." "What happened to you?!" Chance asked, peering at the massive gouges in Benedict's armored form. "I was att-acked by sev-er-al ro-bot-ic crea-tures," Benedict said, "I...Space Moose! I must lo-cate Space Moose!" "Maybe Zen can help you..." Chance said sarcastically. "Why not...I *am*, after all, Zen NAAAAAVIGATOR!" "This is go-ing to be a loooooong day..." Benedict muttered. "What?" "Noth-ing." "Do you know anything about this group of villains who're running wild in downtown Bob?" Chance asked. "Vill-ains?" Benedict said, looking perturbed, "That must have been what Space Moose sensed! I must loc-ate! You will acc-omp-an-y me! We must loc-ate Space Moose! Seek!! Loc-ate!! SEEK!!! LO-CATE!!!" Benedict, who had a Global Positioning System, located Downtown Bob on his on-line map and headed off. "YES!" Chance shouted, "Zen, follow that Dalek! I've got to get in costume!!" <-----> "Space Moose!" Marie called into the hangar. Space Moose stepped out. "Excellent!" he bellowed, "You got a 747! And...all these vehicles, too!" Space Moose peered in amazement at the hundreds of airport vehicles that had been rounded up and were now parked outside the hangar. "I just hope you don't need another one..." Marie muttered, looking innocent. "Where did those pillars of smoke come from?" Space Moose asked, peering at the seven or so 747 wrecks that littered the airfield. Marie shrugged. She had sent three more off in the direction of Bob City before she figured out the brakes, and destroyed six before she finally stopped running into buildings and managed to stop in front of the hangar. "Let me just rest for a moment..." Marie said. Space Moose nodded, picked up a fire-truck, and disappeared into the hangar. Marie removed the left arm of her battlesuit, and peered at the bandage on her left arm. It had bled a lot--she still felt faint--and who knew what yucky Earth diseases she might get with a wound like this...Her battlesuit was apparently self-repairing, because the gash in the left arm was already starting to fix itself. "Whoa, bogus!" Wayne said, coming out from hiding behind one of the trucks. "Like, the Grangers did that to, like, you?" Marie nodded. "Like, I can't understand why you would, like, risk your life, just to, like, meet this Spectrum guy..." "You're right, Wayne.," Marie said, "You can't understand. Thanks for your help with the vehicles, but you shouldn't be seen with me-- everyone associates Invid with evil--that's the whole reason for this 'Tornado' deal..." Wayne glared. "Too 'good' to hang out with your own, like, kind now, huhn? Just remember--old moose-head may be your friend now, but when he finds out you were one of the people tryin' to kill him in Springfield, I guarantee he'll change real fast. Same goes for this Spectrum you're so keen on...Remember who your friends are, Marie." Marie looked stunned. "Whoa, Wayne, you managed to get off a whole paragraph without saying 'like' more than once!! You were actually coherent!!" "Like, I was, like, stepping out of, like, character for a, like, minute... Just, like, ponder on it, like, y'know?" Marie blinked as Wayne stormed off. What if he was right?! What would happen?! Where would she go, then?! "Marie!" Space Moose called from inside. "Help me with the MooseWing! We've got to move it outside..." "Coming!" Marie called in, putting her left arm armor back on. For now, she would play this out--she saw no other choice... <-----> "We must be getting close..." Chance said. The Dalek and the VW Microbus were currently traveling down a rubble-strewn, rain-soaked street, in which there were foot-deep footprints. Ahead they could see fires. "Uh..." Zen said, peering at the destruction, "Did you ever stop to consider that whatever did all this could be *really*, *really* big?" "Naw, I'm lucky--it's probably not as bad as we think." Zen looked in the rear-view mirror as a brownstone apartment building succumbed to the damage inflicted on it and collapsed. "Stop!" Benedict called out. Zen stopped the bus and he and Chance got out. "The e-ne-my is right a-round this cor-ner." The three snuck up to the corner and peered around. Rooster D. Structoid was standing right in front of them. "I be-lieve," Benedict said, "That it would be ex-pe-di-ent to make a tac-tic-al with-draw-al!!" "What did he say?" Chance asked as Benedict spun around and took off. "RUN AWAY!" Zen Navigator yelled. Chance agreed and took off after them as Rooster D. Structoid began to move. For no readily discernible reason, instead of ducking down side streets or evading, the three simply headed in the exact opposite direction. Chance and Zen quickly noticed that not only was Benedict lagging behind (hey, he's a salt-shaker with lil' wheels on the bottom, what do you expect?) but the Structoid was gaining. Raucous singing filled the air as Mule accidentally hit the external speakers. "Hm," Chance said, spying the Bob City Gum Factory (Best Bubblegum in Bob), "Zen! What if we gooked that thing with all the bubble-gum!" "It wouldn't work!" Zen replied, "You'd have to chew it before it got sticky, and where are we going to find someone to chew two billion tons of Bubble Gum?" "I believe..." Chance grinned, "That we'll trust to luck..." <-----> "I can't believe this!" Burnout muttered, "Where the Hell(tm) did this traffic jam come from?!" She and Sanka were pinned--literally--in a seething mass of automobiles which had appeared as if from nowhere and stretched for as far as they could see in either direction (which wasn't far, considering the rain...). "Damn! If this doesn't clear up, we could be stuck here for days!" <-----> Marie peered at the technological nightmare that she and Space Moose were constructing. Its' head was the MooseWing fighter, and its body was the main part of the 747. Its' legs were built from a pair of massive construction cranes. A massive, two-foot thick cable was its tail. Space Moose was now welding on the beginnings of an arm. Marie peered at the MooseMech. They were going to fight Rooster D. Structoid? In this? Space Moose was crazier than she thought... And, she said to herself, I'm must be absolutely insane to be going along with this...Why am I risking my life just to see Spectrum again? Marie pondered on that question for a long time, without ever coming up with an answer. <-----> "Look!" Zen shouted, "Over there!" "I told you we'd get lucky," Chance grinned. Over in a side street were two buses labeled 'Californian Professional Gum-Chewing Team'. Chance hurried over to them. Zen looked at Benedict and shrugged. Benedict rolled his optical sensor. "'scuse me..." Chance said, walking over to one of the buses. Several of the passengers banged on the windows and motioned for him to open the door. "Hm," Chance said, pulling on it. "Just my luck--it's locked! Hey, you in there, why don't you unlock it?!" There was a 'duh' from inside, and the door opened. "Like, whoa, you, like, figured out how to open the door! Like, and you're, like, a superhero dude! Kewl!" "Ahem," Chance said, stepping onto the bus. For once, he was in costume. "We've been, like, stuck in here for, like, a week..." a blonde girl said to him, "We, like, couldn't open the door..." Chance peered at the Californian Gum-Chewing Team. Yep. All blondes. Some of the ones in the back were only now realizing that someone new was in the bus. "A guy!" someone shouted, "I haven't seen a guy in a week!! Lemmee at 'im!!" "Eep!" Chance said, as they gang-tackled him. <-----> "Hm," Space Moose said, "We have almost everything, but we're missing a few vital electronic components..." "Hey!" a voice said from behind him and Marie, causing them to whirl around. They confronted a small cartoon rabbit in a trenchcoat. "I've got electronic bits galore--you name it, I've got it!" "How about a..." Space Moose paused to read a schematic ripped from the MooseWing's repair manual, "...quadrionic multiphase frombotzer?" He somehow managed to pronounce the words in a grand, heroic tone. Fuzzy peered into his coat. "I think so..." he said, "This is all stuff ol' doc Cheap left behind when he bailed...I wouldn't charge more than...two hundred for it..." "There's no time for haggling!" Space Moose bellowed, "We have to save the city!" "Well whoop-de-doo..." Fuzzy said, "Okay, you get a 'hero discount' of fifty cents." "Look, we'll take everything you've got," Marie said. "You got that much money?" Fuzzy replied. Marie pulled a pair of $1,000 bills from her butt-pack. Fuzzy peered at them, then peered into his trenchcoat. "Deal." <-----> Benedict and Zen Navigator peered at the bus as sounds of fighting emanated from inside. "No! Hey! What are you doing?!" "Oh, come on Mr. Hero..." "HEY! Not the costume!!" RIIIIIIIIIIP... "ARGH!" "Hm..." Zen Navigator said, "I guess Chance got lucky after all..." "THAT'S NOT THE KIND OF LUCK I MEANT!!" Chance yelled, "GET ME OUT OF HERE!!" Chance leaped out of the bus and slammed the door. There was a 'whooomp' noise as the Californian Gum-Chewing Team piled up against it, apparently not realizing it was closed. They had completely removed Chance's costume. "I guess I'm not destined to wear my costume..." Chance sighed, "Just get out my old clothes, will you?" Benedict rolled his optical sensor and banged his head into a stop sign several times. "We are wast-ing val-u-ab-le time!" he said, "We must move quick-ly!" "Ok.," Chance said, pulling on his jeans. "Open the door to the bus again." "Are you *sure*?" Zen asked. Chance nodded. Benedict extended his manipulator arm and pulled the door open. "Mr. Hero!!" the blondes chorused, running out. Benedict positioned himself between them and Chance, somehow managing to fend them off. "Ladies!" Chance shouted. The blondes fell silent. "I need your help..." "To do what, Mr. Hero?!" they chorused. "To chew...lots of gum!" "YAAAAY!" they yelled. "To the Bob City Gum Factory!!" Chance shouted. Meanwhile, nearby, the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers were all awake, although some very much didn't want to be." "Oog," Superchick groaned. "My haed..." Hellhound moaned, "It's goanna expload..." "Hey...(ouch)...Mule, d'you, uh, 'member that for...uh...f'rm...uh... that way you were a'gonna git da moose?" Reaper asked. "Whut?" Mule replied. "We'll...(ow)...get that...moose!" Superchick said. "Oooh, do I *ever* have a hangover!" <-----> "Power plant...active..." Marie said, "Actuators responding...All systems functioning..." "Activate primary locomotive systems!" Space Moose replied, dramatically. In reality, the two were separated by quite a distance-- Space Moose was in the MooseMech's head, while Marie was positioned down at its waist, running the seven or so gas engines that drove the mech and coordinating the various kludged systems. Space Moose ran the weapons and communications systems. They were conversing over a kludged intercom, and Marie had had to rig up a damper to keep the Antlers of Steel's Moosely Voice from blowing out the speakers on her end. "Locomotive systems on-line," Marie said, as displays flashed on the many Apple II-gs monitors in front of her. "Power output regulated at 8 Megawatts." "Forward!" Space Moose bellowed Moosily. Marie grimaced as the speaker on her end blew out again, and began hooking up the backup. Space Moose fiddled with the kludged controls, urging the MooseMech forward into a low walk. The mech's two arms, giant snowplows (for those cold days in Bob when the rain freezes in the streets), swung back and forth. There was a rending noise as one, then the other, ripped free and fell to the ground. "Whups!" Space Moose bellowed, "I *knew* I should have reinforced the shoulder joints..." "*sigh*," Marie said, as the mech tried to sit down, but instead fell backwards, slamming into the ground. One of the legs came loose. "Maybe I should have tightened the screws down there, too..." Marie buried her head in her hands and groaned. This was going to be a looooong day. <-----> "Hurry!" Chance urged the Californians. They were chewing massive wads of bubble-gum, sticking the chewed wads onto a massive bubblegum ball that was poised on the roof of the building, ready to fall into the street at any moment. "Here it comes," Zen said, as Rooster D. Structoid neared, wandering woozily through the streets. "I do not com-pre-hend this plan of yours," Benedict said, "What role am I to play in this?" "When we drop the gum-ball onto that thing, you zap the gum with your gun, and harden it so that it forms a shell around that robot-- then we can wait for those other heroes--Spectrum and Team M.E.C.H.A.-- to return and finish 'em off." "I am hav-ing sec-ond thoughts a-bout this plan..." Benedict muttered. "NOW!" Chance yelled. Everyone pushed the gum-ball, and it slowly began shifting off the roof of the building. Luckily, the drunk Grangers got distracted by a bill-board, and lingered in the target zone long enough for the gum-wad to be pushed off. By another amazing stroke of luck, no-one was stuck in the gum, which smashed into the Rooster and stuck there. "What, you mean Peter Noone is stuck in the gum?!" Zen shouted, "We have to save him!!" "Benedict, zap 'em!" Chance yelled. "Aff-ir-ma-tive," Benedict said, rolling to the edge of the roof and firing down. Cheesy SFX played off the surface of the Rooster as Benedict's ray hardened the gum into a thick, tough coating over the entire mech. "It's working! It's working!" Chance yelled, jumping up and down. The Rooster's arms strained in opposite directions. On the side away from the gum factory, a rip developed. The Hellhound arm came free, and grabbed onto the gum coating, peeling it off. The Structoid whirled the massive wad of semi-hardened gum and tossed it back at Chance's group. Chance gulped, and hoped something lucky would happen. Something lucky did happen--the gumwad missed him. It did, however, gum up absolutely everyone else. "I re-qui-re ass-ist-ance!" Benedict called out, from where he was gummed to a satellite dish (don't ask me why a gum factory would have a satellite dish...), "This is em-bar-ass-ing..." "My hair!" the Californians yelled as one, "There's *gum* in my *hair*!!" "Augh!" Zen yelled, "My 'I went to Planet BBC and all I got was this stupid t-shirt' t-shirt!" Chance watched helplessly as the Rooster wandered off down the street. Some other heroes would have to stop it now...But who else was there? <-----> "Dammit!" Burnout griped, "If this traffic jam doesn't clear up soon, I'm gonna hurt someone..." "Zzz," Sanka agreed. <-----> "It's working this time!" Marie exulted as the MooseMech took its first few faltering steps down the rainy streets of Bob City. "Of course!" Space Moose said loudly, "I designed it myself!" As if in response, one of Marie's monitor screens blew out. Marie rolled her eyes in disgust. Space Moose grew serious when he saw the massive smoke cloud hanging over Bob City, visible now that the rain had slowed to a low drizzle. "The Mighty Muddy Power Grangers must have recovered!" he bellowed, "we must hurry before they do more damage!!" <-----> Rooster D. Structoid wandered through Bob City, in search of Excedrin. The Grangers were all seriously hung over, and were not at all in good moods. "Cause...pain..." Superchick growled. "Hurt...that moose..." "Look!" Reaper said, peered ahead into the rain. "It's...it's..." "A GIAYNT MOOSE!" Bull said. "Whut?" Mule, now sobered up, said. "KILL IT!" Superchick yelled. "Ow!" the other Grangers chorused, "Nawt so laywd!" <-----> Space Moose armed the MooseWing's weapons systems as Rooster D. Structoid appeared ahead through the rain. The Grangers' mech was close to a half-mile away, the top of it showing over the tops of the smaller buildings. Space Moose ranged in the MooseWing's lasers, missing the Structoid but annihilating a 'Beavis and Butt-Head' billboard. The MooseMech abruptly stopped, then tipped forwards and fell against a building. "What happened, Tornado?!" Space Moose bellowed. "The main power lead just blew!" Marie yelled back, "We've got no power--we're going to have to replace it!!" Space Moose blew through the door that connected the MooseWing and the 747, and soared down the length of the jet, which had been nearly filled with electronics and gear. Marie was spraying a delicate-looking component with a fire extinguisher. "I'll delay the Grangers--you find a new power lead and do the repairs!" "No!" Space Moose bellowed, "I cannot allow you to fight the Grangers alone! They nearly killed you last time!!" "They nearly did the same to you, too! Besides, you're the only one who can fly around and find the component, and you know these systems better than me--I'll delay them, it's our only chance!" Space Moose paused. "You are truly brave..." he said, "I will aid you as soon as the repairs are finished!" "Right. I believe I may have a few tricks that can hold them..." Marie said, crawling up the 747 to the external hatch in the MooseWing head. "But I won't be able to hold them for long, so hurry!" Once outside, Marie climbed onto the roof of the building the MooseMech was leaning against. "Wayne!" she yelled into her communicator. {Yeeeeess?}, Wayne responded, after a minute. "Look, Wayne...I really need your help..." {Oh, so Ms. 'Go away, I don't want to be seen with you' needs help from lil' ol' me?} "Ok! Ok! I'm...I'm...uh..." {Sorry?} "Nnnh...Yes, ok, I'm sorry!! Will you get out here?! You've got to delay that Rooster-mech while me and Space Moose..." {SPACE MOOSE?! You want me to risk my, like, life for a freakin' MOOSE?!}, Wayne practically screamed over the comm-link. "Wayne, if Space Moose and I can defeat the Grangers, I would be recognized as a hero, and finally meet Spectrum! I *need* your help!" {Not until you, like, say the, like, magic word...} "NNnnnhhhh..." Marie said, clenching her jaw, "P...p...puh...p... *Please*?! There, are you happy?!" {Heh. I'll hold them off for, like, a couple minutes--I can't, like, give you any more than that.} "Thanks, Wayne," Marie said, relieved. {Mention it.}, Wayne replied. Marie saw Wayne and his two Armored Scout henchmen dive out of a rain-cloud at Rooster D. Structoid. She sighed and headed back towards the MooseMech. The things she was having to do just to be a hero... <-----> "INVID...AAATTAAAAAACK!" Wayne yelled, strafing the Structoid with the main gun of his Royal Command Battloid. His two Invid Armored Scout buddies attacked from the sides of the massive mech, stitching dozens of small craters in it with streams of annihilation frisbees. "Dammit!" Superchick yelled, "Where do all these idiots keep coming from?!" "Weh-yll..." Hellhound sayd...er...said, "They-ers this Sturk thing, an'..." "Shut up!" Superchick snapped. "Just kill them!!" Reaper flailed with the thresher-arm of the Structoid, hitting one of the Armored Scouts and ripping it to shreds. "Damn!" Wayne yelled, "This is, like, bogus! Like, concentrate fire on the, like, left knee!" He and his remaining follower sent stream after stream of annihilation disks into Rooster D. Structoid's left knee. After about a minute of this, as the Grangers tried to rally for a counterattack, sparks exploded from the knee as a couple actuators exploded. "Yes!" Wayne said. The Grangers, annoyed, responded with their main gun, atomizing his remaining follower. "No!! I'm *outta* here! Marie, you're, like, on your own!" <-----> "Is it fixed yet?!" Marie shouted into MooseMech, agitated. She had heard Wayne, and seen what the Structoid had done to his small force. If they couldn't get the MooseMech running... Space Moose looked astounded. "I thought you were going to fight the Grangers! How did you delay them?!" "Uh..." Marie said, "You really don't want to know." Space Moose shrugged. "All systems seem to be working now...Let's teach those villains what happens when they mess with...SPAAAAAACE MOOOOOOOSE!!" "Eep!" Marie said as several pieces of metal were dislodged from the ceiling and fell to the floor. She hurried for the ladder down to her station as Space Moose gunned the engines, urging the MooseMech forward. <-----> Dozens of techs scurried about the command-control center of the Grey October, overseeing emergency troop redeployments. "How long until those reinforcements reach Bob City?!" Anime Freak barked. "At least a half-hour, sir!" a tech responded, "We mobilized an airmobile battalion from Headquarters, and it should be in position shortly. None of our other units are within transport range." "Dammit..." Anime Freak grumbled. "Just think what an addition to our forces that mech would make, if only we could capture it..." <-----> A Western gunfight-style whistle (oo-wee-oo-wee-ooooo...). The MooseMech stepped into the street a couple hundred meters from Rooster D. Structoid. The Grangers, who had seen some mighty weird things so far, were stunned into silence by the sight before them. The MooseMech was huge--the MooseWing fighter, massive as it was, comprised only the head of the giant construction. The main body was the fuselage of a 747, with extra armor plates tacked on for good luck. The legs were made of large steel cables and construction cranes, covered with a thick shell of fused iron. The arms were a medley of various components--but sported huge, sharp snow-plow blades as if they were hooves. The joints were protected by massive tires. A five-foot-thick woven steel cable served as the creation's tail. It stood, poised, waiting for the Grangers to make the first move. "It's gotta be that pesky Moose!" Superchick said, "We'll rip him apart, then get out of this city before any more heroes show up..." Rooster D. Structoid braced itself, then leaped, covering the massive distance to the MooseMech in one lunge. Space Moose desperately fiddled the controls, dodging his Moosely Creation out of the way. Marie triggered a control, and the MooseMech's tail whipped out, wrapping around the Structoid's leg and tripping it. "This..." Space Moose said, raising the MooseMech's right arm, "This is for what you did to Clyde!!" The arm split open, deploying a sharpened aircraft wing, which slid into position as a sort of sword. Space Moose bellowed as he hacked chunks of armor off the Rooster's arms. Reaper slashed with the Thresher arm, but the blades merely glanced off the MooseMech's thick armor. The Grangers quickly rallied, and the Hellhound arm grabbed the makeshift sword, crumpling it and ripping it free from the MooseMech's grip. Superchick triggered the main gun, blasting the MooseMech clear down the street. "Prepare for ramming!" Space Moose bellowed Moosily. Marie grimaced as the speaker on her end blew out again--she didn't need it, what with Space Moose shouting like that--and triggered the mode-shift sequence. The MooseMech dropped onto its knees, and the tires that served as joints locked into position, letting the MooseMech roll along. Four salvaged jet engines deployed from the rear, and roared to life, propelling the MooseMech towards Rooster D. Structoid. Space Moose lowered the MooseWing-head, aiming the antlers for a ramming attack. *WHAAAANGGGGGG*! The Grangers were too slow to react--the Rooster was hit by the MooseMech, and the two went roaring off down the street. "Aim them at the Bob City Central Park!" Marie called out from her station, "We should take this battle where it won't cause too much more property damage!" "Right!" Space Moose bellowed. Several more electronic components dislodged themselves and clattered to the floor. "AAAAAAARRRGGGGHH!" the Grangers chorused, as the MooseMech- Rooster thing was propelled towards the vastly overgrown Bob City Central Park (Central Swamp would be a more accurate description). "Wow!" Fuzzy said, walking along the sidewalk near the Central Swamp, "I made $2,008 bucks in one day! I must really be movin' up in the world." *whoooommmm* "What's that noise?" Fuzzy blinked, looking around. *Whooooommmmm* Fuzzy became agitated as windows in nearby buildings began to rattle. Passing private detectives peered around, trying to spot a clue that would reveal to them what was going on. *WHOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM!!!!* "Stunt double!!" Fuzzy shrieked, as the MooseMech bore down on him. He was squashed flat by one of the four tires, and the private eyes were scattered to the four winds. "Ow," he said, from his vantage point as a thin coating on the pavement. "This...*really* hurts..." "We're here!" Marie yelled, "Stop us!!" "What?" "Hit the brakes!!" "Right!" Space Moose bellowed. There was a sound of rending metal. "Whoops!" Marie slapped her forehead. "Uh...That's not good, right?" "I think we can forget about the brakes...They, uh, broke..." Space Moose said, sounding vaguely apologetic. "#$*%&@#%!!!" People would long remember the day of the great battle--if only because the Rooster and the MooseMech plowed up a 500-foot trench in the middle of the Central Swamp, disrupting the local mugging business for several months. The dirt that was excavated by the impact became a local landmark for a while, until it was realized that it blocked the locals' view of the Bob City Space Needle. The Extreme Team was called in, but left after Captain Non Sequitor planted the entire mound with Venus fly-traps. There was a moral in there somewhere, but I'll be darned if I can find it... "Status report?!" bellowed the Antlers of Steel. "Ow...pain...ow, pain..." Marie replied, shifting off a couple tanks of fuel that had fallen on her. "I'm...ok...down here..." "Good! I think we've really gotten their attention now!" "Oh, *yay*." Superchick was not happy. In the space of a day, the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers had fought no less than four battles, and had had an absolutely enormous wad of gum dropped on them. Now they were fighting battle #5, with no end in sight. Superchick screamed with frustration as the Moose-Mech deployed a pair of fire hoses salvaged from the Bob City Fire Department, and began spraying the Rooster with Cheez Whiz. She fired the main gun into the Moose-Mech's chest, somehow hitting the Cheez-Whiz tank. There was a massive explosion, and when the smoke cleared, the terrain for several blocks was coated with a thin layer of the fake cheese product. <-----> Bulletproof stomped moodily along the rainy streets of Bob City, somewhere in the vicinity of the Central Swamp. He paused. 'Cheez Whiz?', he thought, peering at the glops of the stuff that had somehow made it this far. He caught a glimpse, down a side street, of a giant Rooster and a giant Moose duking it out in a Cheez-Whiz- coated landscape. A giant piece of squid tentacle lay at his feet. "I believe..." Bulletproof said, with the voice of someone who has really had enough and is not going to take it anymore, "I believe I am going to have a *long* talk with the Captain when I find him..." Turning, he stomped off down the street, leaving a trail of footprint-shaped potholes in the pavement. <-----> "Ha!" Superchick laughed, as she fired the main gun once again into the MooseMech's chest. Armor splintered and blew away, but somehow the Mech remained intact. "Space Moose!" Marie yelled up the interior of the Mech, "You've got to disable that gun, or we're done for!! We can't take too many more hits like that!" "Right!" Space Moose bellowed dramatically, pressing a big red button labelled 'The Big Red Button'. "Let's see them shrug *this* off!" At that moment, every weapon on the MooseWing opened fire. The air was shattered by the sheer mass of ammunition expended. Lasers, particle beams, and hundreds of mini-Moosiles smashed into Rooster D. Structoid, knocking it back into a large morass which used to be the Central Park's main playground. The Rooster's armor was blackened and charred by the time Space Moose stopped. The Rooster got to its feet and shook itself off--all the firepower of the MooseWing couldn't inflict serious damage on it. The main gun fired again, sending shards of metal from the MooseMech's left shoulder. "Look at the left knee!" Marie called out, peering at her external viewer, "It looks damaged--hit it there!" Space Moose flipped another makeshift switch, and a ladder extended rapidly from the MooseMech's left arm, catching behind the Rooster's knee. The MooseMech pulled hard, dropping the Rooster back into the muck. "This has gawn awn lawng enough!" Superchick growled, "Finish them off!" The Grangers hauled their battered mech to its feet, and began firing the main gun as quickly as it could reload. The MooseMech was sent reeling backwards, armor shattered in several locations. Yelling in triumph, The Rooster surged forward, and slammed its Hellhound-arm completely through the damaged MooseMech. The MooseMech collapsed with a sound of groaning metal. "DIE!" Superchick cackled, stomping the Structoid mech up and down on the wreck, "DIE!! Here's a hero that won't be coming back to fight us again!!" "Tornado!" Space Moose yelled down the length of the MooseMech. Marie popped her head up from the hatch behind him, startling him. "What are you doing up here?!" "I hauled butt up here when they started ripping holes in my section of the mech!" Marie replied. "What now?! They're gonna kill us!!" As if to emphasize this, the side of the MooseWing began to buckle inwards from the pressure of the Rooster on it. "No other way.," Space Moose said, flipping a couple switches. A red light began to blink. , a mechanical voice said, Marie's eyes widened. This crazy Moose would kill them both! "We must destroy these villains!" Space Moose said dramatically, "Otherwise, who knows how many they could kill on their rampage!" Outside, the arms of the MooseMech deployed claw-like hands, and locked onto the legs of Rooster D. Structoid. The larger combined mecha struggled to free itself, but the MooseMech held on tightly. "Go!" the Antlers of Steel bellowed Moosily, "I must stay to make sure the destruct system doesn't fail!" 'This idiot fought alongside Spectrum in Springfield...' Marie thought, 'I cannot allow him to kill himself--what would Spectrum think?!' "Space Moose, don't! There has to be another way!" "This is the only chance we'll get!" Space Moose bellowed, "If they get loose, they'll blow us apart from a distance! We must destroy them now!" From a skewed viewpoint, the Moose was right, Marie considered, but she was not about to sacrifice herself in such a manner! She dived for the external hatch, but found it would not open--perhaps it had been fused in the battle, or damaged by the Rooster's stomps, or just locked. Perhaps it was that she was trying to 'pull' a door quite obviously labeled 'Push'. "No!!" Marie yelled, all her armor-enhanced strength not budging the door an inch, "It can't end like this!!" Space Moose looked serene and brave, confident that he was sacrificing his life nobly so that others could live on. The Grangers were panicking, as the countdown was being broadcast on the external speakers. Was this what being a hero was?, Marie wondered, sacrificing one's life for the good of others? "Wait.," Space Moose bellowed, "There's something on the radar!" WHAT'S ON THE RADAR??? WILL SPACE MOOSE BLAST HIMSELF INTO TINY, BUT STILL HEROIC, PIECES??? WILL MARIE READ THE 'PUSH' SIGN ON THE DOOR, AND GET OUT IN TIME??? WILL BURNOUT AND SANKA STAY STUCK IN THE TRAFFIC JAM??? WILL MARIE EVER ACTUALLY SEE SPECTRUM AGAIN??? WILL CHANCE EVER GET TO FIGHT IN COSTUME??? WILL BULLETPROOF HIT CAPTAIN NON SEQUITUR WITH SOMETHING HEAVY??? IF MULE MANAGES TO STAY DRUNK FOR A WHILE, WILL HE GET A DOCTORATE IN SCIENCE??? WILL THE REPAIR BILL FOR ALL THIS DAMAGE BANKRUPT BOB CITY??? WHY ARE TEASER QUESTIONS IN ALL CAPS??? WILL THERE EVER BE A SPELL-CHECKER THAT DOESN'T DIE WHEN IT TRIES TO CHECK THE GRANGERS' LINES??? DURNED...ER...DARNED IF I KNOW, BUT MAYBE CHRIS DOES, IN THE NEXT CROSSOVER POST...ONLY ON...*SUPERGUY*!!! ========================================================================= Date: Wed, 16 Feb 1994 11:31:13--0600 Reply-To: UCF SUPERGUY List Sender: UCF SUPERGUY List From: Robotech_Master Subject: SG: Bob City MegaCrossover #4 (Team M.E.C.H.A. #34) TEAM M.E.C.H.A. #34 BOB CITY MEGACROSSOVER #5 By Robotech_Master, With Help from Gadge and Amigoid Guest-Starring Spectrum, the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers, Chance, Zen Navigator, Benedict Arnold, and a Cast of Thousands A Story of High Technology, and Highly Versatile Mecha (I thought ALL mecha were supposed to be versatile...) NOTE: In an effort to be more realistic, this episode was written using the type of dialogue that the characters Reaper and Hellhound were modelled after, respectively Beavis and Butthead, would use. If this offends you, watch an episode of Beavis and Butthead and you will be more offended, trust me. "Team M.E.C.H.A., stand by for drop-deploy," Mike said smoothly, checking the mike in the special CVR suit he was wearing. This new armor was gleaming black, like the Bahamode he was occupying, with a somewhat sleeker look than standard CVR. The chest was supposed to have the Team M.E.C.H.A. insignia on the left breast and the Bahamode Sigma insignia on the right, but it was blank because they had not come up with either of those symbols yet. The words "TEAM M.E.C.H.A." were printed along the front of the helmet chinpiece, however. "We're ready and waiting!" Adam replied, running a quick check on his Bahamode's weapon systems once more. This was one of the coolest bikes he'd ever had, and one of the hottest, too. Hotter than most, to be sure, especially with the plasma flamethrower unit it was equipped with. That Granger was going to get a taste of his own medicine! Who said revenge was best served cold, anyway? Sarah Conner checked to see that her straps were secure, and looked over the diagnostic readouts once more. She'd not had much of a chance to try this mech out, but she could already feel how fast it was. She would be lethal in hand-to-hand combat, of this she was certain. "You bet! Let me at those lousy Grangers!" Lincoln Douglas entered a last command on the keyboard, then repositioned it out of the way. "All systems are go. Standing by," he said simply. He glanced at the cockpit monitors, currently displaying data and camera footage from taps into the M.E.C.H.A. jet's main computer. They were nearly to Bob now...just a few more minutes. Dr. Odd Science was more concerned with himself than with his equipment. Although he had not admitted it to Mike, he was more than a little unsure of his combat abilities. The time he'd spent in the simulators had been minimal, and geared more toward testing and debugging simulator subroutines than toward developing sizeable combat skills. But there was no one else suited to piloting this mecha...he just hoped he could pick it up as they went along. "Of course, I shall be prepared at any time you choose," he said absently. Spectrum sat in one of the drop chutes, staring off into space. He was rather startled when someone sat down beside him. "Mind if I sit down here?" Summer asked, light glinting off her gleaming hardsuit visor. "Huh? Oh, no, go ahead..." Spectrum scooted over to make room for her. She sat down beside him. "You look worried," Summer said. "Just preoccupied," Spectrum replied. "I'm wondering where Foxy is, and if she's all right..." "Why did she leave? Um, I mean, if you don't mind me asking..." Spectrum shrugged, "I was stupid. She was trying to be a friend, and get me to face reality (such as it is). I think she was in love with me, and I blew my top, said some things I wish I hadn't. It's all happening so fast. One day I'm a sysadmin, the next I'm a gateway for dimensional energies and my old life's an illusion. I sometimes wonder what's the real me anymore." Summer nodded. "I can relate to that. Boy, oh, BOY can I relate to that." She lapsed to human form for a moment, smiled. "Don't worry. If she loves you, she'll be back. I know she will." "I suppose you're right..." Spectrum sighed. "...but having her here right now would sure be helpful." "You ready for action?" Summer asked, shifting back to her hardsuit form. "Yeah, that I am," Spectrum said. "I'm still not entirely sure this is going to work, though." "Dr. Science checked the neural linkups in your armor and fitted the Sigma unit with an adaptor," Summer said. "You should be completely compatible." "That's not what I meant. Summer, you saw that thing, you fought it, you even got impaled by it. Can just the seven of us take it by ourselves?" "By ourselves, probably not. But together--in linkup--I think we just might have a chance," Summer said. "And besides, there will be eight of us, counting Ray Sterling." "Oh, that's right. But still, you think we have a chance?" "I wouldn't be here otherwise..." "All right, everyone, now listen up. Here's the plan." Mike broadcast via video to the screens of all the other Bahamodes. Summer and Spectrum activated their helmet displays to receive the transmission. "Once we've spotted the Rooster Destructoid, Ray is going to get a lock and then dive the M.E.C.H.A. jet toward it, firing the main gun once we're within range. Then, when we're directly overhead, we drop and take 'em, and Ray will join us shortly thereafter." "No problems here," Adam said. "You guys?" There were murmurs of assent. "Great." Mike punched up the jet's flight deck on one of his screens. "Hey, Ray, any signs yet?" "Negative...no, wait! I'm reading something!" "Route it through," Mike ordered. "Roger." Ray punched some keys, and it appeared on one of the screens in Mike's Bahamode: the Rooster Destructoid battling some other mecha. Mike gawked. He couldn't believe his eyes! It was--it was-- "It's a giant moose!" Meanwhile, inside the MooseMech... "WHAT?!? What's on that radar? And how do you open this &$^@! door???" "It is open..." Space Moose twirled a dial on the sparking MooseScope as the counters continued down past 5...4...3... "Yes!! They have returned, as I knew they would!" The Antlers of Steel bellowed, slamming a hooved hand into the 'Destruct Abort' button, "It is the M.E.C.H.A. Jet! Team M.E.C.H.A. has returned!" "That's fine, that's great, I'm happy for you." Marie spoke in rapid-fire, not having yet remembered that Spectrum was likely to be with them. The damaged cockpit shuddered once more as the Rooster continued to struggle. "Now let's get outta here!" "I agree, brave Tornado! We shall join Team Mecha in the final battle against these most vile of foes!" "Oh shoot, he still wants to...AAAAAAHHHHH!!!" The shot from the rail-gun removed the hatchway cleanly, sending it flying up to *bonk* the Rooster lightly on the head. Space Moose thanked Tornado for her thoughtfulness and helped her through the narrow exit. Outside, the Grangers had finally managed to free their titanic mecha from the MooseMech's death grip. "Huh huh, we're loose!" cried Hellhound. "Heh heh, you said 'loose,' heh heh heh heh heh," Reaper contributed. "And the counter's stopped! That Moose must'a been bluffing!" snarled SuperChick angrily. "Whut?" asked Mule. "They're getting away, heh heh, heh heh heh!" Reaper pointed the many-bladed arm towards the side of the fallen MooseMech, where Marie's Tornado armor had just emerged from a side hatch. It was rapidly followed by a figure that the Grangers had learned to hate, as their hangovers still throbbed though their heads... "It's that dang MOOSE!!!" "KIULL THAUT CRITTER!!!" The Rooster lurched forwards... On the ground... "Thank you, Tornado. And now, we must..." "DIE!!!!!" Superchick screamed over her external speakers. The two heros had just enough time to look up and see Rooster D. Structoid descending upon them like...well, like a giant mechanical chicken. Fortunately, the Grangers' hangover-induced anger threw off their aim. The first blow by Reaper missed the two small figures. Instead of slicing Space Moose, he struck the MooseMech's neck, beheadding the defeated machine cleanly. The next kick, aimed by Mule, also missed, and only succeeded in kicking the disconnected MooseWing head away into the distance. However, the next shot was more on-target. Seeing the massive main gun aiming towards them, the Antlers of Steel threw Marie aside. "Tornado! GET DOWN!!" *BOOM* There was nothing left after the shot, save a few pieces of blood-stained fur scattered about. Aboard the M.E.C.H.A. jet, those team members watching forward viewscreens gaped in horror. "They...they killed Space Moose!" was all Mike could say. "No, wait...over there!" Summer pointed to a distant parking garage, a heavily damaged structure that had been directly behind Space Moose. There was a new crater in it's side, as if it had been struck by an exceedingly large Moosile... The Antlered Arctic Avenger slowly pulled himself up from where the cannonshot had thrown him. "I...would like to thank the Academy..." was all he said before falling flat on his face. "GRANGERS!!! FINISH HIM OFF!!!" Mike hit the 'talk' key in his Bahamode. "Ray, punch it! We've got to get in there!" "Right. I'm firing the boosters, and initiating the main gun's charge cycle." Rocket thrusters flared, and the M.E.C.H.A. jet swooped in low over the city. Ray Sterling hit some keys, and lined up the shot perfectly. They were coming in behind the Destructoid, and he had a wonderfully clear shot at its back. "They won't know what hit them..." Ray pulled the trigger, and the SDF-in-miniature cannon fired, projecting a huge beam of light out and forward. The blast struck the Destructoid in the back as it lumbered after the downed Space Moose. Before any of the Grangers could react, their control linkages had failed and the Rooster Destructoid had separated into its individual mecha. Mike keyed his commset. "All right, let's do it." Team M.E.C.H.A. launched out of the drop bay, and thrusters fired. Spectrum was last out. He fed energy to his armor's flight systems and streamers of rainbow energy trailed behind him as he dived earthward. There! Up in the sky! It's a flock of mutant geese! It's Hasbro's newest action figures on steroids! It's a bunch of lemmings with parachutes! No! It's Team M.E.C.H.A. and Spectrum!!! Laying face-down in the rubble, Space Moose held up a front hoof. "Hey," he said weakly, "you can't use those lines! I'm using those lines..." If he had anything more to add, it was lost when the parking garage fell over on top of him, splattering shards of concrete all over the approaching Granger mecha and covering the area in clouds of dust. "All right, guys, let's take 'em before they recover!" Mike fired the thrusters and rocketed into action. "Flame-bait's MINE!" Adam called, charging up the plasma flamethrower cannon. "Huh huh huh bite me!" The Hellhound leaped into the air, and was met head-on by a blast of white-hot plasma flame. "Bite THIS, punk!" "Heh heh he said BITE heh heh heh," announced Reaper, maneuvering his Thresher toward Link. The blades rotated menacingly. Link raised the machine rifle and didn't bother saying anything, so the Author didn't have to come up with something appropriately witty. He just fired the cannon in rapid-fire full-auto mode. Unfortunately, the armor on the Thresher was strong enough to withstand the blasts. "Heh heh heh heh heh die heh heh heh heh!!!" The thresher came closer and closer, seeming to get bigger and bigger as it came. Link stowed the rifle and hit some power relays. "Activate Electro-Magnetic Pulse cannons, lock and FIRE!" Bolts of lightning lanced forth from the blue Bahamode's arms and slammed into the Thresher. Its engine promptly died, and cockpit electronics blew out in a shower of sparks. "Dang!" SuperChick howled. "They're whippin' us!" She rocketed her mecha toward Mike's black Bahamode, charging her beak's pecker-blast cannon. "I'll show you!" Then a red blur materialized in front of the beaked mecha, or so it seemed. It was a sleekly-styled red Bahamode, and its curves left no doubt as to the gender of its pilot. "I think you need a new dialogue writer, honey," Sarah Conner said, lashing out and pounding the chicken mecha right under the beak. The Bahamode's arms seemed almost to blur as Sarah bashed away, alternating lefts and rights, held firmly above the ground by twin trails of thrusterfire. She gave SuperChick no time to defend herself between blows. WHAM!WHAM!WHAM!WHAM!WHAM!WHAM!!! Sarah kept up the pace, steady as a piledriver, jaw set in an expression of grim determination. Her every punch knocked the chicken-mech farther back, until it was right where Sarah wanted it. Kicking the thrusters up another notch, she boosted forward and met the SuperChick with a rocket-powered knee to the chin. The poultrine mecha flew back, tumbling out of control, to slam into the side of Dundee's Aussie Watering Hole (Best Billabong in Bob) and slide down the wall to the ground. The SuperChick mech got shakily to its feet. "I'll have the linguini with clams..." Pinto Sally remarked woozily. Summer and Spectrum doubleteamed Mule, firing at him with just about everything they had. Mule's ignorance-invunerabily shrugged off the blasts. "Whut?" "It's not working!" Summer realized. "He doesn't notice us!" "What do you suggest?" Spectrum asked. "I WOULD suggest we attack from behind," Summer said drily. "But since that's the whole problem..." "Right. From the front, then. Let's do it!" Spectrum and Summer touched down in front of the massive Mule mech. It stopped in front of them. "Hey, Mule," Summer said. "Uh...whut?" "We're going to, um, shoot you with these really big guns, and..." "Whut?" "Never mind, just watch." Summer fired her lasers, and Spectrum fired a massive blast of energy. The blast threw Mule backward into the side of the same building Superchick had hit (Dundee's Aussie Watering Hole). Because Mule didn't see the wall, he crashed right through it without being hurt. But Summer and Spectrum had done more than enough damage to stun him. They slapped each other five before continuing to the next menace. At the moment, Adam was facing down Bull, trading energy blasts with him. He had so far managed to dodge most of the blasts, and was keeping ahead of him with his jumpjets, but it couldn't last for long. "Hey!" Spectrum yelled. "Remember me?" The bull turned. Steam hissed out of its nostrils, and it pawed the ground. Electricity crackled between its horns, but it made no move to fire. Probably out of recollection of what had happened the LAST time. "Toro, toro!" Spectrum yelled. That was it. Now Bull was mad. The metallic bull's head lowered, and it charged (ran, that is...it already had a full charge in its capacitors, so it didn't need to...oh, never mind). Spectrum whooped as the bull got closer and closer, horns locked in optimum goring position. Summer took to the sky, firing blasts down at the bovine battle machine (to no great effect). At the last instant, Spectrum imparted some kinetic energy to the bull at a different vector so that it veered off in another direction. Before Bull could stop, the mecha had knocked over a fire hydrant, and the resulting geyser shorted out his capacitors. "Thar beatin' us!" Pinto Sally realized. "Grangers! Let our powers combine!" The five mechs staggered back together, getting into locking position, and reassembled themselves into the Rooster Destructoid before Team M.E.C.H.A. could do anything to stop them. The Destructoid began to advance on them. "Attention, team! Pull back and prepare for merge!" Mike ordered. But even as he did so, he could see that it wouldn't work--the team was scattered too widely, and the Destructoid was too close--it was lifting its foot now, and the shadow was falling on Mike's Bahamode... "Die!!!" The cry came not from any of the Grangers, but from Ray Sterling, whose Veritech Alpha Fighter was streaking down and in, firing full-auto from its GU-XX cannon and launching a spread of air-to-air missiles. The rockets and cannon fire struck the Destructoid and staggered it, buying Team M.E.C.H.A. enough time to regroup. "Okay, team, you know what to do. Summer, are you okay with this?" Mike asked. Summer nodded. "I feel...ready." Summer knew exactly what she was supposed to do and how to do it. She didn't quite understand it, but Dr. Odd Science had attached some kind of electrode system to her and transmitted a series of electromagnetic pulses through them. The nanites, he had explained, would be able to comprehend and translate these pulses, giving them all the data they needed on the Bahamode Sigma's construction and operation. Summer now had an almost instinctive grasp of the Bahamode Sigma's design. She didn't know what half of the stuff DID, but she did know where it was, what it was composed of, and anything else she could ever hope to know...as long as she consciously thought about it. If she didn't try to recall it, the knowledge disappeared completely from her head. It was as though this was something that was stored solely in the nanite memory banks. It was really weird, being able to remember stuff she didn't remember having learned, but Summer was beginning to get used to weirdness in her life. "Spectrum?" "Aye, captain, ready to rock!" Dr. Science had told Spectrum everything he needed to know for the linkup, and had loaded some special programs into his armor's onboard computer that would handle the interfacing. "Then let's do it! Bahamode Sigma...combine!" Mike reached out and pulled down the actuator lever, and knew that in all four of the other Bahamodes, the pilots were doing the same. Thrusters fired, launching the mecha into the air even as components rotated, shifted, reshaped themselves. Spectrum's own thruster packs fired as his ManCo PoWerArmor's computer executed the linkup program. "Form feet and legs!" Mike called out over the radio as Link's and Dr. Science's Bahamodes' arms and legs retracted and locked together, and the mecha slammed into the bottom of his Bahamode, locking firmly in place. "Form arms and torso!" Sarah Conner's and Adam's Bahamodes underwent a similar transformation and locked into place. Components slammed together, and the computers registered linkup. Spectrum rocketed up behind the still-headless mecha, executed a mid-air flip, and slid downward into a cockpit that had opened up in the front of the Sigma's torso. He ended up in a sort of a half-standing position, located in front of and slightly below Mike's cockpit (like the gunner in an attack helicopter), with a partly transparent canopy locking down in front of him. "And I'll form the head!" Summer announced, flying up in front of the combined Bahamodes. This was it, she knew. The merge would be a whole new experience for her, for unlike the others, she was actually combining her physical self with these other machines, and it could possibly have some side-effects that she was completely unaware of. It was one of the scarier things she had ever contemplated doing, but she knew it had to be done. There was no turning back, not now. And so, Summer tucked her legs and arms up against her chest, then the distinction between her arms and legs and chest blurred, and her form shifted into something altogether different: a head. It slammed down into place atop the torso formed by Mike's black Bahamode and latched in place. Bahamode Sigma was complete. "Activating control linkages," Mike announced. He reached for the lever. It was with severe misgiving that he was about to do this, for he knew that it would probably affect Summer in some way, perhaps changing her forever. But he had to think of the greater good. What would happen to this city if the Grangers continued to rampage, unchecked? It just plain wasn't an option. His friends were counting on him. Thousands of people were counting on him. He had no choice. Mike pulled the lever. Summer experienced a moment of extreme disorientation--then she was standing in the middle of a ruined city block, matching height with the buildings. And yet, she felt different somehow...she could feel the people inside of her, but there was something else... With a slight shock, she suddenly realized what it was. She could feel the minds of the other six people inside the Bahamode Sigma, read their surface thoughts and emotions. *It must be the mental control system,* she realized. *I wonder if the others feel it too.* It was strange...if she tried, she could sense their worry and anxiety. And their intentions. Mike was about to move the mecha forward, and Adam wanted to raise his arm to fire his gun, while Sarah wanted to tackle the Rooster Destructoid. Obviously, they could not do all three of these things...Summer diverted the control impulses, modified the commands slightly, and let them go. The mega Bahamode battloid hefted the fusion cannon gunpod with which it was equipped and moved forward. "Summer, you okay?" Mike asked. He wasn't sure, but he was feeling something strange...almost like an itch inside his head, the sort of thing that could turn into a headache if you thought about it too hard. Must be a side-effect of the control system or something. He resolved not to think about it. "Don't worry about me," Summer replied. "I'm on top of everything." She giggled at the unintentional pun. "Right, then...let's do it." Chance E. Vennt stood atop the Bob City Bubblegum Factory (Best Bubblegum in Bob) building and watched the smoke rise. "Some hero you turned out to be," he muttered. "I'm standing here, with my friends all gummed up, while the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers are all somewhere else, probably beating up on some more heroes." "Do not feel bad!" Zen Navigator said, from where he was trying unsuccessfully to disentangle himself from all the gum. "We all have our off days." "Ever have one of those off-lives?" Chance remarked. "Don't worry!" Zen Navigator said. "We shall find a way to handle this bubblegum crisis!" Chance groaned. "I KNEW the Author was gonna throw that in somewhere..." Oblivious, Zen continued, "If you seem unlucky, it is only because--" "--you are an id-i-ot," Benedict Arnold helpfully supplied. Benedict was, at the moment, engaged in trying to decide whether or not to char-broil Chance. It was a hard decision to make. "No, that's not it," Zen Navigator said. "It's only because you are not trying. Go ahead, concentrate on being lucky. Who knows? Maybe something will happen." High over head, a Grumman Goose flying boat (the most popular type of plane for flying to Bob, being both film noirish and able to float) was carrying a cargo of acetone. Acetone is a solvent, used in such things as nail polish remover. This particular shipment came from Sal's Saratoga Solvents (Supreme Solvents in Saratoga) and was destined for Bob's Archaeology and Paleontology, Inc. (Best Bones in Bob). But it wasn't going to get there. One of the engines sputtered and died. "What the hell (TM)?!" the unshaven pilot muttered, adjusting his fedora. "We're running low on fuel! Damn! There must be a leak in the lines somewhere! Never should have trusted Jacques to get me this plane..." "What you want me to do, boss?" the short Asian kid sitting in the copilot's seat asked. "There's nothing for it. Dump the shipment or we'll never make it to Bob City Municipal." "Right!" The kid got up and ran back to jettison the cargo. "Even the special radioactive acetone?" he asked. "Yeah, all of it!" the pilot called back over his shoulder. The kid came back shortly afterward. "There! I do as you say. What now?" The pilot glanced out the cockpit window. "Hope no one's standing underneath." Chance sighed. "I don't know what--" "War-ning! Sen-sors have de-tec-ted ob-jects di-rectly over-head, fal-ling at ter-min-al ve-loc-it-ies! E-lim-i-nate! E-lim-i-nate!" Benedict's cannon elevated as best it could and fired in a volley of cheesy special effects. High overhead, all the acetone tanks were hit right through the middle. Instead of exploding in balls of fire, however, the containers simply shattered, sending a rain of acetone down upon the entrapped girls, navigator, and Dalek. "Yay!" the girls chorused as the bubblegum melted and ran off. Then, "Hey, my nail polish is ruined!" "There's just no pleasing some people..." Chance muttered. None of them noticed the glowing acetone that had rained down upon one of the girls, or the way that all the bubblegum covering her had not so much dissolved as simply vanished... "Give up, Grangers!" Mike broadcast over the external speakers. "You're outnumbered and outmatched!" "Like Hayull!" the Grangers replied defiantly. "Who or what is Hayull?" Dr. Science wondered. "And does it require a (TM)?" Link added. "Quiet down there!" Mike ordered. "Okay, Summer...any time you're ready." "Right. Spectrum--give me full power!" "You got it." Spectrum began channeling more energy through his body and releasing it down the power conduits plugged into his armor suit. The two mecha moved forward, circling. Marie and Ray Sterling decided that this would be a good point at which to get out of the way, and pulled back to the safety of a nearby building to watch the battle. "Go, Team M.E.C.H.A.!" Marie yelled. "Go, Spectrum! Yay!!!" Ray Sterling glanced over at her. "Say, don't I know you from somewhere?" Marie hurriedly closed her visor. "Huh? No, not me. Never seen you before in my life." Ray Sterling shrugged. "Whatever." Rooster D. Structoid lunged. Summer let Sarah Conner take over for long enough to grasp Rooster's arm and use its own momentum to toss it into the side of a nearby The Gap (Best (at) Being-Everywhere in Bob). Sarah pumped her fist, and so did Bahamode Sigma. "YES!!!" As the Destructoid got to its feet, Adam levelled the fusion cannon and fired. BA-THWAM, BA-THWAM, BA-THWAM!!! The shots did some armor damage, but mainly bounced off of the Grangers' mecha's heavy armor. "Hey, Dr. Science, I believe you mentioned something about finding us a weak spot...?" Mike asked. Dr. Science punched keys, turned knobs, and adjusted levers. "I'm working on it now. Don't rush me." As if on cue, the Rooster Destructoid rushed at Bahamode Sigma, firing its main gun. Spectrum barely managed to throw up a force shield in time to deflect the shots. "The shield transducers do seem to be working well," he noted. "But for how much longer, I'm not sure..." Bahamode Sigma ducked a swing from Reaper's arm of the Destructoid and lashed out with a snap-kick that knocked Rooster back. "Huh huh huh eat flame, asswipe! huh huh huh huh," Hellhound announced, firing a blast from the flamethrowers built into his arm of Rooster Destructoid. "Heh heh heh FIRE! heh heh," Reaper cheered. "FIRE! FIRE! Heh heh heh." "Shut up, Reaper, you dick," Hellhound sneered. Bahamode Sigma's shields blocked the flame, and Adam continued firing the fusion cannon. "Die, you bastards, DIE!!!" They didn't. "Huh huh, hey Reaper, what if we, like, took an Invid, and, like, stuck a nuclear bomb up its butt and set it off, huh huh. That would be COOL, huh huh huh huh," Hellhound said. "Yeah. Cool. Heh heh heh heh. Let's do it. Heh heh," Reaper said. "Will you SHET UP ALREADY?!" SuperChick yelled. "You're making me nervous!" "Like, what crawled up her butt and died?" Hellhound wondered. Rooster Destructoid lunged at Bahamode Sigma, firing again. Spectrum blocked the blasts, but then the shield transducers shorted and blew out as Rooster tackled the Sigma, bearing it to the ground. "Spectrum, are you all right?" Summer asked, shaking her (Bahamode Sigma's) head to regain her bearings. "Yeah, I'm >KOFF< just dandy down here. >KOFF, KOFF< Damn cockpit's just full of smoke, that's all..." "Good." Summer drew a leg up under the Destructoid and kicked it off, sending it a few dozen yards back. As she got Bahamode Sigma to its feet, however, a lucky shot from the Destructoid's main gun knocked the fusion cannon out of its hand. "Let's see how well they do without their gun!" Superchick announced. "Activate the secondary weapon!" Mike yelled. "Right!" Summer responded. "Bahamode Sigma--FORM BLAZING SWORD!!!" "Powering up!" Spectrum shunted more energy down the Bahamode battloid's right arm. "I can't believe she said that," Adam muttered as the right arm of the Sigma grasped a silver cylinder attached to the wrist of the left arm, detached it, drew it out. A fifteen-foot glowing blade formed from the end of it, and Bahamode Sigma momentarily posed dramatically. "GIT THEM!!!" Rooster D. Structoid lunged forward. Bahamode Sigma countered by flipping open panels all over all five of its mecha segments and firing a cloud of minimissiles. "AIIIEEEEEE!!!" Rooster staggered back, enveloped in a cloud of explosions. "En garde, you bastards!" Adam raised the sword and slashed downward. But then Reaper's arm blades met and parried the sword blade, and a glowing sword to match Bahamode Sigma's extended from its hand. Sword met sword with a resounding CLANG!!! "Wait a minute," Mike said. "Why would two laser swords make a resounding 'CLANG!!!'?" "Don't ask me, take it up with the foley guy!" Adam responded, swinging again. [Note: In this case, 'foley' does not refer to the Congressic Park critter but to the set of devices used to create sound effects for most movies and cartoons. See ROBOTECH ART III by Carl Macek for an excellent description of the foley and its job.] Just then, Dr. Science's sensors fell into line, and everything beeped. "I've found it! I've found the weak point! Eureka!!!" "Don't just sit there, doc, tell us what it is!" Adam replied. "The left knee! I'm routing sensor data through to your targeting systems now." Summer dutifully accepted the data and sent it where it needed to go, almost without thinking. "That's--urgh!--very nice, doc...now if I can just HIT the thing..." Adam's every move was blocked before he could get to the knee. And so Rooster and Sigma fought back and forth, swords clanging in thrust and counterthrust, parry and riposte. Bahamode Sigma was not able to land a decent blow on Rooster D. Structoid, however, but Rooster managed to get in several good cuts on Sigma. The Mighty Muddy Power Grangers' experience and powers compensated for Team M.E.C.H.A.'s superior technology and energy source. "This is getting us nowhere," Mike realized. "We have to do something!" Summer was coming to the same conclusion. As a slash from Rooster Destructoid shattered the optic shield on Sigma's head, sending the Bahamode battloid staggering backward, she gasped in pain. *I need more power!* she thought. *More and more...power!* The subvocalization was so strong that Spectrum felt it somehow, and increased his power output almost subconsciously. Along with his output of electrical energy, his output of psychic energy grew as well. As Summer received the surge of power through the cables, and the surge of psychic energy through the mental control system, she felt herself growing stronger and called for more. "Bahamode Sigma--FULL POWER!!!" And Spectrum gave it. And then...something happened. The psychic energy interchange between Summer and Spectrum grew stronger, more powerful, faster, continuous, until it became less an interchange than a connective circuit. And the individual entities known as Summer and Spectrum began to fade. Summer realized, *This...is synchronization!* before she and Spectrum were gone, replaced by the single unit that called itself Bahamode Sigma. Giving up on any chance of taking part in the battle, Chance Vennt and Zen Navigator returned to Zen's psychedelic minibus. They opened the doors and climbed in. Chance sighed. "Another attempt at superherohood goes down the toilet." "Do not fret, Chance," Zen Navigator said. "We shall find another opportunity soon enough. After all, am I not ZEN NAVIGATOR!!!?" Whatever Chance had been about to say was interrupted by a loud POP! from directly behind him that made both him and Zen Navigator jump. Chance and Zen both turned their heads and looked around the inner corners of their respective seats--to notice a well-endowed blonde from the California Professional Gum-Chewing Team lounging across the seat behind them. She had a wad of bubble gum in her mouth, and the skin-tight bodysuit she wore left little to the imagination. "Hi, guys!" she said. "Eek!" Chance said. "What are you doing here?!" "I'm going to come along with you guys!" she said brightly. "You're WHAT?!" Chance said. "No way! Absolutely not!" "Why not?" Zen asked. "Because the last thing we need is--is--one of THEM!" Chance sputtered. "One of what?" the woman asked, sitting up. "One of 'those dumb blondes?'" "Er--" Chance said. "Let me tell you something, mister! Just because I'm blonde doesn't mean I'm dumb. I'll have you know that the reason I was on the Professional Gum-Chewing Team was to earn money for my education!" "Education?" Chance asked. "Yeah!" the blonde replied. "I'm training to be a masseuse!" Zen and Chance looked at each other. "A masseuse?" Chance asked. She nodded. "Yeah!" She paused, noticed the way Zen and Chance were exchanging glances, and quickly added, "And an astronaut." "An astronaut," Chance repeated. The blonde nodded. "Yeah!" "Er...right," Chance said. "Whatever you say." "By the way, my name is Sheri Brown," the woman said. "Nice to meet you, Sheri!" Zen Navigator said, turning back to the wheel. "So, where do we go now?" Chance asked. Zen shrugged. "Who knows? Who cares? After all, as a very wise man once said, no matter where you go, there you are!" Chance sighed. "Ask a silly question." Before the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers' astonished eyes, energy began to crackle over the besieged Bahamode Sigma. This energy played over the damaged areas--the shattered glass, the mangled armor, the charred components--and where it touched, the damage was undone, the components repaired as good as new. "Huh huh huh that's cool! huh huh huh," Hellhound laughed nervously. "Heh heh heh cool, yeah! heh heh heh," Reaper echoed. "What's gotten INTO that thing!" SuperChick breathed in awe. "Whut?" Mule said. "What the hell (TM)?!" Adam asked as Bahamode Sigma stopped responding to his controls. "Summer? Spectrum?" Mike was similarly worried. He punched for a status display. "Summer? Are you okay?" But Summer and Spectrum were not individually conscious at the moment, and thus did not answer him. "What's going on?!" "I'm not sure..." Dr. Science replied. "But the indicators I'm getting on life-support are rather...interesting." "Interesting HOW?" Mike asked. "I'm not sure how to explain this, but there appears to be some kind of a feedback loop established between Summer and Spectrum in the neural control interlock system. It's almost as though..." "As though WHAT, doc?" Adam asked. "As though they were jointly operating Bahamode Sigma through thought transferrence into a type of controlling gestalt." "English, doc?" Sarah Conner interjected. "They're mentally--" SuperChick decided she'd allowed enough time for internal dialogue. "DIE!!!" she screamed, lunging Rooster D. Structoid at Bahamode Sigma. But, moving more smoothly and rapidly than before, Sigma nimbly ducked out of the way, and slashed Rooster up the side with its laser sword in passing. "Ghaaa!!!" SuperChick screamed, crashing through another building. Bahamode Sigma walked through after it, tossing chunks of rubble aside in order to get to it. The Destructoid clambered to its feet just in time to be belted in the beak by Bahamode Sigma, and knocked back through the other wall to land on its kiester. Sigma walked through the ruins of the other wall and grabbed Rooster D. Structoid by the neck, lifted it partially off the ground. "Somebody DO something!!!" Superchick yelled, control panels blowing out all around her. "Whut?" "Shut up, Mule!" "Huh huh huh huh huh...They're choking our chicken...huh huh" "Heh heh heh heh heh cool heh heh heh." The Destructoid's arms flailed around, and Hellhound triggered a full-intensity burn at Bahamode Sigma's chest. It didn't even singe the armor. Bahamode Sigma lashed out again, its punch severely jarring Superchick and knocking Rooster D. Structoid back another dozen feet or so. Then Bahamode Sigma strode up to where the Destructoid lay amid the dirt and rubble, and raised its sword triumphantly. "No!!! Stop him! Do something!" SuperChick yelled frantically, punching buttons and pushing levers but eliciting no response. "Whut?" Then Sigma's sword plunged downward, landing directly in Rooster Destructoid's left knee. Sparks shot out, and lightning crackled around first the leg, then the entire Destructoid. "No!!! This can't be happening!!!" SuperChick gasped. "It's gonna 'splode!" Bull realized. "Punch out!" Four panels blew open on the torso, arms, and right leg of the Destructoid, and four chairs rocketed out. "Whoa, huh huh, this is COOL! huh huh huh," Hellhound remarked as they flew through the air. "What abaht Mule?!" SuperChick asked. "Whar is he?!" And then Rooster D. Structoid exploded in a brilliant fireball, the kind of immolation that tends to be seen in anime that whites out the entire screen and often causes playback of 2nd and 3rd generation copies to glitch. Bahamode Sigma just stood there and let the explosion wash over it, dramatically posing amid the ruined buildings. The explosion faded, leaving Bahamode Sigma standing there, and Mule, his costume in tatters, wandering dazedly around in the crater made by the blast. It took a moment for Team M.E.C.H.A. to understand that they had won. Then realization came. "Yay!" "We can't let the Grangers get away!" Sarah Conner said. "Initiating auto-separation!" "Sarah, wait--" Mike said, but Sarah had already pulled the lever. The five Bahamodes split apart, separating and reconverting into their individual component units. The head shifted and morphed back into Summer's unconscious human body, which would have fallen to the ground if Mike hadn't caught it in one hand of his Bahamode and an equally unconscious Spectrum in the other, and lowered them to the ground. "Hey, are you guys okay?" Mike asked as they began moving again. "Oh...my head..." Summer said. "What happened?" "I don't know, but I feel like I've just been put through a blender," Spectrum remarked. "Last thing I remember is gating in more energy, and then..." He trailed off. "I think we'd better go stop the Grangers before they get away," Link said. "Mike, you stay here with your sister and Spectrum, and take care of Mule. The rest of us will handle the others." "Wait a minute," Spectrum said, drawing on his healing factor to dispel the headache. "I'll come with you." "Huh huh huh did you SEE that? It like, blew up! That was COOL, huh huh huh." "Heh heh heh yeah. FIRE! Heh heh heh heh." "Will you jest SHET UP!!!" Pinto Sally yelled. "Come on, let's get outta here 'fore they come after us." "She said 'come'," Hellhound said. "Huh huh huh." "Heh heh heh heh," Reaper added. Bull intervened before SuperChick could blow her top. "Wha'bout Mule? We jes' gonna leave him?" "We'll be back for him later," SuperChick replied. "'Sides, he's too stupid for being 'rested to bother him much anyway. C'mon, we's got us plans to make." And then a gleaming power armor unit touched down in front of them. It oriented its cannon at them. "Whoa!" Hellhound said, preparing to fire-- "FIRE!!!" Reaper said. "FIRE!!! heh heh heh." Marie's flamethrowers went off, but fortunately they were nearly out of fuel and didn't hurt anyone. "Reaper, you wuss, shut up and stop interrupting the narrator." "Sorry. Heh heh heh." Pinto Sally unzipped her skin-tight bodysuit to her navel, revealing her ample cleavage, intending to pull a "Cannonball Run" on the pilot of the armor suit. But then the armor's visor slid up to reveal a woman's face. "Sorry, but somehow I just don't think you're my type," Marie said. "Grrr!" SuperChick growled, zipping back up. "Get her!" "Not so fast!" Four Bahamodes touched down, surrounding the Grangers, and a slim power armor suit soon followed. It was Spectrum! Marie hastily slid her visor back down before he could see her. "Good work--whoever you are," Spectrum said. "Tor--Tornado," Marie said. "I--Thank you!" Her voice was slightly filtered by her helmet--Spectrum didn't seem to recognize it. "No problem." Spectrum grinned. "Since you seem to be female, why don't you tag along to keep an eye on SuperChick? Her powers only work on men, y'know." "Of course!" Marie said, ignoring the navigation charts and displays that suddenly appeared on her HUD. "Great, thanks!" As he turned to go, Spectrum wondered why Tornado sounded so familiar... This is it! Marie told herself. You're here, there's Spectrum, say whatever it is you're gonna say! But all of a sudden, she couldn't remember any more. So, wordlessly, she went ahead and followed Spectrum and the others, heading back toward the clearing where Mike and Summer sat. As they arrived, so did someone else. Or someONES else. It was a mobile infantry squadron, clad in camo fatigues, with packs on their backs and rifles on their shoulders. Except for a few of them who carried Betacams instead. Mike gasped, and reconverted his motorcycle-mode Bahamode into a battloid. "TONN troops!" he called out over the external speakers. "We don't want to fight you, but we will if we have to..." The soldier in the lead ran up to stand in front of Mike's mecha and saluted. "Sgt. Shana Shannon, FEMsquad commander and TONN fashion reporter! We're not here to fight you." She was tall, brunette, and wore dark shades and a headset in addition to her camos. Mike slid the head forward and stood up. "'FEMsquad?'" he asked. "FEMsquad. Females, Effective Militarily," Sgt. Shannon replied. "We're here to take charge of the prisoners and transport them to the Really, Really Hard-to-Get-Out-of Place." Looking at the squad, which appeared to be made up of about twenty or thirty women, Mike nodded. "I guess you heard about SuperChick's power, then." Shana nodded. "TONN archive footage." "Ah," Mike said. "For a moment there I thought you were going to say you'd read it in the Weekly World Schmooze." Sgt. Shannon looked disgusted. "Never touch the thing. It's a competitor." Mike shrugged. "All right, then. They're all yours." Shana smiled coldly, and for a moment Mike was a bit unsure of his decision. "Good." She gestured to her soldiers. "Secure the area!" The TONN troops spread out. Some moved to guard the Grangers, others to grab whatever pieces of Rooster D. Structoid were still intact. Then Mike's attention was drawn to a low groan emanating from one of the wrecked buildings. "Oh my gosh, I forgot all about him! Space Moose!" A piece of the rubble shifted, and a hoof/hand poked out from under it. Then a three-foot snout poked up from under another piece. "Ooooooh..." the Heroic Herbivore groaned. "Hey, guys, get over here and help me move this!" Leaving the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers in TONN's capable hands, the rest of Team M.E.C.H.A. and Spectrum came over to shift rubble. As the others lifted and pulled, Spectrum manipulated gravitic energies so that the rubble flew away from where it was piled up. In no time at all, the concrete and wood had been cleared away to reveal a somewhat shopworn Space Moose. "Are you all right?" Spectrum asked. The Antlered Avenger brushed himself off. "Ooooh...did anyone get the registry number of that star cruiser?" he groaned. He shook his head to clear it. "What happened? Did I miss anything?" "The Mighty Muddy Power Grangers knocked you for a loop," Mike said. "But we stopped them cold," he added proudly. "Me and my team. Team M.E.C.H.A., the greatest hero team a guy could hope to command." Space Moose stood up. "I am indeed happy for you, my friends. I only wish that I could have seen it--" "TONN cameras recorded the whole event," Shana Shannon broke in. "Expect to see it on pay-per-vue within a week or so." "Er, right." The Moose of Might continued. "Now, if I could just find my own teammates--" "Space Moose! What have you done to the MooseWing?!" Benedict Arnold's voice conveyed as much annoyance and distress as it was possible for a Dalek voice to contain. "It should be right over there--" Space Moose pointed. Mike helpfully turned him around so he was pointing in the right direction. "--over there. Thank you, Mike. Why don't you go and find out?" Adapting something of a martyred air, a difficult thing for a Dalek but somehow Benedict managed it quite well, the Dalek rolled off in search of the all-but-destroyed aircraft. Mike took a moment to glance around at the rest of the team. "Okay, so we've stopped the Grangers, destroyed their mecha, and saved Bob City," he said. "What do we do now?" Before someone could break in with the obligatory, "We're goin' to Disneyland!" Spectrum said, "We have a party, what else?" "Hey, yeah! We can invite everyone!" Summer said. "Tornado, Space Moose, Shana Shannon, everybody!" "I shall certainly make every effort to be there!" Space Moose said. "And so will Clyde, if he's up to it by then." "I'll be there, too, if TONN permits," Shana Shannon added. "It would make a good news event." "Hey, like weren't you one of the Gorgeous Ladies of Female Wrestling?" Hellhound said to the TONN FEMsquad soldier who was guarding him. IS THIS THE END OF THE BOB CITY MEGACROSSOVER? "No, there's still the party post, and individual wrapups to take place separately in each of the member series." OH, THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME. WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO THE MIGHTY MUDDY POWER GRANGERS AT THE HANDS OF TONN? IT WON'T BE ANYTHING TOO UNETHICAL, WILL IT? WILL CHANCE E. VENNT EVER GET A REPUTATION AS A SUPERHERO? WILL ZEN NAVIGATOR EVER GET A CLUE? WILL WE FIND OUT MORE ABOUT SHERI BROWN? IS SHE REALLY IN TRAINING TO BE AN ASTRONAUT, OR DID SHE JUST SAY THAT SO SHE WOULDN'T LOOK LIKE ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE "DUMB BLONDES?" IS SHERI RELATED TO LAWRENCE BROWN, OR TO BEN BROWN? "No. Most definitely and emphatically not. At least, not at this juncture. She also isn't related to Charlie Brown, bad, bad Leroy Brown, Julie Brown, or most other Browns in existance...it's just a common name, live with it." WHO WAS THE UNSHAVEN, FEDORAED (Is that a word?) INDIVIDUAL IN THE GRUMMAN GOOSE? WHO WAS HIS SHORT, ASIAN COMPANION? WAS IT JUST COINCIDENCE THAT RADIOACTIVE ACETONE HAPPENED TO SPILL ON ONE OF THE LADIES OF THE CALIFORNIA PROFESSIONAL GUM-CHEWING TEAM? WAS THE TONN GUARD ONE OF THE GORGEOUS LADIES OF FEMALE WRESTLING? YOU MAY ACTUALLY FIND SOME OF THIS OUT. OR PIGS COULD FLY. SUPERGUY. IT'S WHAT'S FOR DINNER. -- Chris Meadows | Robotech_Master's First Law of Superguy: CHM173S@NIC.SMSU.EDU | Continuity is Overrated. CMEADOWS@NYX.CS.DU.EDU | Robotech_Master's Corollary: ...but sometimes CMEADOWS@NOX.CS.DU.EDU | necessary all the same. ========================================================================= Date: Mon, 21 Feb 1994 17:59:05--0600 Reply-To: UCF SUPERGUY List Sender: UCF SUPERGUY List From: Robotech_Master Subject: SG: Crapshoot #5: Bubble Gum Crisis CRAPSHOOT #5: BUBBLE GUM CRISIS By Robotech_Master, Who's Just About Overused That Joke To paraphrase John Steakley in VAMPIRE$: This Chance is no other Chance. This Sheri is no other Sheri (or Shari, for that matter). Bob. City of a thousand stories and four or five Authors. City of perpetual heroic destruction. City of dampness. On the outbound freeway, hundreds of cars, trucks, and other assorted vehicles left the town. Some of the drivers had simply had it with all the destruction and were determined to go somewhere that was less of a supervillain magnet. Others were sick of the perpetual rain and were heading somewhere that was a bit drier, perhaps India in the monsoon. And others, like Zen Navigator, were simply lost. "Do not worry!" Zen remarked. "If it is California you want, then we shall go to California!" "Why did you just, like, take the exit that said Maine, then?" Sheri (Not Shari) Brown asked. "Because he's--" Chance began. "ZEN NAVIGATOR!!!" Zen finished. Chance rolled his eyes. "Whatever you say," Sheri (Not Shari) said. "Anywhere's fine with me, actually. I'm just sick of bubble gum." "Why are you still chewing it, then?" Chance pointed out. "Force of habit," Sheri (Not Shari) replied, blowing a bubble and popping it. "So, what are we going to do while we get where we're going, wherever that is?" "We could play the license plate game," Zen Navigator suggested. "Umm...right," Chance said. As it happened, Zen and friends cruised the whole day without leaving Bob City. They stopped for dinner in a truckstop/diner on one of the interstates that passed through Bob City on the way to somewhere else. Zen and Chance had gotten into a minor argument along the way, which still continued. "It had Venutian plates, I tell you!" Zen Navigator insisted. "I've seen them before!" "No way," Chance said. "No way in this world--" "It wasn't FROM this world, it was from Venus!" Zen Navigator continued. "Boys, would you knock it off?" Sheri asked. "You're giving me a headache, and everyone else in the diner is looking at us." Chance glanced over at Sheri. "No, they're looking at YOU, and the reason they're looking has nothing to do with what we're talking about." "Why you--" "Hey there, little lady," a rough-looking truck driver remarked, sitting down beside Sheri (Not Shari). "These guys bothering you?" "Uh, no," Sheri said. "I--" "Why don't you'n'me go over to that table there and talk?" the truck driver suggested. "No thanks," Sheri said. "I don't think I'd like to do that--" "The lady said no," Chance remarked, lifting a partially-melted spoon from the bowl of chili he was eating to gesture at the man with it. "Why don't you go look for someone else to leer at?" "Why don't you shut up, shorty?" The truck driver lashed out with his fist, but missed by a hair. He swung again, and similarly missed. Zen glanced up from his dinner. Another truck driver called out, "Hey, Hank, maybe he's too good for you!" "No, he's just LUCKY, that's all. I'll fix him!" The truck driver backed up, got a running start, and proceeded to try to tackle Chance. However, he missed, due to Sheri planting a perfectly-formed leg in his path and tripping him. He ended up face-down in Chance's chili. "Ah, well, it wasn't all that appetizing anyway," Chance decided, pushing back his stool. Zen nodded. "Check, please!" Hank the truck driver pushed himself up and out of the chili. "Now I'm MAD." "Now you need a better dialogue writer," Zen Navigator remarked, putting on his hat. Chance stepped back from the counter. "I don't want any trouble..." he began. "Well tough, you've GOT it!" Hank lunged. However, his foot slipped on the floor and he ended up clutching Chance's knee rather than his neck. Chance wrenched his foot free. "Better give up, guy. You can't beat me, y'know." "Just let me get my hand on you and we'll see--WHOA!!!" The man had attacked again and Chance, who by now was somewhat fed up, had executed a judo throw. The trucker landed on the diner counter and slid down it, knocking several other truckers' dinners in their laps. "Hey!" "Why that--" "Let's get 'em!" "Uh-oh..." Chance had time to say before he and Zen Navigator were gang-tackled. Sheri (Not Shari) Brown edged back, hands over her mouth. Then she bumped into something. She looked up. It was Hank. She screamed. "Now, little lady, why don't you and me--" Sheri wrenched herself away from Hank's grasp. "Get AWAY from me!" she screamed. She looked around for something, anything, with which to defend herself. Then she felt something in her hand, and she threw it. BLAT! Hank went down, hands clawing at the huge mass of sticky bubble gum that covered his face. Sheri looked down at her hand. It was covered in bubble gum, too. "Eww, gross!" Sheri gasped. "Yuck! How am I going to get this off?!" And then it disappeared. It seemed to ooze down into her pores and vanish. "What the hell (TM)?" Meanwhile, the melee between the truck drivers and Chance and Zen was still going on. Chance had managed to knock a couple out, and Zen was managing to hold his own, but more truck drivers were pouring in (where did they all come from?) and Sheri knew they couldn't hold out for much longer. Then Sheri felt something like pressure building up inside of her. She pointed her arm at one of the truck drivers experimentally, and concentrated on releasing whatever that pressure was. And a stream of bubble gum blasted out from her arm and wrapped around the truck driver. Sheri yanked on it, and he fell over backward. "Hey!" "Like, wow!" Sheri remarked, reverting to a "Valley Girl" accent as she tended to do when she got really excited. "This is, like, totally radical!" She fired another stream of gum and struck another truck driver in the face. "It's kinda fun, too!" A couple of minutes later, Chance and Zen found that there weren't any more truckers left to fight. "Eh?" Chance wondered. Then he noticed the truck drivers everywhere--truck drivers on the floor, truck drivers on the stools, truck drivers stuck to the ceiling--and the bubble gum that was festooned all over the place. "Uh, guys," Sheri (Not Shari) said weakly. "I really think we'd better get out of here. I'll explain on the way." Sheri and Chance ran, and Zen Navigator limped a little, out to the van. "Are you all right?" Sheri asked Chance and Zen. "I'm okay," Chance said. "But I think Zen got hit some." Indeed Zen had. Zen, it seemed, had taken all the punches meant for both of them, and was looking a little shopworn. Zen was also beginning to see the dangers of travelling with one who was a luck magnet. "I'll be all right," Zen said stoically. "Provided, that is, we depart the vicinity immediately." He gestured to the squad cars moving up the road. "Right." Chance and Sheri climbed into the side doors of the microbus, and Zen took the driver's seat. The ignition caught, Zen shoved it into gear, and they moved off down the road. "So, what was that you did with the bubble gum?" Chance asked as they moved up the damp road. "I don't know," Sheri (Not Shari) replied. "It was really weird, y'know? I don't know HOW I did it, or even exactly what it was I DID." "You seem to be able to create bubble gum out of thin air," Zen Navigator observed, flashing his turn signal and then turning. "No, not out of thin air...out of my body, somehow..." She rolled down the window of the psychedelic minibus and held out her hand. She tried again, and was able to feel the pressure building up within her. She let it go...and a jet of bubble gum flew from her hand and wrapped around a nearby lamppost. "Wow! You've got superpowers!" Chance said. "But how?" "It might have been that glowing acetone that fell on her, but not on any of the others who were trapped in that gumwad," Zen Navigator suggested. "Hey, yeah! That's as good an explanation as any," Chance decided. "Sheri? You okay?" "I--guess so," Sheri said, somewhat nonplussed. "What am I going to do with these powers?" "Become a superhero, of course!" Chance said, as if there wasn't any doubt. "Like me and Zen here!" "Like you...and Zen?" Sheri peered doubtfully at the minibus's driver. "Okay, okay, like me, then," Chance replied. "So...what'll we call you? Hey, I know!" "Don't you DARE suggest 'Bubblegum Crisis,' Sheri said, stretching a large wad of gum suggestively garotte-like between her hands. "Er...all right," Chance said. "What, then...Bubblegum Girl? Bubblegum Woman? Zen, what do you think?" Zen Navigator shrugged. "I don't really care, Chance--just as long as she doesn't get any on the upholstery..." WILL SHE GET ANY ON THE UPHOLSTERY? WILL CHANCE AND ZEN BE ABLE TO COME UP WITH A SUITABLE SUPERHEROINE-TYPE HANDLE? WILL THEY EVER FIND THEIR WAY OUT OF BOB? WILL THE STORY GET INTERESTING SOMETIME SOON? WHAT WILL AMIGOID SAY? SOME OF THIS STUFF, POTENTIALLY, UPCOMING IN FUTURE INSTALLMENTS OF -----SUPERGUY---^v^v^v^v^v-^v--^v----^v--------^v------------------------- -- Chris Meadows | Robotech_Master's First Law of Superguy: CHM173S@NIC.SMSU.EDU | Continuity is Overrated. CMEADOWS@NYX.CS.DU.EDU | Robotech_Master's Corollary: ...but sometimes CMEADOWS@NOX.CS.DU.EDU | necessary all the same. ========================================================================= Date: Tue, 22 Feb 1994 03:04:42--0500 Reply-To: UCF SUPERGUY List Sender: UCF SUPERGUY List From: dpawtows@VT.EDU Subject: SG: Space Moose #15: On a Wing and a Cow Desperately wishing for a good pizza, Go Go Gadget Keyboard presents... SPACE MOOSE #15 or It's been a harrrrrd day's Dalek or It's a Moooo, Moooo, Moooo, Moooooo, Moooooo World! A lonely cylinder rolled across the streets of Bob City, following an antler-shaped trail of destruction carved across the faces of the deserted downtown skyscrapers. Periodically pausing to find his way around some particularly tall piece of rubble, or to inflate pontoons to cross a particularly deep river, Benedict moved unerringly towards his goal. He soon found it. The MooseWing. Or rather, what was left of it. It had been in pretty bad shape when he'd left it, back at the airport, only a few hours previously. And that was before Space Moose had called up those ancient designs and rebuilt it as part of...that...THING. The Dalek had worked out the initial plans for a giant MooseForm Mecha many months previously, when he was first designing the equipment to be used by Space Moose and himself in their quest to-...But that had been before analysis had determined that the lead craft in the bay could be made flightworthy, and a fighter had suited their needs better than a ground based machine. At least those plans had used suitable parts. What Space Moose and this "Tornado" had done was indescribable. They'd torn out the undercarriage to make room for connection equipment. The computers had been either disassembled, smashed, or..._welded_? The wings had been nearly torn off from repeated use as battering rams, a tactic only Space Moose would consider. How it had held together as long as it had against the Rooster was a mystery that his probability banks refused to perform calculations on. But what had happened was irrelevant. The task at hand was to somehow return this crumpled mass of Mooseian metal to the air. As if on cue, the sound of reaction thrusters broke the Dalek out of his trancelike state (not that any observers, hypothetical or otherwise, could tell). "Hey! We could at least guess!" said the first hypothetical observer. "Yeah, he stood still for almost fifteen seconds!" said the second. Er, guys, you don't want to surprise a Dalek when he's feeling depressed like this. "Why not?" "SPIES!!! EXTERMINATE!!!!" "Oh, that's why not." *ZAP* *ZING* *ZORCH* After a momentary distraction, Benedict turned towards the source of the engine noise--a rather familiar looking Alpha Veritech fighter, skating down the road towards him in Guardian Mode. Benedict switched to a common frequency he had monitored earlier. "Request identification confirmation. You are Sterling?" "That's a roger. Ray Sterling, Robotech Expeditionary Force. You're Space Moose's friend Benedict, right?" "Affirmative." Ray brought his plane to a stop just short of the MooseWing's wreckage and knelt it down, popping his canopy open. "Saw you head off this way earlier, figured you were going after your mecha. Looks like you found it." He leapt from the cockpit to stand next to the Dalek. "Looks like the Grangers really pounded this thing." Benedict nodded his eyestalk sadly. "Affirmative." Ray blinked, noticing the deep grooves and dents in the cyborg's side. "And somebody did a number on you, too. You okay?" "I am functional. The MooseWing is not." "Can you fix it?" "Negative. Insufficient local facilities. Damage is extensive, repairs require re-location to MooseLodge." "Oh, I get it." Ray kicked part of the fuselage gently. "You can't fix it here in Bob City, but you could back at your base." "Affirmative." "Only you can't get it to your base, since it can't fly." "Affirmative." Ray looked down at the shattered fuselage again, then up at his own mecha. "There's no reason we can't help each other. This thing looks heavy, but I think my Battleoid could lift it. How about if I carry it back for you?" Benedict swiveled his eyestalk up from the MooseWing to the Alpha, then down to Ray. "Negative. The location of MooseLodge must remain secret. The offer is..." the Dalek paused to search his vocabulary, "...appreciated." "Er, you're welcome, I guess." Ray wondered briefly if he should be insulted or not. After all, they had both nearly been killed fighting the Grangers. If the Dalek wouldn't trust him, then who would he... "Ray Sterling." Benedict interrupted Ray's line of thought, "Perhaps you can be of assistance." "Whatcha got in mind, tin-can?" "The MooseWing is equipped with an...emergency drive system. It is part of the original vehicle, mounted between the main fuselage spars directly aft of the cabin." "I see...that part doesn't seem to have taken much damage. Maybe it still works. What kind of drive?" "It is..." Benedict paused again, searching for words, "a pulse-jet system, utilizing a series of explosive charges detonated against the rear armor plate." "Geez, that's primitive. Sounds like something meant more for use in space, though." "Affirmative." Benedict paused to run through some calculations. "Your supposition is correct, the system will be insufficient in gravity. Additionally, the vehicle lacks the necessary detection avoidance capability." "Detection avoidance? Oh, I get it. The MooseWing had Stealth gear, to keep anyone from tracking it back to MooseLodge, didn't it?" "Affirmative. The electronic warfare systems appear completely nonfunctional." Spurred on by an impulse to check, Benedict rose up on his replusor-lift hover field and flew up into the shattered cockpit, scanning his eyestalk around sadly. Ray leaned back against his Alpha's nose, looking thoughtful. "You know, maybe there is something we can do..." he mused, hopping into his own cockpit and donning his helmet. Benedict had found one unbroken display screen near the pilot's seat, although nothing happened when he turned it on. No power. Perhaps, if he could run a feed to one of the batteries, he could at least get the self-diagnostics to... A tuft of fur caught on a screw near the remains of the nav panel caught his eye. A tuft that most definitely did not come from Space Moose. Benedict retracted his plunger-arm, and extended a small multi-fingered claw to remove the tiny clump of hair. "Preliminary analysis confirmed. Lemurs." He tucked the hair into a sample container built into his Dalek shell and elevated his gun, scanning the devastated cityscape. "Active scan for lemurs! Seek! Locate! Exterminate!!!" There wasn't so much as a "frink" for miles. However the lemurs had gotten into the plane, they were gone now. After a few more angry scans, he lowered his gun. Ray called out from his plane. "Don't give up the battlefortress yet, we may have something for you!" He again hopped down to the pavement as the Dalek looked confused. "We?" "I just got on the comm net and explained your problem to Dr. Odd Science. He says he's got an idea, and he'll be sending Spectrum over in a moment." "I do not understand, but I will wait." Benedict turned back to the MooseWing and stopped to wait. Ray sat down on a wing strut, wondering what was going through the mind of this escapee from the BBC...wait a minute, maybe if her really was... "Say Benedict, you're a Dalek, right?" "Affirmative." "You're basicly the same as those guys on that British T.V. show, 'Doctor Who', right?" "Affirmative" Benedict bristled slightly. "What is the purpose of these questions?" "I was wondering...if, maybe...are you from the Television Dimension?" "Negative. I do not understand." "Sorry, just wondering if you knew a way back...Oh look, here comes Spectrum now." Ray stood up and waved as the bright metallic superhero flew in and landed nearby. Spectrum smiled and waved. "So here you are, Ray. Trying to get outa work, eh?" "Spectrum, I'm here because..." "Just pulling your chain a little. Ah, hello! You must be Benedict, the Dalek." Somehow, Benedict looked relieved that Spectrum hadn't called him 'That friend of Space Moose'. "Affirmative. I am pleased to make your acquaintance. You are a very unique individual." "Er, thanks. Now, Dr. Science said you've got a problem with your...ACK! This thing is supposed to _fly_?" "It was." Benedict replied sourly. "I see why you need some help. Okay, let me get this straight. You've got a way to make it move, but not in Earth-normal gravity?" "Affirmative." "And you've got to cloak it from radar somehow?" "The stealth systems are effective on a wide range of sensor devices. However, a simple radar cloak would prove sufficient." "Gotcha. I think I can help you. Does this junkpile have any usable batteries left?" "Affirmative. The primary storage units from the APU are located near the main gear wells. They should be intact." "What's their storage capacity?" "In terrestrial units, approximately twenty megawatt-hours each." "Bingo. That should do the trick. Now all we gotta do is get at them. Any access panels topside?" "Negative. There were panels, but they are nonfunctional. I would advise the use of Lt. Sterling's mecha unit." "Good idea. Ray, you feeling up to some Battleoid exercises?" "All systems go. Stand back!" the pilot leapt back into his kneeling fighter and closed his canopy, quickly imaging it up from it's birdlike Guardian into the humanoid Battleoid mode. Spectrum and Benedict walked and rolled back from the MooseWing as Ray took a few giant-sized steps forward with his mecha. The battleoid leaned forwards and grasped the heavy, muzzle-shaped fuselage near the wing roots and heaved. His Protoculture-fired servos strained for a few moments before the massive armored bulk of the MooseWing rose up. Ray moved slowly, not wanting to inflict any more damage that necessary to the battered airframe. Nevertheless, the MooseWing had taken just too much--one of the mighty Antler-Wings groaned and finally fell completely off the plane. It clattered to the street with a dull rumble and a few splashes. "Oops. Sorry about that." said Ray over his speakers. "Er, I don't think that was your fault, Ray. Say, what's that..." Spectrum tilted his armored head, looking oddly at a newly revealed feature--when the wing fell off, it exposed another winglike structure that had been hidden beneath it. Or at least, it seemed to be another wing. Smaller and narrower that the antlerlike one, this one was shaped quite differently, almost like... "A cow? That thing looks like the horn of a farm cow." "Please disregard." said Benedict rapidly, "It is simply the internal structural member of the main wing. Lieutenant, please re-attach the antler." "I got it." Ray leaned one side of the MooseWing on his Battleoid's knee, freeing up his right hand to pick up the fallen wing. With a little delicate handwork, he managed to slip the antler back on over the smaller horn. Spectrum could swear he saw the Dalek somehow wince at the sound of rending metal as Ray pinched the wing root to keep it on. "That...will suffice." said Benedict, who hit his repulsor field to fly back up into the MooseWing's cockpit and pulled a mostly-intact lever. "Landing gear unlocked. Hydraulic power is not functional." "I think I can fix that." said Spectrum. "Ray, don't you dare drop that plane on me! I just got my armor cleaned up." The battlesuited hero walked under the MooseWing's torn belly and thrust his fingers into the partially opened main gear doors, levering them open easily. He then took the hydraulic lines in one hand and concentrated, channeling yet another form of energy through his body. Benedict watched a small light glow green on a backup display. "Hydraulic pressure positive. Lowering main gear...Main gear lowered. Main gear locked. Lieutenant, you may set this aircraft down." "Good. That thing is heavier than it looks." Ray gently set the MooseWing down onto the shredded tires of it's landing gear. Standing between the struts, Spectrum braced himself in case one buckled. They held, despite their obvious battle damage. "Man, this plane is built tough. Okay, Benedict, I see the batteries. You're right, they're intact. Stay up there, I'm gonna re-charge them for you." "I do not see how a restoration of electrical power will return this vehicle's functionality." "What made you think I was gonna recharge them with electricity?" "Explain." "In a moment. Odd suggested the idea, but I've never actually done this before..." Spectrum reached up to the left-side battery and removed the damaged clips from the terminals, gripping them with his hands. He concentrated for a few long moments, feeling within himself, trying to tap the interdimensional linkages in just the right...there, that should do it. Sparks crackled around his hands for a few moments. When he was done, Spectrum grabbed two twisted pieces of metal and molded them onto the terminals, bent so they just touched a nearby wing spar. "There. Ray, see if you can get an image of this thing on your scope." "What? But you're right in front of me." Ray called from his Battleoid. "Humor me." "Okay, here I...HEY! I'm not getting any return echo from that scrapheap. What gives?" "Simple. I charged this battery with anti-electromagnetic energy, and it's slowly discharging into the airframe." "Anti-electromagnetic energy?" Benedict sounded disbelieving. "That's nothing. Wait til you see what I've got up my other sleeve." It took Spectrum less than a minute to repeat the procedure on a second battery, although the sparks were of a distinctly different color. And when he was finished, the MooseWing began to drift gently off the ground... "Grab onto us, Ray! I don't think the good Dalek wants to go floating away just yet." "I gotcha...what'd you do this time?" "Charged the other battery with anti-gravitational energy." "Dohw!" "This does not correspond to any form of antigravity lift device in my databanks." Benedict looked out from the MooseWing's cockpit, "But this does fit within my estimates of your capabilities, Spectrum." "Thank you. I think. This should last about two hours before you run out of juice. Can you make it back to your place before then?" "Affirmative. Spectrum, Ray Sterling, thank you for your assistance." "You're welcome. Glad to help a another hero!." "Hey, can you make it back in time for the big pizza party tonight?" "That is uncertain, but the probability is high. Please stand back, I am engaging the pulsed detonation drive system." Not entirely sure what Benedict was talking about, but realizing that it didn't sound safe, Spectrum quickly retreated to what he hoped was a safe distance. Ray did likewise, backing his Alpha to the end of the block. Benedict somehow managed to close the remains of his own canopy, although there was precious little glass remaining in the plane's two enormous moose-eye-shaped windows. The MooseWing began to drift slowly off the pavement in a light breeze as soon as Ray let it go. It moved slowly--although weightless, Spectrum had done nothing to reduce it's inertia. Then, with a sound that seemed almost like a high-pitched "Mooooo," a curiously-shaped balloon began to inflate just aft of the main thruster exhaust ports. A balloon that looked, for some reason, like a... "It's an inflatable cow?" wondered Spectrum. "Not just that. My spectroscope's getting some odd readings. He's filling that thing with...methane. Not air." "Methane? Why would he want to..." *Mooooooooo* *BOOM* Spectrum's question was answered when the cow exploded. The resulting kick to the MooseWing's armor hurtled the craft forwards and upwards. Another cow-bomb was already inflating. This one was cut loose and pushed slightly to one side before detonation, imparting a slight sideways impulse that pivoted the crippled aircraft towards the north. With the muzzle pointed in the right direction, Benedict "opened the throttle," setting the exploding cows to rapid-fire. Behind him, Spectrum and Ray simply watched, their jaws agape. *Mooooooooo* *BOOM* "I don't believe this." *Mooooooooo* *BOOM* "It seems to be working so far." *Mooooooooo* *BOOM* "He's up to nearly three hundred miles per hour already..." *Mooooooooo* *BOOM* "...and still accelerating." *Mooooooooo* *BOOM* "Any idea how he's gonna land once he gets there?" *Mooooooooo* *BOOM* "Not a clue." *Mooooooooo* *BOOM* "Come on. Let's go see what Mike's up to." *Mooooooooo* *BOOM* WHAT IS MIKE UP TO???? EXPLODING COWS?!?!?!?! WHERE HAVE WE SEEN THIS BEFORE??????? HOW _WILL_ BENEDICT LAND???? WILL HE BE BACK IN TIME FOR THE PIZZA PARTY????? HOW _DOES_ A DALEK EAT PIZZA, ANYWAY????? FOR THAT MATTER, HOW DOES A DALEK EAT?????? WHAT ABOUT CLYDE????? WHAT ABOUT SPACE MOOSE????? WHAT ABOUT THEM?????? These any other questions will be answered at your next local presentation of "The Rocky Horror Picture Show," the next time it plays in a theater where the part of Rif-Raff is played by... SUPERGUY!!!!!!!!!!!! ========================================================================= Date: Wed, 23 Mar 1994 3:05:00 EST Reply-To: UCF SUPERGUY List Sender: UCF SUPERGUY List From: Chris Meadows Subject: SG: Team M.E.C.H.A. #35/Bob City Megacrossover #5 TEAM M.E.C.H.A. #35/Bob City Megacrossover #5 By Robotech_Master, ShadowyWriter, Gadge, and Amigoid (The Crossover Crew) Special Thanks to Rob Furr for providing hints on how to write in Bob, even if we didn't follow them very well (Sorry, Rob) All Our Readers (Yes, that's right, all three of you...) Superguy, because he's there A Story of High Technology, and High Blood-Alcohol Levels (Remember, kids, use a designated driver...) The party was taking place at a local jazz club, which had been rented especially for the event. The band (Best Big Band in Bob) alternated between playing old songs and new ones, and was currently in the middle of "In the Mood," one of Mike's favorite old songs. In one corner, a TONN Evening News/Urban Assault unit was setting up betacams and machine gun emplacements, under the more-than-capable direction of Shana Shannon. They looked quite determined to get the news. Mike just hoped he wasn't making a mistake by allowing this... Team M.E.C.H.A. was seated together at a table, sipping Mountain Dews and speculating on who was going to attend the celebration. It was actually open to anyone who wanted to come, though they hadn't advertised. They had told all of those people who had helped in defeating the Grangers to tell their friends, and had left a message on the Extreme Team's answering machine. It was only 5:30, and the party was officially set to open at 6:00. Spectrum had currently arrived, and Mr. Safety was walking around placing a ticket on each table that did not meet quality standards as set down in the 1942 Table Safety Code. Space Moose was still in the hospital, visiting Clyde, and Benedict had gone somewhere with the Moosewing. "Are you sure about this?" Summer asked. "I don't know if anyone's going to show up, even if they get the invitations." "Oh, they'll show up, no problemo," Sarah Conner said. "Bunzai's catering." "Bunzai? Awesome!" Summer said. "What's so special about Bunzai?" Mike wondered. "They only make the best pizza in the entire known universe, that's what," Summer said. "Ah." Mike checked his watch for the umpteenth time. "I guess they should begin arriving pretty soon, right?" "Hmph," Marie muttered, walking out of the torrential Bob City rains into the jazz club. Her Tornado armor had completely repaired itself since the battle with the Mighty Muddy Power Grangers, and she was feeling a whole lot better. The inevitable threat warnings popped up as she spotted Team M.E.C.H.A. and Spectrum, but she had learned by now to ignore them (the warnings, not the heroes). "Hey!" Shana Shannon said, hurrying up. "We're doing a bit for the Evening News about the battle with the Power Grangers, and we were wondering if we could talk to you..." "Er, no offense, but..." Marie said, staring wistfully at Spectrum over Shana's shoulder. Shana stepped back as Marie's offensive armaments audibly armed themselves. Panels slid open on her forearms, revealing her remaining micromissile supply. "Uh. Er," Shana managed to get out. "Uh." "Whups!" Marie grinned, looking embarrassed. "Damn. How do I deactivate these...Huh, they cut off. Weird." Shana rolled her eyes. "Just a few questions: First, where did you get the armor?" Marie paused, peering at Shana. Shana grinned. "It wouldn't happen to have come from, say, the TONN armories, would it?" Marie gulped. "H-how did you..." "It's got 'Property of That Other News Network' written on the palm of your right gauntlet." "Eep!" Marie said, checking. Yup, there it was. She wondered why Space Moose had never noticed. "Er. I got it because...because...uh, I'm on a secret mission!" "A secret mission?" Shana asked, raising an eyebrow. "Uh, yes. Uh, Gerbre ordered me to, uh, pretend to be a hero," Marie said, dropping her voice. "I'm supposed to get, uh, close to Spectrum, find out, uh, more about him..." "Really?" "Really." "You're not just putting me on, are you? I'd be highly annoyed," Shana said. "But...there was an authorization for someone to use a Tornado suit...Yes, it fits. I just didn't expect to run into any of our operatives here. Why did you fight the Grangers, anyway?! No mission's worth getting stomped to jelly over!" Marie shrugged. "Hey, sometimes you've just gotta do what ya gotta do..." "Hm," Shana said, pondering. She grinned evilly. "So, uh, how close are you supposed to get to Spectrum, anyway?" "What do you mean?" "You know what I mean!" Shana said, peering over at the hero. "Mmm...Looks like you lucked out on this mission!" "Er, right..." "Look, maybe I can help!" Shana said, pulling out one of her notepads and beginning to scribble on it. "I'll just jot down a few tricks I know--stuff that'd help you two when you hook up." "A 'few' tricks?" Marie asked, as Shana flew through ten pages of notes in amazingly rapid time. "Geez, where did you learn all that stuff?" "Sex Ed. in high school," Shana grinned. "You'd be amazed what the liberals allow people to teach these days." "High school?" Marie asked, bewildered. "Nevermind, I'd rather not know..." "Here y'go," Shana said, handing Marie the notebook. It was slightly warm to the touch--she had filled the entire thing with notes in less than two minutes. "Hm. I suppose I could use all the help I can get," Marie said, dropping the notebook into her Invid Green Standard-Issue Butt-Pack(tm). "Are you sure about this?" Gadge asked. "Sure, I'm sure!" Robotech_Master replied, stepping down to the curb and securely closing VTAS-1's door (hard enough so that it latched, but not hard enough that it was slammed). "Look, what's wrong with going to a party once in a while?" "The problem is that this is a party with all our characters in it. What if they RECOGNIZE us?" Gadge asked. "What are the chances of THAT happening?" Robotech_Master asked. "The odds of such an occurence are approximately--" Elma began, but broke off when she saw that Chris had already gotten out of speaking range. "Don't worry, Elma," Gadge said, stepping down. "I'm sure that nothing TOO bad is going to happen here. After all, I helped write this party..." "That is VERY reassuring," Elma said darkly. "Are you sure about this?" Chance asked. "Of course I am!" Zen Navigator replied, putting the minibus in "park." "We'll just go in here for a couple of minutes." "I don't understand why we're even going in at all," Sheri Brown (No, not THAT Sheri Brown, the OTHER Sheri Brown) said. "This is for people who fought the Grangers, right?" "Nominally--but it's actually for any superheroes who are in town." "But--" "Hey, Bulletproof went in about an hour ago, and he didn't do anything against the Grangers," Chance continued. Zen looked up. "Bulletproof went in an hour ago? How can you tell?" "The footprints are half-full of rainwater." Chance pointed at the indentations in the asphault. "Come on, let's go get out of this downpour." "Are you sure about this?" The Amigoid whispered. "Of course I am! I'm sick of hanging around the biodome. Actually, I'm sick of being sick, and its my birthday this weekend, and you promised to take me dancing. Besides, I wanted to see my altiversal counterpart and yours too." Sheri (yes, THAT Sheri Brown, not the OTHER Sheri Brown) hefted the pizza warmer case in her hands. "This is silly. Bunzai Pizza? Why not some other disquise? Anyway, she isn't your altiversal counterpart, it was a honest mistake, at least Robotech_Master said it was..." Sheri looked up. Across the room, she spotted the man who could be none other than Spectrum. "Yum. This is going to be fun. Remind me to double your exercise schedule when we get back. Now do your author thing, we don't want to be spotted." Marie hung out off to one side, sipping Zima through a straw (hey, it's Zomething different). She had opened up her visor just enough to let the straw in, and had locked it in place to assure that her identity was not discovered. A whole roomful of heroes--and more than half of them were technically her enemies. >blip!<, said her Protoculture detection grid. A map appeared on the left side of her visor, with three dots on it. One, in the center, was her suit. The other was Sterling's Veritech--it had been in close proximity for so long that her sensors now ignored it. And what?! It looked like a fourth dot appeared for a moment, then vanished. She would deal with the first anomaly first. She walked casually outside, looking skyward, and almost ran over two people coming in the door. "Hey! Watch it!" said one of them, a teenaged girl whose outfit practically screamed 'groupie'. She wore a shirt with, of all people, Ray Sterling's face on it. The other person was a bulky mechanic. "Er, excuse me," she said, trying to get around them. The blip on her detector was getting closer. "Hey!" the mechanic said, "Nice suit! Where'd you get it?" Marie glowered at him. "Er. Right. Uh, I'm Jake and this is Suzy, we're looking for Ray Sterling--he sent us a fax that there was a cool party going on, and..." "Over there," Marie said, pointing at the Robotech pilot. "Raaaaaaayyyyyyy!" Suzy yelled, flinging herself forty meters through the air to latch around Ray's neck. Jake shrugged and wandered over to the pilot. Marie ignored them, hurrying outside. Whatever this thing was, it was practically on top of her...Marie gaped as an Invid Royal Command Battloid landed in the parking area, crushing a pair of Pintos. "WAYNE!!" she bellowed. "Marie!" Wayne replied, leaping out of the cockpit, catching his foot on the Battloid's chest, and whapping face-first into the pavement. "You idiot! Why are you here?!" Marie yelled. "But, there was a party for all the people who fought the Grangers!" Wayne protested, "I, like, helped, y'know!" "Doooh...Ok, ok, but wear zomething az a dizguize." "Zomething?" "Err," Marie said. She noticed the bottle of Zima, still in her hand, and tossed it away. Wayne pulled out some fake plastic glasses, nose, and mustache, and put them on. "*sigh*" Marie sighed. Wayne took this as his cue to pull out some rather interesting substances. "Look at this," Wayne said, opening a small box, "You know that scientist dude, the one who, like, made the Slurpee/Protoculture converter? Well, he created these awesome artificial Flowers of Life, y'know? The stuff we, like, ate before we to, like, Earth?" "Wayne, if they're artificial...Have they been tested for ill effects?" "What?" "*sigh*. Ok, I'll try one," Marie sighed. Wayne handed her one and she popped her visor open for a minute to eat it. "Hm. Tastes ok, but I don't feel anything out of the ordinary." "Bogus!" Wayne said, "Guess I won't have any then...But I've got these joints..." Wayne lit up and the two wandered inside. "Jake!" Ray said, shifting Suzy, his one fan, to one side so he could talk. (c'mon, you *did* read the Ray Sterling miniseries, didn't you? sigh...) "Ray! How's everything going? Ever since you started hanging out with these Team M.E.C.H.A. guys, you haven't been in touch much...Heck, you haven't been in touch at all!" Jake replied, sounding slightly miffed. "Well, I have been rather busy," Ray said, experiencing a flashback- like effect that panned quickly through the events since he had left Detroit for Springfield, Virginia. Ray had barely been able to find more than a couple hours of free time...First the Springfield Battle, then Dr. Zwarghoff, and then the Power Grangers... "Too busy to drop a line to your old pal?" Jake hmph'd. "Looks like those Mech-boys were able to maintain your VT pretty well, tho'." "Yah," Ray said. He rather liked working with Team M.E.C.H.A.--he was a background character, and had been out of his element when he was forced to take a leading role. Being part of the group had appeal, but so did being on your own... "Sheesh," Jake said, distracted by Bulletproof's hulking suit. "There's some pretty heavy firepower hangin' around here...I'd give my right arm to examine some of the tech here...And what about that lady I ran into coming in here..." "The one in the chromed battlesuit?" Ray asked. "Yeah...She seemed a bit pre-occupied..." "Huh. You know, I swear I remember her from somewhere," Ray pondered, "Either that or the design of the battlesuit is familiar...I don't know...Strange that she's still wearing her battlesuit, though." "No weirder than wearing it all the time," Jake grinned, motioning at Bulletproof. Ray peered at the deep footprints the armored hero was leaving in the floor. "I'd hate ta have him pissed at me," Ray said, trying to pry Suzy off his neck. "Let's go get something to drink..." Once Zen, Chance, and Sheri (not THAT Sheri, the OTHER Sheri) had made it inside, the erstwhile heroes looked around. The room was rather large, with tables scattered hither and yon, and a large dance floor. In the corner, a band was providing background music, but it didn't seem anyone was dancing right now. As Sheri Brown (not THAT Sheri Brown, the OTHER Sheri Brown) entered, Wayne looked up from where he and Marie were sharing a cigarette that might have almost given Shadebeam a buzz. "Whoa," he said. He wasn't sure exactly why he said it, but something about Sheri Brown caught his eye. "Whoa," he said again. "What a--" He searched for the right word in his slightly clouded mind, but couldn't seem to find it. Sheri walked right past his table on her way to the refreshment stand, and Wayne took one last toke on the joint and then handed it off to Marie. "Eh?" Marie asked. "I'll be back," Wayne tossed over his shoulder. "That's what Arnie said," Marie replied, but got no response. Wayne followed Sheri through the crowd. Sheri reached the refreshment table without noticing the Stage 5 Invid right behind her. As she picked up a Mountain Dew and turned to go find a table, they ran into each other. "Oops!" Sheri said. "Sorry about that." "Whoa, hey!" Wayne said. "Bump into me any time you wanna!" His eyes defocussed slightly, though whether this was from the effect of what he was smoking or just of being this close to Sheri Brown was undeterminable. Sheri caught a scent of the smoke and felt a little dizzy. "Hey...what IS that stuff?" "Uh...um..." Wayne found himself at a loss for words. "Um...want some?" "No thanks..." Sheri said, trying to get around him. "Um...excuse me?" "Uh..." Wayne wondered why he couldn't seem to think of anything to say. Had to be the joint, he decided. "Hey, um, why don't you come sit over here?" "No thanks, I really have to--" She tried going around Wayne in the other direction, but he shifted position slightly and blocked her that way, too. "Hey, c'mon, I really think you're..." Wayne furrowed his brow as he tried to come up with the words. What WAS that term the humans used? "And I think you're in my way." Sheri fired a stream of bubble gum that wrapped around his waist, then threw it up to the ceiling over a rafter and hoisted him up about twenty feet off the ground. "Okay, there we go." She secured the gum, then walked away. "Whoa..." Wayne said, the word finally coming to him. "Whatta BABE!" "That's it!" Chance said. "Huh?" Sheri asked. "That's what we'll call you! Bubblegum Babe!" "Eh?" Sheri said. "Like, what kind of a name is that?" "Well, it's Californian...it suits you. What do you think?" Chance asked. "Hmm..." Sheri considered it for a moment. "Okay. Bubblegum Babe it is. Now I just have to think about a costume." She cracked open and guzzled the Mountain Dew. "Hey lady, we are out of that great Hawaiian Rum. Would you whip me up another one o'those great mixes?" Adam hiccuped. Sheri (yes THAT Sheri) scowled at him. "I'm a doctor, not a drinklayer!" Amigoid winced, and when nobody was watching, edited up another drink, handing it to Adam. "Here you go, sir. Thank you very much." Turning to his wife he whispered, "Ixnay, leave R_M's folks be! Look, I told you she wasn't anything like you. Don't take it out on the cast, you'll blow our cover." Somewhere off in the distance, a rhythmic, pulsing music started up. The Amigoid loooked up for a moment, unsure as to the source, then shrugged it off and sipped his drink. Jake hung out by the punch bowl, having drunk quite a bit of the stuff. "You shouldn't drink so much of that," Ray grinned, "you don't know what's in it..." "It's only punch," Jake said, pouring another cup. Overhead, Wayne struggled to get free of the bubblegum that held him suspended. A small packet was shaken loose from his pocket, and dropped into Jake's punch. "Bogus!" Wayne griped, "That was my other dose of those, like, arti...uh...arty...err...artifact...uhm...artificial! Like, artificial flowers of life! Dude, don't drink that!!" "Geez!" Jake said, peering up at Wayne, "What are you doing up there?" Sighing, he downed his cup of punch. "Aw, man," Wayne said, peering at the human below him. Boy was that guy in trouble--if the artificial Flowers of Life acted anything like the real ones... Jake opened his mouth and closed it again. After a few seconds, it fell open again and stayed there. Jake's right eye wandered right, while his left eye wandered left. His ears dimly registered that dull, pulsing music that seemed to be getting louder. "I think I need to sit down somewhere," Jake said in a distant tone of voice, as he focused on the end of his nose. "Hmph," Ray grumped, "Someone must've spiked the punch. You gonna be ok?" Jake sat down and nodded, then slapped himself. "I'll be fine, I just need to rest for a minute." The distant, only partly audible music was joined by a distant voice, a series of clear voices that seemed to be singing a single note in tune to the music: "ooooooOOOOooooOOOooooOOooOO..." "Huh. You feel weird, just tell me," Ray said, "I'll be right over there..." Robotech_Master and Gadge, in normal, civilian clothing, were circulating among the party. Chris, as he always did at parties, had gravitated to the food tables, and was sipping some of the punch. Gadge, with nothing better to do, had tagged along. "So, Chris, are you about ready for the Revolution to begin?" "Oh, yeah." Chris nodded. "I can't wait. I just hope I'll be able to finish Care and Feeding in time. I--" "Hey, Chris! Chris Meadows! Is that you?" Chris turned, startled. It was Mike and Summer, from Team M.E.C.H.A.! "Yipe! I gotta hide!" Chris gasped. But it was too late--they'd seen him. "Hey, Chris, what are you doing here?" Mike asked. "I thought you'd be back at SMSU." "No, I'm not your Au--what?" Chris asked. Mike grinned. "Summer, this is Chris Meadows, a friend of mine. He's the guy who first introduced me to anime!" "I am?" Chris asked. "I mean, yeah, I am!" He grinned. "This must be your little sister, Summer." "It was Chris who got me started on Robotech, Bubble Gum Crisis, and all those others," Mike continued. "Without him, we wouldn't be here now!" Chris grinned. "Er, yeah, that's right." "It's nice to meet you, Chris!" Summer said. "Mike's told me all about you!" "Nothing good, I hope," Chris grinned, shaking the hand of his character. "It's great seeing you again," Mike said. "Hey, who's your friend?" "Eh? Oh, this is just Gadge. He's an author." "Cool!" Mike said. "What does he write?" "Oh, technical stuff. Nothing you'd be interested in," Gadge said. "Okay." Mike glanced over his shoulder. "Hey, we gotta run, other people to talk to. But it was nice running into you." "Bye!" Summer added. They made their way off into the partygoing crowd. "That was...interesting," Gadge said. "I guess we now know where your altiversal counterpart fits into the story..." "Yeah..." Chris finished the punch. "Hey, I think we'd better get moving." "Why?" Gadge asked. "Zen Navigator's coming this way." "Eep!" The dim music and vocals that had been building up suddenly increased in volume: The rythmic, pulsing beat blasted out from everywhere and nowhere, deafening everyone who was still sober enough to hear it. "Go Go Gadget Earplugs!" "Gadge! What is that?!?" shouted R_M over the din. "I think I know!" Gadge yelled though a Gadget-megaphone, "Stand up straight and open your mouth!" "WHAT?!?" "Just do it!" And then, it came: The sound of a dozen voices singing clearly: "OOOOOOOooooOOOooooOOOOoooOOOO, OOOooooOOOooooOOOOOOoooOOOOOOO!!!!!!" The front door burst open, and a flash of green light shone though the room as something, moving too fast to be seen, quickly darted about the room on long, arching curves, swinging from one partygoer to another. And then, it was gone, and the music gone with it. Robotech_Master blinked, then inhaled, then gasped slightly. "What the...?" his tounge rolled around inside his mouth, "Why do I suddenly have cool, minty-tasting breath?" Everyone else in the room was similarly tasting the insides of their mouths, with the possible exceptions of Benedict and Bulletproof. Gadge just looked to his fellow Author and smiled. "You'll find out." The others all came to more or less the same conclusion: "Wow. That's really wierd." And across the street, a tall, rounded, definately inhuman figure stood atop a building, watching the swinging front doors of the Jazz club. The smell of cool, minty fresh breath from the building was so strong as to almost be visible. Without uttering a word, the figure retreated back into the shadows of Bob City, accompanyed by that music and the chanting voices... "OOOOooooooOOOOOOOoooooOOOOOooooOOOOOO, OOOoooOOOoooOOooooOOOOO!!!!" Spectrum stood idly by one of the pizza carts, munching on a slice. He'd decided to stow the armor, packing it in the custom briefcase Han's had designed. It cost him most of his remaining cash, but Spectrum wanted to look good that night, so he'd stopped at Bob's Tux Shop (Best Bowties in Bob). "Hey Spectrum." Summer smiled. "Hey yourself, kiddo. How are you doing?" "No ill effects, the doc said. That was a pretty weird experience though. It felt like..." "Yeah." Spectrum smiled at the young teen. "I know. Same here." "Thanks." "Thank you. And your friends. You saved my butt. I owe you." "Hey, we're the team surpreme. Spectrum, when you went into overdrive, that was the weirdest feeling, right before I passed out, it was like I didn't know where I ended..." "And where I began. Yep. I was in there too. Maybe we'll do it again someday. You never know...come on, wanna dance with an old fart?" Robotech_Master and Gadge were skulking around towards the back of the room, trying to keep the towering forms of Space Moose and Bulletproof between themselves and Zen Navigator. This was a fairly easy task, since Zen had spotten them earlier and was attempting to use his powers of Zen Navigation to track down the two Authors. "Think he'll see us?" asked R_M. "Not in a million Defense Squad postings," replied Gadge dryly. "Oh. In that case, we'd better get moving," Chris said with a smile. Gadge returned the smile and pushed the back door to the kitchen partway open, feigning a search for an escaspe route. "Yeah, right. And in any case, all we'd have to do is...uh-oh..." Suddenly worried, Gadge opened the door and stepped inside. "Chris, we may have a problem here." "What?" The other Author followed the green-jacketed figure into the unoccupied kitchen. "I think this party is in serious trouble." "If you're thinking that the cooking staff left, that's no problem. It's all catered by Bunzi, remember? Look, there's the stack of extra pizzas right there by the delivery door." "It's not the food I'm worried about. Look at that." Gadge pointed to a single, solitary keg sitting next the the ceiling-high pile of pizza boxes. R_M's jaw dropped. "Oh no. You're right. This is terrible." "Yes. We're running out of beer." "Maybe that keg will be enough?" "Don't bet on that." Gadge pointed out through the round windows leading back towards the front, to where Space Moose had just finished downing an entire keg of Canadian microbrew and was already ripping the top off another with his can-opener antlers. "The Moosely Moron can do that all night without even getting a buzz." "His metabolism is that fast?" "Partly. And partly because he hasn't got that many brain cells anyway." Robotech_Master paused to consider the situation. "Maybe we can Edit up more beer?" "Are you kidding? I've never even tasted the stuff, and you haven't got anywhere near the experience of a Senior Author. We wouldn't know a good microbrew if we drown in it." "Well, I still think it's worth a shot. Here, let me give it a try..." R_M waved Gadge aside and stood before an empty stainless-steel table. "I'll try something simple, just one pitcher of generic beer." He closed his eyes and concentrated, holding his hands out as if gripping a handle...and soon enough, a tall pitcher of yellowing material appeared in his hand. A solid, spongy material, that is. Gadge walked up and prodded the top. "Nerf?" "Oops. Must be a residue from the last Author War." "So much for Edit." "How about Benedict? He's got a built-in Autobar, right?" Gadge shook his head. "Nope. He mainly stokes hard liquor and bioweapons." "What's the difference?" "Not a heak of a lot. I think the biologicals go better with chicken." Before Chris could get in a response, there was a sudden roar of wind outside the building, and the rear delivery doors flew open with a crash. A flurry of dust suddenly filled the kitchen, blinding both Authors. "Go Go Gadget Gas Mask!" A goggled breathing unit quickly deployed from Gadge's coat collar, but it was not needed: the dust settled as quickly as it had arisen, revealing a massive stack of metal-hooped barrels filling the back of the kitchen. Both Authors stared in awe. "Beer..." "Tons of it...and look at these shipping labels...there must be a couple kegs here from every microbrewery in Seattle." "But how? Did Sabre, or The Swede come by?" "I don't think so, they would've spooged us when they had the chance to...wait a minute..." Gadge stepped forwards and removed a label from one barrel that wasn't like the others (the label, not the barrel). It wasn't even a shipping label. It was... "A Post-It Note?" said Chris, "Oh no..." ------------------------------------------------ | I noticed that your party was running short | | on refreshments. Seeing that you were almost | | out of beer, I took the liberty of procuring | | this modest sampling from the Northwest. I | | feel I must urge you to drink responsibly, if | | drink you must, and have notified Bob City | | Cabs to have taxis standing by after the | | party is over. I am sorry that I cannot stop | | to attend the party myself, but there's a | | house on fire in Nevada and a kitten up a | | tree in New Hampshire that I'd better take | | care of. I hope you do not mind my borrowing | | some of your pizza, but you have some of my | | favorite toppings. | | ---Superguy | | | ------------------------------------------------ "DOHW!!!" It was 9:00. The party had been in full swing for about three hours, and the atmosphere was getting pretty mellow. In other words, people were getting sloshed. Some people had formed groups, and others sat and ate or drank alone. Even the caterers were taking a break, slow dancing out in the middle of the dance floor. One of these groups consisted of Adam Douglas from Team M.E.C.H.A., Bulletproof from the Extreme Team, Benedict the Dalek (who had arrived just a few minutes before) from Space Moose's team, and Spectrum, who didn't have a team yet. He sat next to the hulking Bulletproof, glancing occasionally in the direction of Tornado, Summer, then at his metal briefcase next to him. By some coincidence, the TONN news crew that was covering the party had set up its cameras very close to this table, and Adam was watching them over his shoulder, none of the others at his table being very talkative at the moment. One of the TONN news crew tapped Shana on the shoulder. "We may have to cut the remote a bit short," he said. "Oh, great. Why? We've already had it cut from a minute to forty-five seconds..." she trailed off in irritation. "There's been something happening on the Radian story." "Really." "Yeah." "What?" "Well, from what Gerber..." "Gerbre." "Whatever. What Gerber said was, the California Penal Board has basically said, 'okay, she's the Wicked Witch of the West, she can break out if she wants to,' and cleared everybody involved of blame. Except her. And her cat." "This is news?" "It's more news than _this_. A pizza party in Bob? I mean, so, okay, downtown Bob's a pile of rubble, but Radian almost destroyed the planet. Forget Tonya Harding, Radian is _news_." "Okay, okay. How short are we?" "Thirty seconds including lead in." "Thirty seconds." "Thirty seconds." "Let me guess. We've been moved into the 'Lifestyles' segment." "You got it." "Aaargh." Adam turned back to the table. "Did you guys hear that?" he asked. "What?" Spectrum asked. "About Radian." Adam related what he'd just overheard, and shook his head. "I just don't trust these mages," Adam said. "They nearly destroyed the world, y'know." He sipped at his beer (his fourth so far). "And who's to say they can't do it again?" Marie's eyes defocused as she sat at her table. Four smoked-out joints sat in the table's ashtray, and there was a sizable stack of bottles and cans around her--everything from Anheiser-Busch to Zimas. Several medical warnings were showing on the right side of her visor--she was barely able to focus on them. BAC level 1.2, Blood Chemical warnings, and...Alpha Wave Pattern spikes? What the heck did that mean. Marie pondered on it for what seemed like a few seconds. When she checked her visor's chronometer display, twenty minutes had passed. 'Four joints and a 1.2 BAC never messed me up this bad before...', Marie pondered. 'Actually, I should be unconscious at this point...' She decided she should get up and head back to her apartment before she did something stupid. Abruptly, she discovered that she could no longer feel either of her arms. As for her legs, she could feel them ok. All...*seven* of them?! It was getting harder and harder to think straight. Where was she? Someone shrugged, causing the world to tip crazily on it's side. Marie was abruptly conscious that someone had fallen over. Closer examination revealed that it was, in fact, her. "Dam't...W'ne," she whispered, as the ceiling did the Twist above her. "Fl'w'rs of L'f my ash..." "You ok?" a concerned voice asked. Thoughts coalesced in Marie's mind--Shana. "Hmph. Don't understand how you got through the training courses when you can't even hardly hold this much booze. Guys, c'mere and help me..." Marie was abruptly flying through the air--no, they had lifted her up. Someone was propped up against a wall...with a force of will, Marie opened her eyes. Her vision was tunneling...The lights of the tunnel flicked by overhead, and suddenly she was staring into the lights of an oncoming car...Whaaa?! She blinked, and someone's...her...head fell over. She lacked the strength to raise it. Her tunnel-vision excluded everything but a small group of people...She didn't recognize most of them, but she did see...Spectrum! Her vision clouded over, and she abruptly fell unconscious. "I do not understand," Benedict said. "If mages are bad, why do you permit them to continue to exist?" Adam spoke up. "Because...because..." He shook his head, and belched. He felt dizzy. "Er...Spectrum, why don't you tell him?" "We're heroes," Spectrum said. "We can't go around killing people without cause..." "This does not compute. If mages endanger the planet, is that not sufficient cause?" "Not all mages are bad," Spectrum said. "Others have fought to save the planet. Wonder Grunion, for example." "I must gather data," Benedict decided. "But still, most of th'magi are evil!" Adam said, voice slightly slurred. "And Radian nearly destroyed th'world, but she's still runnin' around free. We have to DO something, put a stop to their threat once and for all!" "You mean kill them?" Bulletproof asked. "Dam' straight." Adam felt dizzy--he'd never had this much to drink before, and when he woke up, he probably wouldn't remember much of what he was saying. "There're too many dam' mages around...world'd be better off without 'em." Adam suddenly felt very sleepy, and lowered his head to the table. "Kill th'mages..." he murmured. "Kill 'em..." He began to snore. Spectrum thought on this. "I dunno...maybe he has something there. At least concerning Radian. She should be brought to justice, before every card carrying shaman gets the idea they can go do as they please." Benedict droned, "If they are a threat, should they not be eliminated?" "Perhaps..." Bulletproof said. It was an idea that might bear consideration. Marie was asleep...Maybe? She didn't remember anything before this--so why would she be sleeping? She had no memories of 'sleep'. Besides, how could she sleep with the voices in her...she struggled for the word... head. The voices screamed at her, yelled at her, cajoled her (what did that word mean, she wondered, and how could she remember what hearing was if she had no memories before this point) kill (something bobbed to the surface of her thoughts--she wasn't supposed to kill) Kill (Not supposed to) KILL (it's wrong...) KILL! (no!) **KILL!!** (who?) The voices whispered to her of magic (what was magic--she had never heard of that before) and of evil (that she had heard of) and of the Magi (the who?) No, the Magi--Magic-users. The Who are a band. (ok, cool.) And the voices began screaming in her mind (mind?) kill the magi (why?) Kill the Magi (but why?) They're evil--KILL THE MAGI! (yes...Magi were evil, and heroes fought evil! Spectrum was a hero, so he would kill Magi too! If she killed Magi, she'd be like Spectrum! A hero!!) The discussion around Bulletproof's table finally broke up as Spectrum pushed back his seat and rose, Benedict scooted off, and Bulletproof clanked off, leaving holes in the floor behind him. Adam continued to sit there, snoring. Spectrum placed a "do not disturb" sign on the table, and Mr. Safety placed a ticket on Adam's back for sleeping in a public place while intoxicated, a clear violation of the 1991 Urban Vagrancy Act of Bob City. Spectrum cocked an eyebrow at him, then picked up his briefcase with his armor stored inside, and turned to leave. Marie snapped awake. Hm, perhaps 'snapped' is a bit of an exaggeration. Squelched awake was more like it. The room was still practicing Slam Dancing, but she somehow felt slightly relieved. A voice whispered something in the back of her mind, but whatever it was saying faded out somewhere between the joints she had smoked and the pint of whisky she had bonged. She peered at the notebook which was sticking out of her Butt-Pack. With a monumental effort, she reached back and snagged it. Hm, she thought, that looks interesting. Whoa! Diagrams! Hm, yeah, that looks like it'd be fun to do with Spectrum... Her thoughts swung back to Spectrum, and she put the notebook away. She had had some reason for not telling him who she was, but quite frankly, she couldn't remember what it was. Staggering to her feet, she wandered over to him. "H'y...(hic) Shpectr'm?" she slurred, "I got s'm'thin' t'show ya..." "Whoa," Jake said, staring off into space. "It all makes sense now! Incredible..." Jake grabbed some napkins and began to draw, creating a massive, complex diagram. Ray, noticing his friend was able to move again, wandered over. "What'cha doin'?" Ray asked. Jake shushed him and scribbled faster. "'s'incredible," Jake said in a sing-song sort of voice, "dunno why i'never though 'a th's b'fore." Ray peered at the technical drawing that Jake was making. "Jake, what the heck is this?" "y'll see..." "Jake, you're high. Guys, Jake's high!" "I am not!" Overhead, Wayne kicked around in a vain attempt to un-stick himself. Mr. Safety brought a folding ladder right over, set it up (making sure that both of the two (2) braces were correctly locked, and conscripting one (1) bystander to hold the ladder for him), and climbed up it. "Hey! Dude!" Wayne said. "Yer going to get me down from here, right?" "You are in violation of Section B, Subheading 4, Paragraph 3c of the 1967 Bubblegum Regulatory Code," Mr. Safety announced, writing out a ticket and sticking it to the gum wrapped around Wayne's waist. "You are also in violation of the Celebratory Assembly Safety Order of 1984, and the 1975 Health and Public Safety Act, and..." Mr. Safety wrote out six more tickets and stuck them to Wayne, concluding with, "...and your Royal Command Battloid is doubleparked." His duty done, Mr. Safety climbed back down the ladder, folded it back up, and carried it off to the utility closet, pausing along the way to issue seven more tickets to partygoers. Even though he didn't look like he was enjoying himself at the party, Mr. Safety was having one hell (TM) of a time. "Hey! Aren't ya gonna get me down from here? HEY!" Wayne sighed, and resigned himself to dangling up there for a while. As Gadge and R_M circulated through the party, a beeping sound suddenly came from Gadge's jacket. "Eh?" Gadge asked. "What is it, Elma?" he said into his lapel. He listened to the response for a moment, then paled. "Really? I'll be there right away." "What's wrong?" Chris asked. "Chris, something's come up," Gadge said apologetically. "I have to get back to the Real World right away. Will you be okay here?" R_M nodded. "Sure, no problem. Just let me get my Cyc-bike out of VTAS-1." "Thanks, Chris. I'll see you around. Good luck finishing up!" A few moments later, the Edit-enhanced Jeep took off into the sky, and Robotech_Master stood beside his Cyclone and watched it go. "I hope he's all right," Chris said, before turning and walking back into the club. Spectrum struggled against the weight of the Tornado armor as Marie wobbled and leaned heavily on the hero. "Um, Tornado, ow, you're ssquishing me. Um, maybe you better let me help you home." Amigoid and his wife walked by, rolling the catering carts towards the door. Marie shook her head, but she was still seeing double. Except why were the two Spectrums dressed different? She reached for the one in the Pizza Uniform and lost her balance, pitching forward onto the cart. Spectrum grabbed the cart handle. "Sir, maybe I could borrow this. My friend has had a little too much to drink..." The Amigoid smiled and nodded, watching him roll the Invid out the door. When they were out of earshot, his wife leaned over "Someone's getting lucky tonight!" "Nonsense. Spectrum is a noble hero. He'd never take advantage of her in her condition." Sheri looked at him, grinning. "...Not! You made him to be like you, right? When did you ever turn down a roll in the hay? Besides, who said I was talking about Spectrum?" Digging into her purse, she pulled out a can of whipped cream and a bag of inspiration dust. "Hoooboy..." Marie felt like she was light as a feather, floating peacefully above the ground. She opened one eye, and discovered she was. Spectrum stood next to her, his free hand radiating energy. He cleared his throat, and gestured out at the rain slick streets of Bob City. "Uh, I'd call you a cab, but I think you need a u-haul. Listen can I walk you back home?" "Shhhwere, ...no...no. Too far. Maybe your playsh? " "Can't. Got kicked out." "Bummer." "Look, I'd offer to get you a hotel room, but to be honest, I'm broke. I was going to bum a ride with Team M.E.C.H.A. back to their place and hang out there. Maybe they could find a place for you..." A dim flicker of awareness crossed what passed for a brain in Marie's sloshed head. "NO! No...sorry, juss not my scene, hey! I got some of that money stuff, here in my pack..." She reached out and grabbed a handful of paper and handed it to Spectrum. Spectrum gaped at the wad of bills and looked at the other pieces of paper. Wow. He looked at the armored mystery woman. "You draw these?" "Nahh," She slurred, "I lerrrrnd it from a, hic, High Liberal. You gonna buy me a hotel room or what?" "You talked me into it. Whats that beeping sound?" "My phonesh off the hook. Jest a sec. Lemmie hangup." Spectrum concentrated, and generated more antigravitational energy. Using the retractable straps, he slung his briefcase over his back. Opening his umbrella, he walked along with the floating Tornado. "Shoot," he muttered, starting in surprise when a shoulder laser from Marie's armor blew out the streetlight next to them, throwing the sidewalk into semi-darkness. "I forgot to say goodbye to the gang." Marie reached out and pulled Spectrum close, jolting to the ground. They stood face to face, and Marie rolled her visor back, "Spectrum. I want you..." A flash from the sparking lightpost lit her face but for an instant. Spectrum saw in the semidarkness a beautiful young woman, and impulsively kissed her. That's it, her final working braincell said, I'm outta here. Marie pitched forward and her faceplate fell shut as she passed out. WELL. THAT WAS QUITE A CROSSOVER. WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO THE MIGHTY MUDDY POWER GRANGERS? WILL BOB CITY EVER RECOVER? WHAT WILL HAPPEN BETWEEN MARIE AND SPECTRUM? WILL WE EVER KNOW? WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN SPECTRUM DISCOVERS WHO MARIE IS? WILL HE BE MAD? DID THEY OR DIDN'T THEY? WHAT IS JAKE'S MYSTERIOUS PROTOCULTURE-INSPIRED NEW DESIGN? WHAT WILL COME OF THIS MEETING BETWEEN BULLETPROOF, SPECTRUM, BENEDICT, AND ADAM? (AS IF YOU COULDN'T GUESS BY NOW...) WHEN DID THIS MEETING TAKE PLACE, ANYWAY, CONTINUITY-WISE? WILL ROB FURR MAKE SOME SORT OF EFFORT TO QUANTIFY IT, OR WILL HE JUST SAY, "EH, THE HELL WITH IT," AND MUTTER VILE IMPRECATIONS? WHAT EXACTLY *ARE* SUPERGUY'S FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPINGS? WHO WAS THAT FRESH-BREATH, ER, WHATEVER? 'OOOOOOOOooooOOOOO'? WHAT KIND OF BATTLE CRY IS THAT? WILL WAYNE EVER GET DOWN FROM WHERE BUBBLEGUM BABE STUCK HIM? YOU WON'T FIND THIS OUT IN THE NEXT MEGACROSSOVER POST, BECAUSE AS OF NOW, THE MEGACROSSOVER IS OVER. FINIS. KAPUT. SO TUNE IN TO FUTURE EPISODES OF TEAM M.E.C.H.A., SPECTRUM, SPACE MOOSE, FORCE TEN, AND CRAPSHOOT. YOU MAY FIND SOME OF THE ANSWERS THERE. SUPERGUY. THE REAL THING. <<>> ========================================================================= Date: Thu, 13 Apr 1995 12:00:00 Reply-To: UCF SUPERGUY List Sender: UCF SUPERGUY List From: Robotech_Master Subject: Previews When Sarah Conner goes on a shopping trip to Springfield, a chain of events is set in motion that leads to a confrontation in the tiny European hamlet of Terrania. Don't miss Team M.E.C.H.A. Trade Ether-Back #5: "On the Care and Feeding of Unicorns," Sarah Conner's twelve-part solo adventure, written by Chris Meadows and Eric Alfred Burns. Coming soon, to an archive site near you...